An Apartment near Midnight - 02.13.06
Valentine's Day. I hate this fucking day. Time for a story to remember why we should all hate this day.
Once upon a time there was a little Princess and a Prince who lived in a huge castle in the Kingdom of Nowhere. They had nothing and no-one but each other for a Witch and her slave (i.e. Shitty Couple) kept them locked up in the castle at all times except on special days when the Witch took them to faraway Kingdoms people only dreamed of. These Kingdoms were beautiful and fucked up and wide beyond the sea. And during those times the little Prince and Princess were happy for being in ignorance is damn blissful. That is, until one day an evil Djinn fucked up everything, as Djinns are wont to do.
Wont... what kind of fucking word is that anyway?
He saw the little Prince and so sweet was he that the Djinn could do nothing but wish to steal him away for his own palace in the strange lands vast as the sea. And so he did. And the Shitty Couple were so angry, but fearful were they that the Djinn would choose to take their lives as well. They fled, taking the little Princess with them back to the Kingdom of Nowhere.
The little Princess fell ill from shooting up too much. She would always take the needles between her toes to hide the track lines. For who would ever look in such a place? For years she saw neither sun or moon for too long because the Witch told her it would fuck her up if she did. The evil doctors on her side said the same thing, all dancing to her strings. These were some of the worst years of her life, for the little Princess was so fucked up she couldn't do anything with herself but be wretched and pathetic as most Junkies are.
Then, one day, a new Prince came into her life. She met him one cold day out under the Trees of Lies. She had been feeling better lately because the Shitty Couple was too preoccupied with themselves to pay any attention to her. The new Prince befriended her and for years he would sneak up to the castle where she was imprisoned most of the time and damned if the little fucker couldn't climb.
The Junkie Princess enjoyed his company so much she did the most god awful fucked up thing she could do; she fell in love with him. Or she thought she did because, let's face it, do Junkies even know what the fuck they're saying half the time? It's anything for another hit, anything to end those moments with the shakes and depression. Even when they don't know they're addicts.
Things continued on like this for some time, the two of them sneaking out from time to time, and slowly, the Junkie Princess thought herself happy. She trusted him. Talked about running off from the Kingdom of Nowhere into Somewhere. But what she didn't know was that the new Prince was really a Lying Fucker sent by another god-damned Djinn. Yes, boys and girls, she fell for it all, and eventually gave everything she had to the Lying Fucker. He explained half-truths to her, built up all her hope that maybe someday she'd be in Somewhere one day and without a care in the fucking world. No more hauntings, no more spreads. He made plans with her to leave that night and never look back.
The time came and went and of course the Lying Fucker didn't show up, because that's what they do best. The Junkie Princess eventually went home, feeling like an idiot, and the next day the grueling work the Shitty Couple set for her began again. The Witch had her completely. This continued until one day the Junkie Princess couldn't take it anymore, and she tried to end it all. Course she fucked that up too, but that's all a different story.
Many years later, another guy she thought was a Prince would come into her life, but he turned out to be a Worthless Dick, but by then, the Junkie Princess had made it to the Kingdom of Second Best and after a brief and fucked up night of What-the-Hell-Is-That, she skipped town and made for someplace new.
It's been like that for many years now, but the Junkie Princess no longer looks for Princes. She knows they don't exist, there was only one ever, but since it's fucked up to be with your brother and now he's/she's kindof a fucked up thing too, there aren't any anywhere. Because truly, all the handsome, rich, or successful Wannabes want is the little round bouncy things in front and the little round bouncy things in back and really if that's all the treasure of the world, we live in a box of Phoneys.
They can try to explain all they want, but the truth is, it's not the Djinns of the world, and it's not the Shitty Couples. The truth is that all Princesses can never be, because once they realize the truth of the world, they become Witches too so that the world is just populated with Dicks, Liars, Fuckers, Witches, Bitches and other such shit.
So, boys and girls, take it from me. Fuck this holiday right up the ass. Go get yourselves a good ounce of sunshine and a few beers and make a night of it, because the game of little round bouncy things plays both ways, and what the hell is the point if you can't have fun?
Fin, Fuckers.
Once upon a time there was a little Princess and a Prince who lived in a huge castle in the Kingdom of Nowhere. They had nothing and no-one but each other for a Witch and her slave (i.e. Shitty Couple) kept them locked up in the castle at all times except on special days when the Witch took them to faraway Kingdoms people only dreamed of. These Kingdoms were beautiful and fucked up and wide beyond the sea. And during those times the little Prince and Princess were happy for being in ignorance is damn blissful. That is, until one day an evil Djinn fucked up everything, as Djinns are wont to do.
Wont... what kind of fucking word is that anyway?
He saw the little Prince and so sweet was he that the Djinn could do nothing but wish to steal him away for his own palace in the strange lands vast as the sea. And so he did. And the Shitty Couple were so angry, but fearful were they that the Djinn would choose to take their lives as well. They fled, taking the little Princess with them back to the Kingdom of Nowhere.
The little Princess fell ill from shooting up too much. She would always take the needles between her toes to hide the track lines. For who would ever look in such a place? For years she saw neither sun or moon for too long because the Witch told her it would fuck her up if she did. The evil doctors on her side said the same thing, all dancing to her strings. These were some of the worst years of her life, for the little Princess was so fucked up she couldn't do anything with herself but be wretched and pathetic as most Junkies are.
Then, one day, a new Prince came into her life. She met him one cold day out under the Trees of Lies. She had been feeling better lately because the Shitty Couple was too preoccupied with themselves to pay any attention to her. The new Prince befriended her and for years he would sneak up to the castle where she was imprisoned most of the time and damned if the little fucker couldn't climb.
The Junkie Princess enjoyed his company so much she did the most god awful fucked up thing she could do; she fell in love with him. Or she thought she did because, let's face it, do Junkies even know what the fuck they're saying half the time? It's anything for another hit, anything to end those moments with the shakes and depression. Even when they don't know they're addicts.
Things continued on like this for some time, the two of them sneaking out from time to time, and slowly, the Junkie Princess thought herself happy. She trusted him. Talked about running off from the Kingdom of Nowhere into Somewhere. But what she didn't know was that the new Prince was really a Lying Fucker sent by another god-damned Djinn. Yes, boys and girls, she fell for it all, and eventually gave everything she had to the Lying Fucker. He explained half-truths to her, built up all her hope that maybe someday she'd be in Somewhere one day and without a care in the fucking world. No more hauntings, no more spreads. He made plans with her to leave that night and never look back.
The time came and went and of course the Lying Fucker didn't show up, because that's what they do best. The Junkie Princess eventually went home, feeling like an idiot, and the next day the grueling work the Shitty Couple set for her began again. The Witch had her completely. This continued until one day the Junkie Princess couldn't take it anymore, and she tried to end it all. Course she fucked that up too, but that's all a different story.
Many years later, another guy she thought was a Prince would come into her life, but he turned out to be a Worthless Dick, but by then, the Junkie Princess had made it to the Kingdom of Second Best and after a brief and fucked up night of What-the-Hell-Is-That, she skipped town and made for someplace new.
It's been like that for many years now, but the Junkie Princess no longer looks for Princes. She knows they don't exist, there was only one ever, but since it's fucked up to be with your brother and now he's/she's kindof a fucked up thing too, there aren't any anywhere. Because truly, all the handsome, rich, or successful Wannabes want is the little round bouncy things in front and the little round bouncy things in back and really if that's all the treasure of the world, we live in a box of Phoneys.
They can try to explain all they want, but the truth is, it's not the Djinns of the world, and it's not the Shitty Couples. The truth is that all Princesses can never be, because once they realize the truth of the world, they become Witches too so that the world is just populated with Dicks, Liars, Fuckers, Witches, Bitches and other such shit.
So, boys and girls, take it from me. Fuck this holiday right up the ass. Go get yourselves a good ounce of sunshine and a few beers and make a night of it, because the game of little round bouncy things plays both ways, and what the hell is the point if you can't have fun?
Fin, Fuckers.