A Dark Room - 11.27.06
Randy Jackson, the 45-year-old driver of the semi-truck, was killed when he lost control of his 2005 Mack 70"-cab tractor-trailer after being hit by the Subaru. Jackson's vehicle jackknifed and then struck a concrete overpass wall, shearing off the upper half of the cab. Jackson was killed instantly, emergency first responders said...
My lover is dead.
I don't know how long I've been standing here. I honestly have no idea.
I will not lose my shit over this.
I will not be emo about this.
I will not be a recluse.
I will breathe.
I will not hyperventilate.
This was meant. I cannot forget that. I can't. Fuck. .... fuck... fuck...
I am not a jinx anymore.
I did not kill him.
I can control my fate.
I did not curse him.
This was meant. He was a master of Fate. He knew what he was doing. He knew the price. He saved that Sleeper. He knew what he was doing. Repeat, Jinxy.
He knew what he was doing. Yes. Yes.... Yes.
I'm fifteen, maybe sixteen. He picks me up. He drives me. He gave me the green to live better on the streets. He never touched me. He looked. Damn did he look. Not until last year. Then he was my lover. He was my friend long before that. He stayed with me, slept with me even when I had black shit growing out of me. He helped hold me down when Psyche ripped it from me.
White Rabbit. White Rabbit.
This was meant. It was meant. We all die. Christ, I've died twice. He will not return. This was meant.
My lover is dead, and this was meant.