Was..it..bullshit
I..got.a..fortune..cookie..2..weeks..ago..now..when..me..and..Oliver..went..to..Chinrub..and..it..made..me..smile..because..it..said..something..like..your..days..ago..have..something....big..in..store..cant..have..it..exact..because..of..course..it..went..through..the..wash...like..Russels..number..no..im..not..hoping/trying..to..get..anything..to..happen..hell..hes..too..sillly..to..see..like..that..it..would..be..kool..to..be..work..friends..and..chill..occasionally...and..as..tempting..as..one..nighties..can..be..sometimes..espacially..oh..espacially,when..under..the..influence..of..ANY..any..stressed..alcohol..I..hate..feeling..like.a..whore..afterwards..and..crave..fornication..sometimes..but...beggers..cant..be..choosey...but..im..choosey..and..dont..give..into..any..impulse/what..if..though..hell..if..I..did..that.I..sure..as..hell..wouldnt..have..700..bucks..in..the..bank..and..would..have..no..hair..and..would..probably..be.a..coke/e/acid....head.....god..mashed..potatoes..would..look..prettier..thats..LOOK..not..taste..since..im..on..that..note.Ive..seemed..more..hungrier..like..before..I..would..be..hungry..a.lot..but..now..its..like..actual..cravings..tied.in..with..it..and..it..bugs..me..I..hate..being..hungry..so..much..and..its..harder..to..say..no..Ill..wait..until..im..hungrier..so..I..just..try.to..distract..myself..and..at..least..when..I..work...I..burn..more..calories..im..so..lazy..on..my..days..off..a.lot..of..the..time..espacially..in..the..heat..the..winters..have..so..much..more..energy..in..store..and..this..winter..I..want..to..ski..or..snowboard..again..still..havent..decided..yet..or..mix..it..up..since..I..can..do..both..I..think..I..was..slightly..better..at..snowboarding..because..I...didnt..have..to..balance..both..skis..and..Id..also..come..close..to..twisting..my..entire..leg..around..my..Mom..thinks..I..should..try..skateboarding..haha..though..I..think..thats..one..of..the.koolest...things..shes..ever..suggested..I..should..try..doing..up..there..with..the..previous..skiing..and..singing..lessons..I..did....I..want..to..do..singing..lessons..again..but..I..cant..do..everything..I..wish..I..could..see..everything..watch..everything....taste..every..food..that..ever..existed...yes..just..food..;;wink..wink.;;..for..once..a..non..dirty..other..meaning..woah...and..read..everything..but.I..cant..even..finish..one..god..damned..book..with..adderall..or..a..long..fucking..train/airplane..ride...
mmm..adderall..my..allowance..is..way..overdue...
At...the..moment...Im..trying..to..be..pessimisstic...about..the..job..at..Minute..Man..Arc..and..think..that..fortune..cookie..was..bullshit...because..they..havent..gotten..back..to..me..and..she..wasnt..in..today..hopefully..shes..just.busy..or..on..vacation..or..something...I,.kept..thinking..bad..thoughts..like..its..my..PREVIOUS..driving..record..that..had..been..improved..havent..gotten..a..speeding..ticket..in..like.2..years..hell..have..barely..gotten..pulled..over..suprisingly..ironically..after..I..pretty..much..stop..smoking..pot...they..have..nothing..on..me..now..FUCKERS..I..also..keep..thinking..about..Karls..eyes..and..how..beautiful..they..looked.,they,,were..like..literally..turquoise..one..of..ym..favorite..colors..one..of..them..and..it..was..mesmerizing..until..I..imagined..them..as.a..deep..ocean..and..me..drowning..it..but..that..was..more..before..I..have..forced..myself..to..get..over..him..the..best..I..can..and..it..has..improved..and..im..not..as..depressed..about..it..and..im..glad..he..noticed..I..wasnt..wearing..his..fucking..necklace..that..he..complemented..on..Im..wearing..it..now..but..only..because..it..matches..my..shirt..so..perfectly.....when..I..went..to..his..work..to..return..bottles..wednesday..at..least..this..time..it..was..convinently..on..the..way.to..where..I..was..also..going..the..only..flaw..then..was..my..not..throwing..one..of..the..bottles..of..alcohol..he..bought..me..and..saying..to..him..my..as..well..keep..it..since..its..all..the..memories..Ill..ever..have..;;slip;;...I..hope..hes..happy..with..his..new..friends/girlfriend..honestly..I..do.but..it..was..still..disrespectful..to...neglect..me..like.even..more..of.a..bad...habit..as..he.said..I..did..to..him..at,.least..I..didnt..lie..and..be..like..ill..call..you..and..I..really..want..to..see..you..soon..I..miss..you..etc..etc..he..didnt..get..teased//..fake..hope/happiness..that..I..was..still..there..I..made..it..clear..with..the..asshole..thing..I..did..I..was..more...immature..but...straight..forward..anyways..on..to..better..things
A..shower...and..going..to..Hampton..again..soon..Wednesday..through..Friday..and..more..people..yay...
mmm..adderall..my..allowance..is..way..overdue...
At...the..moment...Im..trying..to..be..pessimisstic...about..the..job..at..Minute..Man..Arc..and..think..that..fortune..cookie..was..bullshit...because..they..havent..gotten..back..to..me..and..she..wasnt..in..today..hopefully..shes..just.busy..or..on..vacation..or..something...I,.kept..thinking..bad..thoughts..like..its..my..PREVIOUS..driving..record..that..had..been..improved..havent..gotten..a..speeding..ticket..in..like.2..years..hell..have..barely..gotten..pulled..over..suprisingly..ironically..after..I..pretty..much..stop..smoking..pot...they..have..nothing..on..me..now..FUCKERS..I..also..keep..thinking..about..Karls..eyes..and..how..beautiful..they..looked.,they,,were..like..literally..turquoise..one..of..ym..favorite..colors..one..of..them..and..it..was..mesmerizing..until..I..imagined..them..as.a..deep..ocean..and..me..drowning..it..but..that..was..more..before..I..have..forced..myself..to..get..over..him..the..best..I..can..and..it..has..improved..and..im..not..as..depressed..about..it..and..im..glad..he..noticed..I..wasnt..wearing..his..fucking..necklace..that..he..complemented..on..Im..wearing..it..now..but..only..because..it..matches..my..shirt..so..perfectly.....when..I..went..to..his..work..to..return..bottles..wednesday..at..least..this..time..it..was..convinently..on..the..way.to..where..I..was..also..going..the..only..flaw..then..was..my..not..throwing..one..of..the..bottles..of..alcohol..he..bought..me..and..saying..to..him..my..as..well..keep..it..since..its..all..the..memories..Ill..ever..have..;;slip;;...I..hope..hes..happy..with..his..new..friends/girlfriend..honestly..I..do.but..it..was..still..disrespectful..to...neglect..me..like.even..more..of.a..bad...habit..as..he.said..I..did..to..him..at,.least..I..didnt..lie..and..be..like..ill..call..you..and..I..really..want..to..see..you..soon..I..miss..you..etc..etc..he..didnt..get..teased//..fake..hope/happiness..that..I..was..still..there..I..made..it..clear..with..the..asshole..thing..I..did..I..was..more...immature..but...straight..forward..anyways..on..to..better..things
A..shower...and..going..to..Hampton..again..soon..Wednesday..through..Friday..and..more..people..yay...