What?
I can't breathe. Every time I start thinking about everything. About work. About school (and classes which have way too much reading). About the GRE. About graduate school applications. About letters of recommendation. About getting everything I need (I have no dress pants. No nice shirts to wear to work). About the fact that I just started eating baby spinach and that there may be e coli in it. super. About the time I don't have to go out and be a normal college senior. When was the last time I went on a date with my boyfriend?
About the fact that I'm sick. I'm on pills that make me break out everywhere. I seem to have permanently lost my ability to balance (not a joke) and I've been falling over alot lately (also not as funny as it sounds). I'm tired all the time. I never feel awake or alert enough to do my work and so I end up at grad school websites for the umpteenth time trying to burn the due dates into my brain and figure out how to write a personal statement and if there's anything special they need from my "recommenders".
What about MY life? What about going to the movies? Or going to a club? or a bar? Or going out to dinner with Shawn? Or going up to Saratoga for a day? Or going to a concert? What about me? What ABOUT me? It just doesn't seem fair. I know that I need the job. I know I need the money. But it always feels like the one thing that's pushing me over the edge. I just don't have time. To study. To do well in classes. To be a person.
About the fact that I'm sick. I'm on pills that make me break out everywhere. I seem to have permanently lost my ability to balance (not a joke) and I've been falling over alot lately (also not as funny as it sounds). I'm tired all the time. I never feel awake or alert enough to do my work and so I end up at grad school websites for the umpteenth time trying to burn the due dates into my brain and figure out how to write a personal statement and if there's anything special they need from my "recommenders".
What about MY life? What about going to the movies? Or going to a club? or a bar? Or going out to dinner with Shawn? Or going up to Saratoga for a day? Or going to a concert? What about me? What ABOUT me? It just doesn't seem fair. I know that I need the job. I know I need the money. But it always feels like the one thing that's pushing me over the edge. I just don't have time. To study. To do well in classes. To be a person.