How Flynn Lost His Shoe, or The Inebriate

Oct 31, 2007 23:35

[flynn meets the blind woman again in the wilderness]

when i found him, he was caught by his hair, tangled in the tree's branches, kicking in the wind.

"hello there, are you quite alright?" i asked gingerly pretending that i did not notice him hanging from the top of his head.

"of course why would you ask?" he tried to keep a calm voice as he shouted down at me while straightening his body (still his toes not touching the soil), trying to give the impression that he was in fact suave and had not just been caught prostrate and squirming to free himself.

"o ok," but i did not move to leave. i wanted to see how long he would hold that half-genuine smile he was using to cover his annoyed and pained face. i unfolded my picnic under his toes and to the right. "what game do you play?" i demanded, innocently enough (as if hanging from a tree were a sport).

"i do not know whatever it is that you mean," he retorted gracefully crossing his arms while the wind swing him softly like a pendulum. "well have a good day, ma'am."

"im here to picnic! ive not even begun my lunch."

"well good day ma'am," (his hair began to strain his scalp, he wanted me to move desperately so he could stop hiding his pain).

"dont be selfish," i insisted still ignoring his pain since he couldnt eat his own pride, "you can share your shade, its a cool day out, isn't it."

"good day ma'am," i saw panic on his face this time and a desperation as if he was begging me to leave him. i began to unpack my bag.

"could i bother you for a bottle opener?" i asked.

"good day, ma'am" his voice was growing shriller.

"hello!" i said comically mugging shock, "are you quite alright?"

"what does it look like!?" he shouted, finally giving up his act, uncrossing his arms and beginning again to flail ungracefully in the air. "my hair is caught in the tangled branches!" he was reaching for the branch with both hands but his suit jacket would not allow him to raise his arm high enough.

"o my, what a predicament! shall i help you down?"

"yes! yes!" i graciously had a knife handy and began sawing at his hair after finding a rock to precariously use as a stepladder.

"Are you sure you want me to remove your hair and your strength and your pride?"

"yes! yes!" he could not keep his voice from becoming shrill any longer. when he was free he fell on his back, i pretended not to notice, busying my self with gracefully stepping off my rock and fixing my shirt and sleeves. he stood up, straightened his brown suit and stood crossarmed in front of me again "why did you leave me there?" he demanded without thanks.

"i thought maybe you were 6 feet tall," i guessed, "that is a very normal height for men of your ballast. i did not imagine that you were caught!" he stamped his feet. he stretched his back. he rubbed his ragged hair. he still refused to reject his pride.

"its awfully rude of you to drink in front of me," he stated awkwardly, manipulatively, loudly. i grudgingly handed him the bottle of wine which he opened (since he did in fact have a bottle opener). he drank the entire bottle loudly. he now sat down beside me where i was sitting facing the creek, as if friends. or lovers. he leaned across my lap to reach for my turkey sandwich. he tore off the bread around where i had taken a bite, threw that piece away, and devoured the rest of the sandwich in two bites. as he finished the second bite, i deftly pushed him in the creek. he looked up at me as if innocent and victimized, his face muddy from the creek. he clambered up the bank fruitlessly. i watched him as if he were merely a trout.

"throw me a stick, you witch" he called out to me through his mouthful of mud. i collected my bags, busying myself as if i were leaving. "wait! wait! ma'am please!"

"are you quite alright down there, little trout? is there something that you need?"

"i need to get out of this dirty creek!" he shouted back.

"a fish out of water?" i asked smiling at my own joke, "where do you think you belong, if not down there? if i want you, i can look for you under my boot soles." but i grabbed a branch and stuck it in his face for him to grapple onto.

"wait, wait! my shoe has fallen off" he complained as i was dragging his damp body out. i picked up my bag and turned on my heel as he stood crouched on the bank squinting into the water looking for his shoe. "wait, wait!" i came back, i fished that shoe out from under a log and threw it in the tree.

"get it yourself, you muddy headed bastard." i looked back over my shoulder only once to see that he had gotten his hair tangled again trying to retrieve his shoe.
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