Wintery Malaise
Work and life trudge along, beats the alternative but it's nothing to write home about.
My sister kicked her man to the curb, which has resulted in some rather stunning personal revelations: it may shock you, but it turns out my perspective is not a) always reflective of reality or b) the only one that's important. Contain your surprise. Without going into the details of someone else's life, for the past 2.5 years I've felt like I was the only one who was seriously fucked up over my mom's death, and it turns out that's not the case at all, which is, in some ways a relief since it makes me feel less alone and uniquely unsuited for adulthood, but is also you know, not good, because my sister has been sad and alone, in her own way.
My friend Liora's mother is dying of pancreatic cancer. I just saw her for the first time since she came back from Canada last night, and she's kind of a wreck, since she basically want to be in Toronto, but her mother is in major denial and refuses to let Liora take time off from her Ph.D. which sounds oddly familiar as my mother first told me she didn't want to derail my thesis, and that I should just come home for the funeral, so apparently parents are sort of deluded about their impact in our lives.
There's a lot that's familiar, and I'm trying to be helpful without being oppressive, because while I basically wanted as much information as possible, I realize that others may not want to talk about this all the time.
So you know, that's life, the shit part of life to be sure, but life.
I"ve turned in two out of eight thesis chapters, should be handing in another this week. Whee.
My sister kicked her man to the curb, which has resulted in some rather stunning personal revelations: it may shock you, but it turns out my perspective is not a) always reflective of reality or b) the only one that's important. Contain your surprise. Without going into the details of someone else's life, for the past 2.5 years I've felt like I was the only one who was seriously fucked up over my mom's death, and it turns out that's not the case at all, which is, in some ways a relief since it makes me feel less alone and uniquely unsuited for adulthood, but is also you know, not good, because my sister has been sad and alone, in her own way.
My friend Liora's mother is dying of pancreatic cancer. I just saw her for the first time since she came back from Canada last night, and she's kind of a wreck, since she basically want to be in Toronto, but her mother is in major denial and refuses to let Liora take time off from her Ph.D. which sounds oddly familiar as my mother first told me she didn't want to derail my thesis, and that I should just come home for the funeral, so apparently parents are sort of deluded about their impact in our lives.
There's a lot that's familiar, and I'm trying to be helpful without being oppressive, because while I basically wanted as much information as possible, I realize that others may not want to talk about this all the time.
So you know, that's life, the shit part of life to be sure, but life.
I"ve turned in two out of eight thesis chapters, should be handing in another this week. Whee.