Secrets Behind the Tinted Glass
A window's washed by closing time.
Come opening it's tinted green.
At first you think 'It's nothing special'
But every night you wipe it clean.
And every day, returning to it's soiled tint.
You start to question what its cause could be.
But not a thought could come to mind.
You think maybe boogers, or maybe grass stains.
Boogers being the likely thing.
You laugh thinking grass stains could be it.
You leave that night, expecting its return.
And sure enough, it's been reborn.
You curse, and shout, you just don't understand.
Could this be someone's personal sneeze guard?
You take a look at camera footage.
And all through the night...
There's no sign of anything askew.
No homeless man wiping dirty sleeves on the glass.
No pranksters flicking snot at it.
No paint, no grass, no nothing at all.
It befuddles you to the point of madness.
It now keeps you awake at night.
What could you have missed?
Surely it's not some clever ruse.
You know what you saw.
You know that it's real.
But why...
Why can't you get to its source?
Returning to work, all tired and foggy.
Your eyes never leaving that pane.
Tired you may be.
But you refuse to close your eyes.
Later that day.
Your eyes start to close.
And next thing you know.
You're dreaming.
A dream of a river of snot, raining down.
Spattering all over that one pane of glass.
Then, suddenly.
You're startled awake.
It's your boss staring you in the face.
He looks at you with an awkward glare, and asks..
You're always here first, so why do you never pull the curtains when you arrive?
You ponder, and ask...
What? What do you mean?
And your boss replies.
'That big green roll up translucent sheet above the window is a curtain. Every day I arrive, I do it myself. And I thought I was absent of mind.'