(no subject)
everything is getting under my skin here lately. sometimes i just dont know what to do about anything anymore. its just everything thats making me crazy/sad/unexplainable. i mean, its *someone*, its friends, its family, its finishing school, its just EVERYTHING imaginable. i sit here and i often wonder what to do about things, what to think about things, and i wish i had the answers for it. i guess this is all just part of life, but why is that now when i SHOULD be at my happiest, it seems that im at worst. i know they say things cant get any worse but i just dont understand anything thats going on with my life right now. i just sometimes want to be alone and i wish all this would just go away and let me take a breather for a little bit. i wish i had people to stop bothering me about thinks. i wish some of my teachers werent complete assholes, like my economics teacher who is telling me i am missing 2 tests and i could fail the class if i dont make them up which is such bullshit because of the fact that i know i took one of them, the other i didnt because i was on the band trip, and he is "supposedly" going to give us a day this week for us to make up the tests, which he better because if not then im screwed, and everytime i try to go after school things get screwed up and i end up not being able to. i also wish i saw my friends more. things have been just so crazy that i havent been able to see them much this week.. and theres also the fact that if i dont tell *someone* how i feel soon, i may never have my chance to... i mean should i? should i not? i know that right now i risk getting hurt, but its just so hard for me to keep these feelings all bottled up inside of me, and i really dont know how much longer i can keep it in. it just hurts so bad wanting to be with someone so bad and loving someone so much and not being able to tell him or know how he would feel about me. i just want to pour out my heart and say everything, but its so hard, the hardest thing in the world. does anyone have any suggestions for me? if u dont know the whole situation just ask me plz... comment, im me whatever. i need advice now more than ever.