hey hey hey hey hey!!!!
Sometimes I open this page out of habit, and then I realize how little I have to say. It's surprising how easily I can give this up now. How easily I can give it all up now. I've resigned myself to the backseat. I don't participate anymore. I just observe and save for a later time. People aren't like how they used to be. I don't know them anymore. It's better just to let them go and I can figure out how to deal with it. I just gotta get over it. And I have to get over that feeling, when I see those people, how instead of thinking more of them, which is what should be going on, I only think less of myself. And instead of being territorial and protective of who and what is mine, I give them up so easily. So easily in fact, I'm ready to let them go without proof that they even want to leave. It's a defense mechanism. Have I given up? Maybe I have. Is that okay? Maybe it is.
But I don't fucking know, I'm just making this all up as I go along.
Sometimes it gets pretty bad. I try to convince myself that it doesn't matter, that none of it matters. And that keeps me okay for the time being. It is dangerous though, when you don't know what DOES matter anymore. It's okay, I'm working around it.
-Hanh
But I don't fucking know, I'm just making this all up as I go along.
Sometimes it gets pretty bad. I try to convince myself that it doesn't matter, that none of it matters. And that keeps me okay for the time being. It is dangerous though, when you don't know what DOES matter anymore. It's okay, I'm working around it.
-Hanh