Everything Goes Dark 3/7
Title: Everything Goes Dark 3/7
Author: yaoi_anti_drug
Beta: ladywilde80, Matt, and Chris
Pairings: Elle/Claire
Overall Pairings: Elle/Eden, Elle/Claire, Sylar/Mohinder, Peter/Sylar, Nathan/Peter, Elle/Adam, and Claire/Peter (unrequited)
Characters: Elle and Claire
Genre: Drama, Angst, Dark Future Fic
Rating: R
Summary: An AU fic based on the Five Years Gone Verse
Word Count: A little over 4,400
Spoilers: Light spoilers for Volumes 1 and 2
Overall Warnings: Violence, Character Death, Sex, Incest (Graphic Only In Chapter 2), Non-Con (Only In Chapter 6)
Notes: Dedicated to slavefaith. And a big thank you to ladywilde80 for helping me with the inspiration and to Matt and Chris for giving me the courage to post! Constructive criticism is always loved and comments, even if it’s to say you hate it, are always appreciated too. Title from "Everything Goes Dark" by The Hoosiers
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, if I did, well...wouldn't Heroes be interesting?
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Everything Goes Dark 3/7:
After re-dedicating herself, Elle found adapting to this new lifestyle quite simple. All it took was an hour of constant news, instilling her with the gravity of present society. It was Hell out in the real world. At least here, in Claire's apartment, she was safe as long as she wasn't careless.
That was where it got tricky. She was more afraid of herself than those around her. Elle was well aware that she was impulsive and could easily unintentionally blow her own cover, especially once she got a job.
What if someone pissed her off and she fried them before she even realized what she was doing? She was so scared that her temper would one day get the best of her.
As prevalent as that fear was on her already distressed mind, she never shared it with her roommate. Claire was much too busy to be bothered by her petty problems.
For about a week, Elle did nothing except stay out of her way, lest she be reprimanded again - her pride couldn't take another assault. She also watched her. Claire was one hard-working girl, more so than Elle had given her credit for.
Her days consisted of an eight hour a day job (though she was often asked for an extension) which left little space for recreational activities. Being a waitress must have been not only time-consuming, but also stressful, because Claire always came home touchy and riled up.
Curious of why it was so difficult and infuriating, she followed Claire to the Burnt Toast Diner. She found her way to an empty table in the corner of the small room, trying to remain out of range so she could observe undetected.
Claire was running around like a damned chicken with its head cut off, trying to please all customers, and some of them were truly nasty. Most of the fussy ones were tourists. Why they came here of all places was beyond her.
There was one woman in specific who was so very particular about her order that it hurt Elle's head to even listen to her.
She was an older woman who wore brightly colored clothes that were way too big for her, large hoop earrings which made her ear lobes droop, and old fashioned jewelry. She demanded that her syrup be heated, her waffles be cooked a certain way, her sausage just so, and she was blaming Claire for each and every tiny error she found - in the food or the restaurant in general.
The most surprising part was that Claire was taking it so calmly. She concluded that Wondergirl must have taken anger management classes because Elle would have killed this woman about fifteen minutes ago.
With the aid of a miracle-working cook, Claire was able to fix the woman's breakfast to her satisfaction. And the bitch didn't even leave a tip! Elle had a mind to track her down herself and make sure she got in a little 'accident' on the way out of the parking lot...
Unfortunately, Elle's revenge plan was promptly thwarted as Claire caught sight of her. She stormed over, name tag shining with the alias of “Sandra”, cheeks red, obviously mortified by being seen ordered around by that terribly dressed old hag. Elle gave her an innocent smile.
“You handled that very well, Claire. I would have electrocuted her,” Elle said.
Claire allowed the slip of her real name to pass, releasing a baffled breath instead. Was Elle actually being nice? Elle just looked at her expectantly, like a puppy in need of praise.
“Thank you?” Claire uttered, unsure of what to say.
Elle beamed.
Okay, right answer then. Claire was beginning to wonder if she had suddenly been trapped in some sort of bizarro world. “What are you doing here?”
Elle shrugged, “I was bored and I wanted to see what you did all day. How do you take all of it?”
Claire could hear the awe in Elle's voice and she felt oddly proud. “It's not always this bad. There's bound to be some bad seeds.”
Elle gazed out the window, spying that bitch. She nodded and looked back to Claire, “Got that right.” As spontaneous as always, Elle suddenly changed gears, “When do you get off?”
“Oh, uh,” she glanced at the clock, “I've got until four.” That was a good six hours away. “Why do you want to know?”
“I thought we could go out. I've been cooped up for a week and you seem to never have any fun...”
“But I've got the early shift tomorrow...”
“See?! That's what I mean. No fun!” Elle stood up and tugged on Claire's shirt sleeve a bit, “Come on! You'll have a good time, I promise.”
The brunette still didn't appear convinced. In response, Elle resorted to her world famous, doe eyed pout.
“Please?” she begged.
Claire sighed, again sparing a glimpse at the clock, “Fine. I'll need to get dressed, so I'll meet you at home. Decide where you want to go.”
Elle gave a small clap as she turned around, pony tail bouncing. She abruptly stopped, pivoting on her heels, “But... I don't know anything about this place. How can I decide where to go?”
“Oh. Right. Well, there is a relatively good dance club a town over. Asylum. We'll go there, alright?”
It was with a very enthusiastic grin that Elle left Claire to suffer through the last hours of her dull shift. Her only diversion from tedious order taking and cleaning was pondering about what a strange girl Elle Bishop was.
------------------------
To put it lightly, the club was very exciting for Elle. The walls themselves blasted music she'd never once had the good fortune to hear. Music that made her feel even more confident in her body, not that she didn't already. And the people were so nice! They all wanted to dance with her, and she would have tried her best to please them all, but she was so distracted.
It was all so colorful and shiny! A room entirely concocted of glitz and glamor. She wanted to touch every flashing light and pounding speaker, as well as every person. Claire had issues keeping Elle under control and out of trouble. The girl had no sense of propriety or modesty; not that the slobbering fools around them minded.
Even so, Claire felt it was her duty to make sure Elle didn't make a mistake she'd later regret, such as sipping from any exposed drinks. Needless to say, she wasn't having the fun Elle had promised her.
In time, Elle noticed her exasperation. It took merely the disappointed expression on her face to cause Elle to become irritated with her own actions, before Claire even had the opportunity to.
“I'm sorry, Claire,” Elle whispered to her in the girl's bathroom, disheartened, “I've never been to a place like this. It's new for me.”
“It's new for me too, you know.” Claire couldn't help but take out her frustration on Elle; justified or not.
“I'll try harder, I swear. Just don't make me go home, please?” Elle seemed to indeed rue Claire's alienation and want to make up for it.
Claire absolutely could not deny Elle when there was such raw emotion in her eyes. She agreed to give her a second chance.
Teeth sparkling white, Elle grabbed her wrist and rushed them both out into the sweat and hormone dripping crowd.
Elle devoted herself to an alteration in attitude after their conversation. She seemed to earnestly want them to have fun together, not individually. It was clearly challenging for her to stay away from all of the swaying bodies that beckoned to be poked and prodded as well as shocked just for a laugh - risks be damned - but she fought the urge for Claire's sake.
The two danced together, luring more than a few suitors. They both got a kick out of putting on a show; playfully touching, laughing, grinding once in a while, and getting so lost in the meaningless, inexplicably sexed up melodies that they even almost kissed once or twice simply to evoke a reaction and hear the boys chortle like idiots, all the while egging them on.
Lips so close to finally touching, to consummating their teasing, but it never occurred. Each close call made Claire's heart thump so much she swore it was audible over the thrum of the rumbling, erratic harmony.
She was worse than their audience!
Honestly, she couldn't pinpoint why the prospect of kissing Elle in full view of an assemblage of young boys and even a couple girls was so enticing, but it was sure as hell more successful at making her head fuzzy than a couple of beers could ever be.
To grasp those hips of Elle's and pull her tight up against her, skin sticky with perspiration and buzzing with impatience, capture her candy-apple lips, bite and nibble and devour her submission... To prove to all those watching just who she was going home with tonight.
It had to be the music. ... And, perhaps, the margaritas she'd somehow been offered by the bartender - it was obvious she was underage, but who was she to turn down a drink? She had watched him make them, so she was certain there were no drugs in them, but a few refills had been enough to intoxicate her into mindless debauchery.
When one of the boys made an effort to usher Claire to the side, Elle got possessive so quickly it was mind-boggling. The blonde grabbed the man's arm and mouthed 'mine' shadowed by a triumphant smirk as she slipped into his place, restraining herself from jolting him for good measure.
Since they did not allow any of the boys get in the middle of their revelry, the night was an unquestionable relief for Claire. It was precisely what Elle promised her it'd be: fun. The most carefree night Claire had experienced in what must have been years.
------------------------
Claire woke up in the morning with a raging headache from both the pulsating rap and techno music and the alcohol she'd consumed. As she chugged down a glass of water with some pills, she knew it had warranted the pain.
It was only when she glanced at the clock that she wondered if she should feel some remorse for staying out until one. She was going to be so late for work. Nonetheless, even when she stood in front of her boss, who scolded her for being nearly an hour late, she still came to the conclusion that it had been totally worth it.
She was in a good mood the rest of the day and it just got better when she spotted Elle in the same seat she'd been spying on her from the day before.
During her break, she readied her notepad as she made her way over to Elle. “Do you want anything? I think I can spare a few dollars to get you a good, healthy dinner.”
“Ohh, you're living dangerously, aren't you?” She laughed, “I'll take some french fries. They smell so good!”
"Not exactly the 'healthy' I had in mine, but..." Claire jotted it down anyways, “You want anything else?”
“Nope. Guess what?"
"What?"
"I got a job today.”
Claire's eyes widened, thrilled at the news, “Really?! Where?!”
“At the club we went to last night. I saw a sign outside the entrance that said they were hiring so I took the bus there this morning and got an application. I still can't believe my good luck, they hired me on the spot!”
Claire bit her lip nervously, “You didn't do anything to... y'know, persuade them, did you?” She didn't truly believe Elle would be so reckless, but she couldn't be certain.
Elle didn't seem offended by the question, she was all too used to being underestimated. She shook her head, “No. They asked me a few questions and then hired me. Said they needed a new face as well as a new flavor for their music. They pay pretty well, even if it's not open every night. I can help pay for the bills and groceries now.”
Claire simpered, “This is great news!”
Elle continued, proud of her accomplishment, “After I get paid, I want to take you out somewhere. To the movies or something, anywhere you want to go.”
Claire hesitated at first, not definite of why, before nodding decisively, "What the hell. It won't hurt. Sure, it sounds like fun to me.”
Claire didn't catch the all too wide grin that enveloped Elle's face, or the shade of red spreading across her cheeks.
------------------------
Claire came to realize that she was genuinely joyous to have Elle as a roommate. They both had jobs; even if the girl didn't get many hours, but they had more than enough to live a comfortable life. Claire still worked herself to the bone, but Elle forced her to take some time each week for herself. And in turn, she wasn't even close to being as stressed as she'd been only a few months ago.
Elle always said “All work and no play makes Claire a dull girl.” Once, Claire had asked her if she'd ever seen the movie that the quote came from and was shocked to be told no.
Immediately that night, they'd rented The Shining and watched it, all the while popping greasy microwave popcorn into their mouths.
Elle had laughed throughout the entire damn movie. At first, it had made Claire uncomfortable, but eventually, Elle's morbid comments got her giggling as well.
Soon, Claire was playing along. “Run, black man, run! Don't you know it's always the nice black guy that gets killed first?!”
Elle had simply rolled with mirth. They'd become so hyped up that they put in another scary movie: The Ring. That one scared the shit out of the both of them and they ended up having to sleep in the same room with the TV turned around so the screen wasn't facing them.
Waking up to Elle's arms hooked around her waist, mouth nuzzling the delicate arc between Claire's neck and shoulder had been unexpected to say the least. It should have freaked her out. Instead, the way she could feel the girl's steady breath on her skin and the security that accompanied such a prison of limbs was curiously lulling.
She lay there for what felt like hours, guiltily taking advantage of Elle's slumbering gravitation to any available heat source before she decided that unless she wanted to endure an awkward morning, she had to disentangle herself from Elle's grip.
It was a difficult task, one that was achieved with the maximum amount of diligence. After all, she didn't want to wake her up.
Elle indubitably lacked any memory of the event. In the morning she was chipper to the point of being bothersome, even if, deep down, Claire found it to be cute. Motivated by her good mood, Elle attempted to make pancakes, but somehow even with the easy to follow recipe right in front of her, she failed disastrously.
The scent of burnt batter refused to flee the kitchen for days.
After their first movie night, it had become a tradition to do it every night that Elle had off. Claire had been amazed to find how many classics the girl had never seen.
She made sure to keep a variation so they wouldn't get bored. Bring It On, 10 Things I Hate About You, The Boondock Saints, Robin Hood: Men In Tights, and Gladiator. The list went on and on.
Some were appreciated, others scorned. They often got into fights, since all Claire showed her were movies she adored. There were two that Elle positively loved though. Kill Bill Vol 1&2 and The Princess Bride. Considering the wholly different topic in the both of them, she was astonished by Elle's tastes.
Other than the introduction to movies, Claire also taught Elle about the wonders of the Internet and illegally downloading music. It was discovered that Elle had about the same fluctuation in her affinity for music as for films. She utilized her expansive library of genres to aid at her job, which was surprisingly going quite well.
Overall, it seemed like any teenager's dream. She was living with their best friend. No parents to bug them, enough money to enjoy themselves; complete with endless amounts of junk food and soda. What was there not to like?
------------------------
Meanwhile, Andy, a coworker, asked Claire out to the movies. Unfortunately, he asked her on a night that she and Elle had decided to go out. Andy was a good guy and all, but she was hesitant about breaking plans with Elle. Yet, Claire didn't want to turn his offer down.
After all, who knew, the date could work out.
Yeah, right. In a perfect world, maybe. In this new era, a special and non-special couple could never make it. Not only that, but it was dangerous. Yet, the desire to feel normal once again was indisputable. Unable to commit herself either way, she told Andy she'd think about it. He looked so crushed, as if she'd denied him, making Claire feel awful.
In an endeavor to figure it all out, she decided to discuss it with Elle.
“What do you think? Should I go on a date with him?”
Elle sat frozen, eyes hard and hands curled into fists on her lap. Claire was taken aback by the reaction. What had she said wrong?
“Elle?”
“But, we have something planned!” Elle burst out.
“Yeah, we do, but we can do it a different night. What's the harm in me going out on a date?” Still searching for a reason behind Elle's peculiar response to the proposition, she inquired deeper, “Is it because you don't have a date of your own?” she grinned, devilish, “Is it because you're jealous?”
Elle crossed her arms, her bottom lip quibbling despite her effort to look strong, “No! I am not jealous...”
“Oh, you are! How cute! Do you want me to find you a boy?” Claire asked sincerely.
“No! I don't care about dating some dumb boy, Claire.” Elle's voice lowered and she became almost shy, though furnished with an edge of fury, unable to look Claire in the eye, “I just don't... I just don't want you to go with him, is all...”
“I don't understand... Why?”
“Just because, okay!? But I can't stop you, can I? So go out with him. I'll stay here. Have fun with your stupid boy toy.” The amount of venom in Elle's voice was unbelievable. The bathroom door slammed as Elle stormed away.
Claire blinked, trying to fully comprehend what the hell was going on. She carefully rapped her knuckles against the door. “Elle?” she asked quietly.
Elle's reply was predictable, “Go away,” but Claire was not put off.
“What did I say wrong? Just tell me, please?”
She heard a bitter laugh as the door suddenly whirled opened, Elle's red brimmed eyes glaring at her, “You really don't get it? You're so blind, cheerleader!”
Yes, Claire didn't see a thing. She didn't discern that Elle's clingy nature was not merely out of friendship. She never noticed any of the longing stares she sent her way. Elle swore she'd made it fairly obvious, but then again, she wasn't particularly well-educated on the appropriate etiquette required for announcing a crush without proclaiming a word on the subject.
At a loss for what to try next, Elle lunged forward and placed a largely unplanned but passionate kiss on Claire's model-perfect, cherry-red lips.
Claire stood there, teetering on her heels, too shocked to push Elle off. Not only that, but the kiss was frankly too good to resist. Although she found it impossible to return at the moment, she was sure as hell savoring it all the same. Pin pricks massaged her legs and arms, leaving her knees undeniably weakened.
Elle pulled away, biting her lip, stomach queasy.
“Oh...” was Claire's enlightened response.
Elle's eyes fell. She wasn't actually used to being turned away, but then again, she wasn't used to caring anymore either. She had thought she'd never again experience these hindering sentiments, not after Eden.
When she'd first started falling for Claire, she'd convinced herself that it was a direct result of Eden's absence. Trying to find a replacement or something equally pathetic. Loneliness created such tricks.
Even with her attempt at Eden's territory - persuasion - the deception of love continued to thrive, becoming more and more irrefutable. Every morning that she put a pot of coffee on for Claire, her gut dropped from the grateful nod that was always accompanied by a dazzling smile as the girl sipped the not too hot, quarter cream and sugar, brown caffeine.
Or how her heart soared when Claire was done with her shower in the evening and walked out, exhausted and near collapse, in her cotton candy blue pajamas to take a seat next to Elle on the couch and watch the designated film.
The way her very presence made Elle's mood spike and brighten.
She couldn't just pretend it was not happening.
The ensuing phase had been the sensation of having betrayed Eden's memory. Once that had sunk in, it had clung like flies to a decaying corpse. That was, until she recalled Eden's words.
“I just want you to be safe and happy, Elle.”
At the time, those words had frightened her, bestowing a sense of foreboding that had hung heavy around her. But currently they were comforting; made her feel as though it was okay to finally move on. Eden wouldn't want her to mourn forever, she'd said that she had wanted her to be safe and happy; unequivocally how she felt around Claire.
Elle could never have conceived her hatred of Claire to melt, but crumbling down the barrier of envy was all it'd veritably taken.
They were together in this war, simply trying to survive and depending on one another to do so. Once she'd realized that, ridding herself of disdain had been unproblematic.
Claire fidgeted a bit, “I'm sorry. I'm just.. not quite sure how to react. I mean...” There was a portion of Claire that said this was wrong. That said the kiss shouldn't have been nearly as pleasurable as it had been. But then the other half of her conscience was considerably rational. This was not setting off alarms in her head for a good reason.
Loving a person of the same sex was not wrong. The gender of the person one fell for was not an issue. Claire had always believed this, even when she'd seen Peter and Nathan; although, that was an entirely different issue due to the two being brothers.
And who was she to comment on the ethics of love? She'd been infatuated with her own Uncle, regardless that the emotion had since faded.
Even with her firm personal belief, she'd never thought about another girl the way Elle was clearly thinking about her.
Sure, she'd had a fling of curiosity with Jackie when they were younger, but that didn't count. Every girl went through that stage, didn't they? She'd read that somewhere.
“It's okay. I get it. It's weird for you. I'm sorry, I should have kept it to myself,” Elle said as she went to lock herself in the bathroom once more.
Claire reached out and stopped the door from closing, looking at Elle kindly, shaking her head, “Don't apologize. You can't help it. And hey, if it helps any, that kiss was awesome.”
The words had spilled from her lips without much thought. Perhaps their minds were on the same track and all it'd taken was coming face to face with the possibility.
Elle grinned, “Really?”
Claire nodded, “Yeah. And that means there's hope. I didn't think of you this way... I mean...I just assumed you were straight...”
Elle cocked her chin out, “I prefer not to be labeled.”
Claire let out a small laugh, glad they'd found a middle ground. It made things less awkward.
“But you said there's hope?” Elle inquired, painfully optimistic.
Claire took the moment to seriously contemplate it. She felt treasured and impervious when she was with Elle, as well as overtly blessed. When she thought about the ingredients it takes for a relationship, those were high on the list. Check, check.
But what about sexually?
Elle was a beautiful girl, and eccentric enough to remain forever interesting. Becoming bored wouldn't be a problem.
She recalled that morning she'd roused to find herself captured in her arms. She had not exactly extracted herself very hastily, now had she? Wrapped in the girl's arms, she had felt so right, tranquil and protected.
And the club... Perhaps her attraction to Elle had not been wholly confined to the realm of inebriation. Maybe it had truly been her all along.
Elle's wide, eager, practically silver eyes were taunting Claire and the ghost of her lips lingered still on her own, slightly swollen mouth, begging for more contact.
And it was then that she was swept up in the reality of the situation.
Claire leaned in close, cocking her head to the side. “It won't hurt to try, right?” She knew this was risky, especially if something went wrong and she broke Elle's heart. Then they'd be in an abundance of trouble, but logical thinking was not driving her anymore; primal instincts had taken its place.
This time, it was Claire who instigated the kiss, tender and straightforward. Elle was the one who pulled away.
“So you won't go out with that guy?” Elle seemed so afraid... This was a side of her that Claire wasn't used to, but she liked the hint of vulnerability, seeing as it left Claire the only one capable of consoling her.
“No. I won't even talk to him if that's what you want,” Claire said.
Elle smiled, nodding a bit, “Yeah, that's what I want.”
“As you wish.”
Chapter Four
Author: yaoi_anti_drug
Beta: ladywilde80, Matt, and Chris
Pairings: Elle/Claire
Overall Pairings: Elle/Eden, Elle/Claire, Sylar/Mohinder, Peter/Sylar, Nathan/Peter, Elle/Adam, and Claire/Peter (unrequited)
Characters: Elle and Claire
Genre: Drama, Angst, Dark Future Fic
Rating: R
Summary: An AU fic based on the Five Years Gone Verse
Word Count: A little over 4,400
Spoilers: Light spoilers for Volumes 1 and 2
Overall Warnings: Violence, Character Death, Sex, Incest (Graphic Only In Chapter 2), Non-Con (Only In Chapter 6)
Notes: Dedicated to slavefaith. And a big thank you to ladywilde80 for helping me with the inspiration and to Matt and Chris for giving me the courage to post! Constructive criticism is always loved and comments, even if it’s to say you hate it, are always appreciated too. Title from "Everything Goes Dark" by The Hoosiers
Disclaimer: I don't own anything, if I did, well...wouldn't Heroes be interesting?
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Everything Goes Dark 3/7:
After re-dedicating herself, Elle found adapting to this new lifestyle quite simple. All it took was an hour of constant news, instilling her with the gravity of present society. It was Hell out in the real world. At least here, in Claire's apartment, she was safe as long as she wasn't careless.
That was where it got tricky. She was more afraid of herself than those around her. Elle was well aware that she was impulsive and could easily unintentionally blow her own cover, especially once she got a job.
What if someone pissed her off and she fried them before she even realized what she was doing? She was so scared that her temper would one day get the best of her.
As prevalent as that fear was on her already distressed mind, she never shared it with her roommate. Claire was much too busy to be bothered by her petty problems.
For about a week, Elle did nothing except stay out of her way, lest she be reprimanded again - her pride couldn't take another assault. She also watched her. Claire was one hard-working girl, more so than Elle had given her credit for.
Her days consisted of an eight hour a day job (though she was often asked for an extension) which left little space for recreational activities. Being a waitress must have been not only time-consuming, but also stressful, because Claire always came home touchy and riled up.
Curious of why it was so difficult and infuriating, she followed Claire to the Burnt Toast Diner. She found her way to an empty table in the corner of the small room, trying to remain out of range so she could observe undetected.
Claire was running around like a damned chicken with its head cut off, trying to please all customers, and some of them were truly nasty. Most of the fussy ones were tourists. Why they came here of all places was beyond her.
There was one woman in specific who was so very particular about her order that it hurt Elle's head to even listen to her.
She was an older woman who wore brightly colored clothes that were way too big for her, large hoop earrings which made her ear lobes droop, and old fashioned jewelry. She demanded that her syrup be heated, her waffles be cooked a certain way, her sausage just so, and she was blaming Claire for each and every tiny error she found - in the food or the restaurant in general.
The most surprising part was that Claire was taking it so calmly. She concluded that Wondergirl must have taken anger management classes because Elle would have killed this woman about fifteen minutes ago.
With the aid of a miracle-working cook, Claire was able to fix the woman's breakfast to her satisfaction. And the bitch didn't even leave a tip! Elle had a mind to track her down herself and make sure she got in a little 'accident' on the way out of the parking lot...
Unfortunately, Elle's revenge plan was promptly thwarted as Claire caught sight of her. She stormed over, name tag shining with the alias of “Sandra”, cheeks red, obviously mortified by being seen ordered around by that terribly dressed old hag. Elle gave her an innocent smile.
“You handled that very well, Claire. I would have electrocuted her,” Elle said.
Claire allowed the slip of her real name to pass, releasing a baffled breath instead. Was Elle actually being nice? Elle just looked at her expectantly, like a puppy in need of praise.
“Thank you?” Claire uttered, unsure of what to say.
Elle beamed.
Okay, right answer then. Claire was beginning to wonder if she had suddenly been trapped in some sort of bizarro world. “What are you doing here?”
Elle shrugged, “I was bored and I wanted to see what you did all day. How do you take all of it?”
Claire could hear the awe in Elle's voice and she felt oddly proud. “It's not always this bad. There's bound to be some bad seeds.”
Elle gazed out the window, spying that bitch. She nodded and looked back to Claire, “Got that right.” As spontaneous as always, Elle suddenly changed gears, “When do you get off?”
“Oh, uh,” she glanced at the clock, “I've got until four.” That was a good six hours away. “Why do you want to know?”
“I thought we could go out. I've been cooped up for a week and you seem to never have any fun...”
“But I've got the early shift tomorrow...”
“See?! That's what I mean. No fun!” Elle stood up and tugged on Claire's shirt sleeve a bit, “Come on! You'll have a good time, I promise.”
The brunette still didn't appear convinced. In response, Elle resorted to her world famous, doe eyed pout.
“Please?” she begged.
Claire sighed, again sparing a glimpse at the clock, “Fine. I'll need to get dressed, so I'll meet you at home. Decide where you want to go.”
Elle gave a small clap as she turned around, pony tail bouncing. She abruptly stopped, pivoting on her heels, “But... I don't know anything about this place. How can I decide where to go?”
“Oh. Right. Well, there is a relatively good dance club a town over. Asylum. We'll go there, alright?”
It was with a very enthusiastic grin that Elle left Claire to suffer through the last hours of her dull shift. Her only diversion from tedious order taking and cleaning was pondering about what a strange girl Elle Bishop was.
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To put it lightly, the club was very exciting for Elle. The walls themselves blasted music she'd never once had the good fortune to hear. Music that made her feel even more confident in her body, not that she didn't already. And the people were so nice! They all wanted to dance with her, and she would have tried her best to please them all, but she was so distracted.
It was all so colorful and shiny! A room entirely concocted of glitz and glamor. She wanted to touch every flashing light and pounding speaker, as well as every person. Claire had issues keeping Elle under control and out of trouble. The girl had no sense of propriety or modesty; not that the slobbering fools around them minded.
Even so, Claire felt it was her duty to make sure Elle didn't make a mistake she'd later regret, such as sipping from any exposed drinks. Needless to say, she wasn't having the fun Elle had promised her.
In time, Elle noticed her exasperation. It took merely the disappointed expression on her face to cause Elle to become irritated with her own actions, before Claire even had the opportunity to.
“I'm sorry, Claire,” Elle whispered to her in the girl's bathroom, disheartened, “I've never been to a place like this. It's new for me.”
“It's new for me too, you know.” Claire couldn't help but take out her frustration on Elle; justified or not.
“I'll try harder, I swear. Just don't make me go home, please?” Elle seemed to indeed rue Claire's alienation and want to make up for it.
Claire absolutely could not deny Elle when there was such raw emotion in her eyes. She agreed to give her a second chance.
Teeth sparkling white, Elle grabbed her wrist and rushed them both out into the sweat and hormone dripping crowd.
Elle devoted herself to an alteration in attitude after their conversation. She seemed to earnestly want them to have fun together, not individually. It was clearly challenging for her to stay away from all of the swaying bodies that beckoned to be poked and prodded as well as shocked just for a laugh - risks be damned - but she fought the urge for Claire's sake.
The two danced together, luring more than a few suitors. They both got a kick out of putting on a show; playfully touching, laughing, grinding once in a while, and getting so lost in the meaningless, inexplicably sexed up melodies that they even almost kissed once or twice simply to evoke a reaction and hear the boys chortle like idiots, all the while egging them on.
Lips so close to finally touching, to consummating their teasing, but it never occurred. Each close call made Claire's heart thump so much she swore it was audible over the thrum of the rumbling, erratic harmony.
She was worse than their audience!
Honestly, she couldn't pinpoint why the prospect of kissing Elle in full view of an assemblage of young boys and even a couple girls was so enticing, but it was sure as hell more successful at making her head fuzzy than a couple of beers could ever be.
To grasp those hips of Elle's and pull her tight up against her, skin sticky with perspiration and buzzing with impatience, capture her candy-apple lips, bite and nibble and devour her submission... To prove to all those watching just who she was going home with tonight.
It had to be the music. ... And, perhaps, the margaritas she'd somehow been offered by the bartender - it was obvious she was underage, but who was she to turn down a drink? She had watched him make them, so she was certain there were no drugs in them, but a few refills had been enough to intoxicate her into mindless debauchery.
When one of the boys made an effort to usher Claire to the side, Elle got possessive so quickly it was mind-boggling. The blonde grabbed the man's arm and mouthed 'mine' shadowed by a triumphant smirk as she slipped into his place, restraining herself from jolting him for good measure.
Since they did not allow any of the boys get in the middle of their revelry, the night was an unquestionable relief for Claire. It was precisely what Elle promised her it'd be: fun. The most carefree night Claire had experienced in what must have been years.
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Claire woke up in the morning with a raging headache from both the pulsating rap and techno music and the alcohol she'd consumed. As she chugged down a glass of water with some pills, she knew it had warranted the pain.
It was only when she glanced at the clock that she wondered if she should feel some remorse for staying out until one. She was going to be so late for work. Nonetheless, even when she stood in front of her boss, who scolded her for being nearly an hour late, she still came to the conclusion that it had been totally worth it.
She was in a good mood the rest of the day and it just got better when she spotted Elle in the same seat she'd been spying on her from the day before.
During her break, she readied her notepad as she made her way over to Elle. “Do you want anything? I think I can spare a few dollars to get you a good, healthy dinner.”
“Ohh, you're living dangerously, aren't you?” She laughed, “I'll take some french fries. They smell so good!”
"Not exactly the 'healthy' I had in mine, but..." Claire jotted it down anyways, “You want anything else?”
“Nope. Guess what?"
"What?"
"I got a job today.”
Claire's eyes widened, thrilled at the news, “Really?! Where?!”
“At the club we went to last night. I saw a sign outside the entrance that said they were hiring so I took the bus there this morning and got an application. I still can't believe my good luck, they hired me on the spot!”
Claire bit her lip nervously, “You didn't do anything to... y'know, persuade them, did you?” She didn't truly believe Elle would be so reckless, but she couldn't be certain.
Elle didn't seem offended by the question, she was all too used to being underestimated. She shook her head, “No. They asked me a few questions and then hired me. Said they needed a new face as well as a new flavor for their music. They pay pretty well, even if it's not open every night. I can help pay for the bills and groceries now.”
Claire simpered, “This is great news!”
Elle continued, proud of her accomplishment, “After I get paid, I want to take you out somewhere. To the movies or something, anywhere you want to go.”
Claire hesitated at first, not definite of why, before nodding decisively, "What the hell. It won't hurt. Sure, it sounds like fun to me.”
Claire didn't catch the all too wide grin that enveloped Elle's face, or the shade of red spreading across her cheeks.
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Claire came to realize that she was genuinely joyous to have Elle as a roommate. They both had jobs; even if the girl didn't get many hours, but they had more than enough to live a comfortable life. Claire still worked herself to the bone, but Elle forced her to take some time each week for herself. And in turn, she wasn't even close to being as stressed as she'd been only a few months ago.
Elle always said “All work and no play makes Claire a dull girl.” Once, Claire had asked her if she'd ever seen the movie that the quote came from and was shocked to be told no.
Immediately that night, they'd rented The Shining and watched it, all the while popping greasy microwave popcorn into their mouths.
Elle had laughed throughout the entire damn movie. At first, it had made Claire uncomfortable, but eventually, Elle's morbid comments got her giggling as well.
Soon, Claire was playing along. “Run, black man, run! Don't you know it's always the nice black guy that gets killed first?!”
Elle had simply rolled with mirth. They'd become so hyped up that they put in another scary movie: The Ring. That one scared the shit out of the both of them and they ended up having to sleep in the same room with the TV turned around so the screen wasn't facing them.
Waking up to Elle's arms hooked around her waist, mouth nuzzling the delicate arc between Claire's neck and shoulder had been unexpected to say the least. It should have freaked her out. Instead, the way she could feel the girl's steady breath on her skin and the security that accompanied such a prison of limbs was curiously lulling.
She lay there for what felt like hours, guiltily taking advantage of Elle's slumbering gravitation to any available heat source before she decided that unless she wanted to endure an awkward morning, she had to disentangle herself from Elle's grip.
It was a difficult task, one that was achieved with the maximum amount of diligence. After all, she didn't want to wake her up.
Elle indubitably lacked any memory of the event. In the morning she was chipper to the point of being bothersome, even if, deep down, Claire found it to be cute. Motivated by her good mood, Elle attempted to make pancakes, but somehow even with the easy to follow recipe right in front of her, she failed disastrously.
The scent of burnt batter refused to flee the kitchen for days.
After their first movie night, it had become a tradition to do it every night that Elle had off. Claire had been amazed to find how many classics the girl had never seen.
She made sure to keep a variation so they wouldn't get bored. Bring It On, 10 Things I Hate About You, The Boondock Saints, Robin Hood: Men In Tights, and Gladiator. The list went on and on.
Some were appreciated, others scorned. They often got into fights, since all Claire showed her were movies she adored. There were two that Elle positively loved though. Kill Bill Vol 1&2 and The Princess Bride. Considering the wholly different topic in the both of them, she was astonished by Elle's tastes.
Other than the introduction to movies, Claire also taught Elle about the wonders of the Internet and illegally downloading music. It was discovered that Elle had about the same fluctuation in her affinity for music as for films. She utilized her expansive library of genres to aid at her job, which was surprisingly going quite well.
Overall, it seemed like any teenager's dream. She was living with their best friend. No parents to bug them, enough money to enjoy themselves; complete with endless amounts of junk food and soda. What was there not to like?
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Meanwhile, Andy, a coworker, asked Claire out to the movies. Unfortunately, he asked her on a night that she and Elle had decided to go out. Andy was a good guy and all, but she was hesitant about breaking plans with Elle. Yet, Claire didn't want to turn his offer down.
After all, who knew, the date could work out.
Yeah, right. In a perfect world, maybe. In this new era, a special and non-special couple could never make it. Not only that, but it was dangerous. Yet, the desire to feel normal once again was indisputable. Unable to commit herself either way, she told Andy she'd think about it. He looked so crushed, as if she'd denied him, making Claire feel awful.
In an endeavor to figure it all out, she decided to discuss it with Elle.
“What do you think? Should I go on a date with him?”
Elle sat frozen, eyes hard and hands curled into fists on her lap. Claire was taken aback by the reaction. What had she said wrong?
“Elle?”
“But, we have something planned!” Elle burst out.
“Yeah, we do, but we can do it a different night. What's the harm in me going out on a date?” Still searching for a reason behind Elle's peculiar response to the proposition, she inquired deeper, “Is it because you don't have a date of your own?” she grinned, devilish, “Is it because you're jealous?”
Elle crossed her arms, her bottom lip quibbling despite her effort to look strong, “No! I am not jealous...”
“Oh, you are! How cute! Do you want me to find you a boy?” Claire asked sincerely.
“No! I don't care about dating some dumb boy, Claire.” Elle's voice lowered and she became almost shy, though furnished with an edge of fury, unable to look Claire in the eye, “I just don't... I just don't want you to go with him, is all...”
“I don't understand... Why?”
“Just because, okay!? But I can't stop you, can I? So go out with him. I'll stay here. Have fun with your stupid boy toy.” The amount of venom in Elle's voice was unbelievable. The bathroom door slammed as Elle stormed away.
Claire blinked, trying to fully comprehend what the hell was going on. She carefully rapped her knuckles against the door. “Elle?” she asked quietly.
Elle's reply was predictable, “Go away,” but Claire was not put off.
“What did I say wrong? Just tell me, please?”
She heard a bitter laugh as the door suddenly whirled opened, Elle's red brimmed eyes glaring at her, “You really don't get it? You're so blind, cheerleader!”
Yes, Claire didn't see a thing. She didn't discern that Elle's clingy nature was not merely out of friendship. She never noticed any of the longing stares she sent her way. Elle swore she'd made it fairly obvious, but then again, she wasn't particularly well-educated on the appropriate etiquette required for announcing a crush without proclaiming a word on the subject.
At a loss for what to try next, Elle lunged forward and placed a largely unplanned but passionate kiss on Claire's model-perfect, cherry-red lips.
Claire stood there, teetering on her heels, too shocked to push Elle off. Not only that, but the kiss was frankly too good to resist. Although she found it impossible to return at the moment, she was sure as hell savoring it all the same. Pin pricks massaged her legs and arms, leaving her knees undeniably weakened.
Elle pulled away, biting her lip, stomach queasy.
“Oh...” was Claire's enlightened response.
Elle's eyes fell. She wasn't actually used to being turned away, but then again, she wasn't used to caring anymore either. She had thought she'd never again experience these hindering sentiments, not after Eden.
When she'd first started falling for Claire, she'd convinced herself that it was a direct result of Eden's absence. Trying to find a replacement or something equally pathetic. Loneliness created such tricks.
Even with her attempt at Eden's territory - persuasion - the deception of love continued to thrive, becoming more and more irrefutable. Every morning that she put a pot of coffee on for Claire, her gut dropped from the grateful nod that was always accompanied by a dazzling smile as the girl sipped the not too hot, quarter cream and sugar, brown caffeine.
Or how her heart soared when Claire was done with her shower in the evening and walked out, exhausted and near collapse, in her cotton candy blue pajamas to take a seat next to Elle on the couch and watch the designated film.
The way her very presence made Elle's mood spike and brighten.
She couldn't just pretend it was not happening.
The ensuing phase had been the sensation of having betrayed Eden's memory. Once that had sunk in, it had clung like flies to a decaying corpse. That was, until she recalled Eden's words.
“I just want you to be safe and happy, Elle.”
At the time, those words had frightened her, bestowing a sense of foreboding that had hung heavy around her. But currently they were comforting; made her feel as though it was okay to finally move on. Eden wouldn't want her to mourn forever, she'd said that she had wanted her to be safe and happy; unequivocally how she felt around Claire.
Elle could never have conceived her hatred of Claire to melt, but crumbling down the barrier of envy was all it'd veritably taken.
They were together in this war, simply trying to survive and depending on one another to do so. Once she'd realized that, ridding herself of disdain had been unproblematic.
Claire fidgeted a bit, “I'm sorry. I'm just.. not quite sure how to react. I mean...” There was a portion of Claire that said this was wrong. That said the kiss shouldn't have been nearly as pleasurable as it had been. But then the other half of her conscience was considerably rational. This was not setting off alarms in her head for a good reason.
Loving a person of the same sex was not wrong. The gender of the person one fell for was not an issue. Claire had always believed this, even when she'd seen Peter and Nathan; although, that was an entirely different issue due to the two being brothers.
And who was she to comment on the ethics of love? She'd been infatuated with her own Uncle, regardless that the emotion had since faded.
Even with her firm personal belief, she'd never thought about another girl the way Elle was clearly thinking about her.
Sure, she'd had a fling of curiosity with Jackie when they were younger, but that didn't count. Every girl went through that stage, didn't they? She'd read that somewhere.
“It's okay. I get it. It's weird for you. I'm sorry, I should have kept it to myself,” Elle said as she went to lock herself in the bathroom once more.
Claire reached out and stopped the door from closing, looking at Elle kindly, shaking her head, “Don't apologize. You can't help it. And hey, if it helps any, that kiss was awesome.”
The words had spilled from her lips without much thought. Perhaps their minds were on the same track and all it'd taken was coming face to face with the possibility.
Elle grinned, “Really?”
Claire nodded, “Yeah. And that means there's hope. I didn't think of you this way... I mean...I just assumed you were straight...”
Elle cocked her chin out, “I prefer not to be labeled.”
Claire let out a small laugh, glad they'd found a middle ground. It made things less awkward.
“But you said there's hope?” Elle inquired, painfully optimistic.
Claire took the moment to seriously contemplate it. She felt treasured and impervious when she was with Elle, as well as overtly blessed. When she thought about the ingredients it takes for a relationship, those were high on the list. Check, check.
But what about sexually?
Elle was a beautiful girl, and eccentric enough to remain forever interesting. Becoming bored wouldn't be a problem.
She recalled that morning she'd roused to find herself captured in her arms. She had not exactly extracted herself very hastily, now had she? Wrapped in the girl's arms, she had felt so right, tranquil and protected.
And the club... Perhaps her attraction to Elle had not been wholly confined to the realm of inebriation. Maybe it had truly been her all along.
Elle's wide, eager, practically silver eyes were taunting Claire and the ghost of her lips lingered still on her own, slightly swollen mouth, begging for more contact.
And it was then that she was swept up in the reality of the situation.
Claire leaned in close, cocking her head to the side. “It won't hurt to try, right?” She knew this was risky, especially if something went wrong and she broke Elle's heart. Then they'd be in an abundance of trouble, but logical thinking was not driving her anymore; primal instincts had taken its place.
This time, it was Claire who instigated the kiss, tender and straightforward. Elle was the one who pulled away.
“So you won't go out with that guy?” Elle seemed so afraid... This was a side of her that Claire wasn't used to, but she liked the hint of vulnerability, seeing as it left Claire the only one capable of consoling her.
“No. I won't even talk to him if that's what you want,” Claire said.
Elle smiled, nodding a bit, “Yeah, that's what I want.”
“As you wish.”
Chapter Four