(no subject)
it seems that in life, the more importance you put into something,
or the more you rely on a specific person or thing, the more likely
it is for you to lose that thing that means the world to you. i
think that if people really honestly don't want to get hurt anymore,
they really would just stop caring so much about things. for the past
nine months, i've built my life around one person. i cared for this
person, i loved this person, i wanted to get married and have a kid
with this person. she became my life and when she left me i just
snapped... i stopped being able to think straight and i just lost
everything that was my day to day life. when she left, she took
everything with her... i don't feel like i will ever be the same
person ever again, which is a shame; that was the first time in my
life that i actually liked myself. i know i'm not a writer, and i
know that anybody who reads this will be able to tell that, but i
really just needed to write this down somewhere, and i almost want
people to read it. i really don't know why i want people to know
that i'm a weak individual who just "gives up when he gets dumped."
i don't know why really, i guess that i think that someone who reads
this might give a damn about me and may actually have some sort of
encouraging words to say to me or something like that. i don't pray
or anything, but i really do hope that there's someone out there who
cares about me... i just feel like everything about me is worthless.
am i worthless?
or the more you rely on a specific person or thing, the more likely
it is for you to lose that thing that means the world to you. i
think that if people really honestly don't want to get hurt anymore,
they really would just stop caring so much about things. for the past
nine months, i've built my life around one person. i cared for this
person, i loved this person, i wanted to get married and have a kid
with this person. she became my life and when she left me i just
snapped... i stopped being able to think straight and i just lost
everything that was my day to day life. when she left, she took
everything with her... i don't feel like i will ever be the same
person ever again, which is a shame; that was the first time in my
life that i actually liked myself. i know i'm not a writer, and i
know that anybody who reads this will be able to tell that, but i
really just needed to write this down somewhere, and i almost want
people to read it. i really don't know why i want people to know
that i'm a weak individual who just "gives up when he gets dumped."
i don't know why really, i guess that i think that someone who reads
this might give a damn about me and may actually have some sort of
encouraging words to say to me or something like that. i don't pray
or anything, but i really do hope that there's someone out there who
cares about me... i just feel like everything about me is worthless.
am i worthless?