Mike Dexter Could Care Less
Full Title: Mike Dexter is a God, Mike Dexter is a Role Model, Mike Dexter is an Asshole, Mike Dexter Could Care Less
Fandom: Can't Hardly Wait
Rating: PG-13 due to language.
Genre: Friendship
Summary: The end of the movie told through Mike's eyes. Oneshot.
Author's Note: I wrote this a while back, but only recently I realized it's not up here. So, enjoy.
Mike Dexter Could Care Less
My head was pounding as I slowly opened my eyes. The noises around me were too loud, the image a blur. I swear, no matter how many times I drink, I will never get used to having hangovers. I blinked a few times. Metal bars... a jail cell? Crap! What happened last night?
My head went over the events that occurred. Lemme see... Amanda rejected me, someone called me a fag, William comforted me... William! That's right.. the police came... The police! Oh God, I'm in jail aren't I? Me an' Will ran to the back of the pool-house then... nothing.
I gradually sat up, the palm of my hand rubbing my pounding temple. I felt like crap.
“Finally awake, kid?” said a police officer, opening the screeching cell door. I screwed my eyes shut then opened again.
“That's why ya shouldn't drink at your age. Hangovers are the worst at your age. C'mon, son, we need a statement before we fine you two,” the policeman helped me to my feet. I was suddenly aware that William was lying not too far from where I was. He was still unconscious.
Looking at his face, a foreign wave of guilt washed over me. I never felt guilty. For four years I tormented him, now all I wanted to do was protect him. It was a strange feeling. For years I laughed at him, but tonight we were... friends.
I must be really hungover I thought to myself as I was lead out of the cell. The door screeching as it was closed behind us. They seriously needed to put some oil on that thing.
I was lead into a small cube-like room, another official was sitting at the rectangle table in the center. She looked up at me and told me to take a seat. I did so without complaint. My head hurt too much to be able to recall any details about the woman; she was old, that was all I remembered.
The woman told me Will and I were found behind the pool-house... undressed. My ears got warmer than usual. She took down notes as she asked me simple questions, “Were you drinking at this party?”
I wanted to smack her. No shit I was drinking! Why do you think I'm hungover? Oh God, my head...
Then she asked about Will, “Was he drinking also?”
That urge to protect my new friend kicked in. I knew that if I told them that he willingly got drunk, he'd get into trouble. Measures were taken, “I did that to him.”
The woman looked up in surprise.
“I beat him up and made him drink until he passed out. I took his his clothes off. After that, I guess I must've passed out too.”
The woman nodded and informed me that I could either go to jail for underage drinking or pay a fine. I went the fine way.
“What's going to happen to Will?” I asked, when she stood up.
“His parents will be called and informed of the situation. You, however will be sent straight home. Your parents will also be informed of what you have been doing.”
I nodded, too dizzy to make a smart remark. I thought of my dad, how proud he would be of the the lie I had told. He'd gladly pay the fine for me. My mother would be be all over me, telling me to get some rest, then yell at me later how irresponsible I was. It wasn't the first time they'd caught me drinking or hungover.
The policeman who woke me drove me home. I checked my watch; it was 4:30 in the morning. I eagerly awaited for my warm pillow.
When I arrived home, and just as I thought, my mother was worried about my health more than anything else. She made sure I went straight to bed. The one thing I hoped my friends never found out... I was a bit of a mama's boy; although I hated to admit it.
I lay in bed, barely listening to the policeman telling my parents what I told them. I heard my dad's booming laughter when he mentioned the 'forcing Will to drink part'. I turned onto my side, not wanting to listen anymore.
Rubbing my temple again, I wondered about Will's relationship with his parents. They were probably proud of their son, he (usually) never drank, smoked, did drugs, or got into trouble. That's the son every parent dreams of... the only thing he missed was a girlfriend.
Maybe that's why I always teased him; because he was smarter than me. But he wasn't all bad. He's a good kid, I thought. I wanted to thank him next time I see him.
Maybe college sex wasn't all I thought it was... but at least I had the summer. Maybe I could still get women... I fell asleep on the thought.
My head didn't hurt so much as it did earlier this morning. I changed into the clothes I wore yesterday, then headed for the door. I had told the guys that I would meet them for breakfast.
It was almost 10:00 and my parents were still asleep. Good, I didn't want to talk to them now.
Luckily, my pals didn't know about my being caught by the cops. The resentment I felt for my friends yesterday was completely gone. As I took a bite of syrup-covered waffle, I decided to tease them.
“Tonight, I'm gonna be at some bar with chicks all over me. And you guys are gonna be at home with your lame-ass girlfriends.”
I nodded as they began deliberating about breaking up with their girlfriends again. I didn't notice who entered the diner until he was standing right next to me and talking. I looked up, it was William.
“I never got a chance to thank you for covering for me last night,” he said.
I cussed to myself, sure I wanted to say 'thank you for last night' but not in front of my friends!
“Thanks for telling the cops all that stuff...”
I flashed a glance at the guys, who had looks of confusion on their faces.
Shut up! You're ruining my reputation! I thought.
“I don't think I'm gonna be drinking like that for a while.”
Make him shut his mouth! I yelled at myself. Screw it, no more 'thank you' for him.
“That stuff you said-” that's when he moved to sit next to me.
“Whoa, whoa!”My arm slammed out, blocking his way, “Who said you could sit with us, geek?”
“Shouldn't you be home playing with your computer?” remarked one of my pals.
“Yeah, why don't you go home, watch "Star Trek," Urkel?” I grinned, pushing his face away.
My friends and I exchanged a few more cruel nerd jokes. William walked away and I could care less. He was a nerd in school, he'll be a nerd forever. I befriended him last night was because I was sad and drunk. We was nice to me, so I bailed him out. We were even, there was no more need to be friends.
He shot me a hurt look before he walked out of the diner. All I did in return was laugh. I haven't seen him since, and I don't care.
Fandom: Can't Hardly Wait
Rating: PG-13 due to language.
Genre: Friendship
Summary: The end of the movie told through Mike's eyes. Oneshot.
Author's Note: I wrote this a while back, but only recently I realized it's not up here. So, enjoy.
Mike Dexter Could Care Less
My head was pounding as I slowly opened my eyes. The noises around me were too loud, the image a blur. I swear, no matter how many times I drink, I will never get used to having hangovers. I blinked a few times. Metal bars... a jail cell? Crap! What happened last night?
My head went over the events that occurred. Lemme see... Amanda rejected me, someone called me a fag, William comforted me... William! That's right.. the police came... The police! Oh God, I'm in jail aren't I? Me an' Will ran to the back of the pool-house then... nothing.
I gradually sat up, the palm of my hand rubbing my pounding temple. I felt like crap.
“Finally awake, kid?” said a police officer, opening the screeching cell door. I screwed my eyes shut then opened again.
“That's why ya shouldn't drink at your age. Hangovers are the worst at your age. C'mon, son, we need a statement before we fine you two,” the policeman helped me to my feet. I was suddenly aware that William was lying not too far from where I was. He was still unconscious.
Looking at his face, a foreign wave of guilt washed over me. I never felt guilty. For four years I tormented him, now all I wanted to do was protect him. It was a strange feeling. For years I laughed at him, but tonight we were... friends.
I must be really hungover I thought to myself as I was lead out of the cell. The door screeching as it was closed behind us. They seriously needed to put some oil on that thing.
I was lead into a small cube-like room, another official was sitting at the rectangle table in the center. She looked up at me and told me to take a seat. I did so without complaint. My head hurt too much to be able to recall any details about the woman; she was old, that was all I remembered.
The woman told me Will and I were found behind the pool-house... undressed. My ears got warmer than usual. She took down notes as she asked me simple questions, “Were you drinking at this party?”
I wanted to smack her. No shit I was drinking! Why do you think I'm hungover? Oh God, my head...
Then she asked about Will, “Was he drinking also?”
That urge to protect my new friend kicked in. I knew that if I told them that he willingly got drunk, he'd get into trouble. Measures were taken, “I did that to him.”
The woman looked up in surprise.
“I beat him up and made him drink until he passed out. I took his his clothes off. After that, I guess I must've passed out too.”
The woman nodded and informed me that I could either go to jail for underage drinking or pay a fine. I went the fine way.
“What's going to happen to Will?” I asked, when she stood up.
“His parents will be called and informed of the situation. You, however will be sent straight home. Your parents will also be informed of what you have been doing.”
I nodded, too dizzy to make a smart remark. I thought of my dad, how proud he would be of the the lie I had told. He'd gladly pay the fine for me. My mother would be be all over me, telling me to get some rest, then yell at me later how irresponsible I was. It wasn't the first time they'd caught me drinking or hungover.
The policeman who woke me drove me home. I checked my watch; it was 4:30 in the morning. I eagerly awaited for my warm pillow.
When I arrived home, and just as I thought, my mother was worried about my health more than anything else. She made sure I went straight to bed. The one thing I hoped my friends never found out... I was a bit of a mama's boy; although I hated to admit it.
I lay in bed, barely listening to the policeman telling my parents what I told them. I heard my dad's booming laughter when he mentioned the 'forcing Will to drink part'. I turned onto my side, not wanting to listen anymore.
Rubbing my temple again, I wondered about Will's relationship with his parents. They were probably proud of their son, he (usually) never drank, smoked, did drugs, or got into trouble. That's the son every parent dreams of... the only thing he missed was a girlfriend.
Maybe that's why I always teased him; because he was smarter than me. But he wasn't all bad. He's a good kid, I thought. I wanted to thank him next time I see him.
Maybe college sex wasn't all I thought it was... but at least I had the summer. Maybe I could still get women... I fell asleep on the thought.
My head didn't hurt so much as it did earlier this morning. I changed into the clothes I wore yesterday, then headed for the door. I had told the guys that I would meet them for breakfast.
It was almost 10:00 and my parents were still asleep. Good, I didn't want to talk to them now.
Luckily, my pals didn't know about my being caught by the cops. The resentment I felt for my friends yesterday was completely gone. As I took a bite of syrup-covered waffle, I decided to tease them.
“Tonight, I'm gonna be at some bar with chicks all over me. And you guys are gonna be at home with your lame-ass girlfriends.”
I nodded as they began deliberating about breaking up with their girlfriends again. I didn't notice who entered the diner until he was standing right next to me and talking. I looked up, it was William.
“I never got a chance to thank you for covering for me last night,” he said.
I cussed to myself, sure I wanted to say 'thank you for last night' but not in front of my friends!
“Thanks for telling the cops all that stuff...”
I flashed a glance at the guys, who had looks of confusion on their faces.
Shut up! You're ruining my reputation! I thought.
“I don't think I'm gonna be drinking like that for a while.”
Make him shut his mouth! I yelled at myself. Screw it, no more 'thank you' for him.
“That stuff you said-” that's when he moved to sit next to me.
“Whoa, whoa!”My arm slammed out, blocking his way, “Who said you could sit with us, geek?”
“Shouldn't you be home playing with your computer?” remarked one of my pals.
“Yeah, why don't you go home, watch "Star Trek," Urkel?” I grinned, pushing his face away.
My friends and I exchanged a few more cruel nerd jokes. William walked away and I could care less. He was a nerd in school, he'll be a nerd forever. I befriended him last night was because I was sad and drunk. We was nice to me, so I bailed him out. We were even, there was no more need to be friends.
He shot me a hurt look before he walked out of the diner. All I did in return was laugh. I haven't seen him since, and I don't care.