Son of the Mask review
Spoilers!! Omg, I can't believe I just watched this movie...
Dear Odin, how in Asgard do I start? I guess I might as well start off my saying this: I've adored the first movie to pieces since I was a kid and I only even remotely wanted to watch the sequel because of (obviously) Alan Cumming. I heard from other AC fans recommending that he's worth seeing in it if you're a fan of his. I admit, they were right about that. I heard so much shit about this movie, and from the trailers, so I've avoided it for six years. It took only one awesome actor to get me to break and watch it. Oh, and dear Alan Cumming...
The Good: There's less good, so I'll put it first. Alan Cumming. That's it. He was the only really enjoyable thing about this movie. I guess I'll admit that I liked the idea of the dog trying to kill the baby. But seriously, I came for Alan Cumming. I stayed for Alan Cumming and the majority of brownie points this movie gets (which aren't many) are for Alan Cumming.
But seriously though, what were the writers thinking when they wrote the script for this?
The Bad: Brace yourself. To put it simply and excluding our dear Alan... the dialogue was terrible, the effects were cheap, the jokes were either stupid or made me cry inside because they were badly redone from the first film, the characters were uninteresting, the acting was crap, the baby was freaking creepy, things that actually should have been realistic were not, things that should have been ridiculous and cartoon-like were already done in the first or were ridiculously stupid, and Jamie Kennedy with the mask on made me want to shoot myself in the head.
I'll break down and explain the things that bothered me about this movie. I'll explain why such things were crap.
First of all: The dialogue... yeah, if you listen to it, it can pretty much speak for itself.
Second: The effects. Okay, this actually doesn't bother me too much because I've seen a hell of a lot worse on the Syfy channel. I guess I could cross this off the list because effects people work with what they can get with the budget that they have... which they probably blew on hiring Alan Cumming.
Third: The jokes. My Odin, the jokes. Whether it be the physical jokes (like the nosy neighbor or the peeing frenzy that that fuckin' baby has) or the dialogue jokes ("That's why it can pee like that" or whatever came out of Kutner from House's mouth), the jokes were stupid, flat, gross, unnecessary, or just plain did not belong. Now, I should admit, a few -a very few- jokes did make me smile, but I'll get to that later.
Now one of the most important things that made the first one awesome (and I will mention this again) is Jim Carrey. Carrey brought the humor the film. His jokes could not be done by anyone other than him; he was perfectly cast. Hell, the story was originally going to be a horror story, but when Carrey came along, it all changed. Thankfully too because Carrey is my favorite thing about that movie. Now in "Son of..." Carrey was absent, so any recurring jokes they brought back fell flat on their face. For example the "Do you feel lucky punk?" joke was done so brilliantly the the first one and wanted to smash something when they tried and failed at trying to redo the joke. It just didn't work.
Moving on, four: The characters. I didn't a shit about this childish man and emotionless wife who end up having a demonic baby. I really don't. And none of the supporting characters caught my attention either. At the end of the movie, I fucking wanted Loki to kick Tim's ass, but nooooo the main character has to triumph.
Fifth: The acting. The wife, the artist guy in charge, and somebody else who I'll get to now instead of later: Jamie Kennedy. Now in all, Kennedy wasn't as bad as everyone else... that is, until he put the mask on. Gawd, why? I frikken fastforwarded through his little musical number, I couldn't stand him! He was so BLAH! Carrey had it, Carrey showed more emotion with the mask than this whole movie put together! Seriously, whenever Tim put on the mask I had to remind myself of why the flying fuck I was watching this movie. Alan Cumming...
I'll move onto the title character, the son of the mask himself... the Baby. *cue dramatic music* My Gawd, that baby was so sketchy! Yeah, sure it could be cute, and it was... up until it said "Mother." Ye gads! My own eyes nearly boggled out of my head. The baby was trying to throw his dad into a fucking asylum! What sort of twisted infant is this? Gawd, I feel like I might as well be watching "Baby Geniuses"! *shudders at the thought* Seriously, that baby had more urine in its system than a sewer. That I found was probably the grossest and unnecessary scene ever in this whole movie. But seriously! This BABY! This baby nearly kills the flipping dog! If I ever give birth to a baby like that I'll tell the doctors and nurses to kill it on the spot. That baby did a whole EXORCIST THING! DEMON BABY!!! Ugh gawd... that baby...
This was a bad movie, I'm really not going to deny that. It's definitely on my top list of the worst movies I have ever seen. Yeah it's up there with Troll 2, Click, and Shark Attack: Megalodon. However... this movie had what the others didn't: Alan Fucking Cumming. And don't give me that "Yeah well John Barrowman was in Shark Attack"; yeah, well he couldn't save that shitty movie. Hey, all actors have at least one bad bad movie in their career, and this was definately Alan's. But Alan himself was so worth watching this movie for.
Loki, Loki, Loki... dammit Loki stop lookin' so fine in your leather pants & cape! You and your sleek car, dopey-but-cute hair, your love for beaches and causing mishap, and you... being Alan Fucking Cumming.
NO! Wrong Loki dammit!!!!
That's better!! <3
Now, there's one thing that seems to bother a lot of mythology peeps out there about this movie which really didn't bother me at all, and that is the Norse mythology of it. Now I love in general that they had Loki in this sequel. I remember talking to my sister after watching the first one (for the millionth time) before "Son of" came out and I thought then that Loki meeting Stanley Ipkiss would be an awesome story to see. Of course, Jim Carrey dropped out and this monstrosity was born. T_T I still like the idea of Stanley meeting Loki in confrontation and I have a fanfic idea already which I may someday get around to writing. I think it would be a good fic for those who love the original, hated the sequel, but loved Loki. You know, scrap "Son of" and write my own sequel as it were. But oh, how I digress!
So Norse mythology peeps always argue that Loki wasn't Odin's son but his bloodbrother or something like that. I unfortunately haven't studied much to any Norse mythology (to my dismay and anger towards Gilgamesh), so I wouldn't really think about it. Now what surprises me is that in "Thor," Loki is the spoilersadoptedspoilers son of Odin and I haven't heard any complaints about that. Now I never read the Thor comics so I don't know if that's the way it was in the comics or whatever. But seriously, Nose mythology peeps? It's a flipping movie. It sucks anyway, let it enjoy someting that actually didn't look horrid as a plot point. Yeah, I liked the whole "Odin wants Loki to be more like his awesome hunky son Thor, so he makes him find the darn mask" plot. Before "Thor" and "Son of", Loki was my favorite Norse god. Just the idea of a god being the ruler of something that is more of an idea than a physical thing: mischief. But, starting to digress away from the movie here, I'll give my final analysis.
Was this movie good? No. Is it the worst film ever made? No. Do I recommend it? Only to Alan Cumming fans and kids, because while the older fans come for Cumming, the kids can enjoy the childish humor that adults probably wouldn't like. Would I ever watch it again? Yes, because I enjoyed Alan so much that I would rewatch it if it meant watching him play Loki. I'd probably skip all the other scenes, but you get my point. If you hate this movie, I can see why; but if you like it, then good for you. I don't think this is great movie, but I've seen worse and I think that's saying something.
Dear Odin, how in Asgard do I start? I guess I might as well start off my saying this: I've adored the first movie to pieces since I was a kid and I only even remotely wanted to watch the sequel because of (obviously) Alan Cumming. I heard from other AC fans recommending that he's worth seeing in it if you're a fan of his. I admit, they were right about that. I heard so much shit about this movie, and from the trailers, so I've avoided it for six years. It took only one awesome actor to get me to break and watch it. Oh, and dear Alan Cumming...
The Good: There's less good, so I'll put it first. Alan Cumming. That's it. He was the only really enjoyable thing about this movie. I guess I'll admit that I liked the idea of the dog trying to kill the baby. But seriously, I came for Alan Cumming. I stayed for Alan Cumming and the majority of brownie points this movie gets (which aren't many) are for Alan Cumming.
But seriously though, what were the writers thinking when they wrote the script for this?
The Bad: Brace yourself. To put it simply and excluding our dear Alan... the dialogue was terrible, the effects were cheap, the jokes were either stupid or made me cry inside because they were badly redone from the first film, the characters were uninteresting, the acting was crap, the baby was freaking creepy, things that actually should have been realistic were not, things that should have been ridiculous and cartoon-like were already done in the first or were ridiculously stupid, and Jamie Kennedy with the mask on made me want to shoot myself in the head.
I'll break down and explain the things that bothered me about this movie. I'll explain why such things were crap.
First of all: The dialogue... yeah, if you listen to it, it can pretty much speak for itself.
Second: The effects. Okay, this actually doesn't bother me too much because I've seen a hell of a lot worse on the Syfy channel. I guess I could cross this off the list because effects people work with what they can get with the budget that they have... which they probably blew on hiring Alan Cumming.
Third: The jokes. My Odin, the jokes. Whether it be the physical jokes (like the nosy neighbor or the peeing frenzy that that fuckin' baby has) or the dialogue jokes ("That's why it can pee like that" or whatever came out of Kutner from House's mouth), the jokes were stupid, flat, gross, unnecessary, or just plain did not belong. Now, I should admit, a few -a very few- jokes did make me smile, but I'll get to that later.
Now one of the most important things that made the first one awesome (and I will mention this again) is Jim Carrey. Carrey brought the humor the film. His jokes could not be done by anyone other than him; he was perfectly cast. Hell, the story was originally going to be a horror story, but when Carrey came along, it all changed. Thankfully too because Carrey is my favorite thing about that movie. Now in "Son of..." Carrey was absent, so any recurring jokes they brought back fell flat on their face. For example the "Do you feel lucky punk?" joke was done so brilliantly the the first one and wanted to smash something when they tried and failed at trying to redo the joke. It just didn't work.
Moving on, four: The characters. I didn't a shit about this childish man and emotionless wife who end up having a demonic baby. I really don't. And none of the supporting characters caught my attention either. At the end of the movie, I fucking wanted Loki to kick Tim's ass, but nooooo the main character has to triumph.
Fifth: The acting. The wife, the artist guy in charge, and somebody else who I'll get to now instead of later: Jamie Kennedy. Now in all, Kennedy wasn't as bad as everyone else... that is, until he put the mask on. Gawd, why? I frikken fastforwarded through his little musical number, I couldn't stand him! He was so BLAH! Carrey had it, Carrey showed more emotion with the mask than this whole movie put together! Seriously, whenever Tim put on the mask I had to remind myself of why the flying fuck I was watching this movie. Alan Cumming...
I'll move onto the title character, the son of the mask himself... the Baby. *cue dramatic music* My Gawd, that baby was so sketchy! Yeah, sure it could be cute, and it was... up until it said "Mother." Ye gads! My own eyes nearly boggled out of my head. The baby was trying to throw his dad into a fucking asylum! What sort of twisted infant is this? Gawd, I feel like I might as well be watching "Baby Geniuses"! *shudders at the thought* Seriously, that baby had more urine in its system than a sewer. That I found was probably the grossest and unnecessary scene ever in this whole movie. But seriously! This BABY! This baby nearly kills the flipping dog! If I ever give birth to a baby like that I'll tell the doctors and nurses to kill it on the spot. That baby did a whole EXORCIST THING! DEMON BABY!!! Ugh gawd... that baby...
This was a bad movie, I'm really not going to deny that. It's definitely on my top list of the worst movies I have ever seen. Yeah it's up there with Troll 2, Click, and Shark Attack: Megalodon. However... this movie had what the others didn't: Alan Fucking Cumming. And don't give me that "Yeah well John Barrowman was in Shark Attack"; yeah, well he couldn't save that shitty movie. Hey, all actors have at least one bad bad movie in their career, and this was definately Alan's. But Alan himself was so worth watching this movie for.
Loki, Loki, Loki... dammit Loki stop lookin' so fine in your leather pants & cape! You and your sleek car, dopey-but-cute hair, your love for beaches and causing mishap, and you... being Alan Fucking Cumming.
NO! Wrong Loki dammit!!!!
That's better!! <3
Now, there's one thing that seems to bother a lot of mythology peeps out there about this movie which really didn't bother me at all, and that is the Norse mythology of it. Now I love in general that they had Loki in this sequel. I remember talking to my sister after watching the first one (for the millionth time) before "Son of" came out and I thought then that Loki meeting Stanley Ipkiss would be an awesome story to see. Of course, Jim Carrey dropped out and this monstrosity was born. T_T I still like the idea of Stanley meeting Loki in confrontation and I have a fanfic idea already which I may someday get around to writing. I think it would be a good fic for those who love the original, hated the sequel, but loved Loki. You know, scrap "Son of" and write my own sequel as it were. But oh, how I digress!
So Norse mythology peeps always argue that Loki wasn't Odin's son but his bloodbrother or something like that. I unfortunately haven't studied much to any Norse mythology (to my dismay and anger towards Gilgamesh), so I wouldn't really think about it. Now what surprises me is that in "Thor," Loki is the spoilersadoptedspoilers son of Odin and I haven't heard any complaints about that. Now I never read the Thor comics so I don't know if that's the way it was in the comics or whatever. But seriously, Nose mythology peeps? It's a flipping movie. It sucks anyway, let it enjoy someting that actually didn't look horrid as a plot point. Yeah, I liked the whole "Odin wants Loki to be more like his awesome hunky son Thor, so he makes him find the darn mask" plot. Before "Thor" and "Son of", Loki was my favorite Norse god. Just the idea of a god being the ruler of something that is more of an idea than a physical thing: mischief. But, starting to digress away from the movie here, I'll give my final analysis.
Was this movie good? No. Is it the worst film ever made? No. Do I recommend it? Only to Alan Cumming fans and kids, because while the older fans come for Cumming, the kids can enjoy the childish humor that adults probably wouldn't like. Would I ever watch it again? Yes, because I enjoyed Alan so much that I would rewatch it if it meant watching him play Loki. I'd probably skip all the other scenes, but you get my point. If you hate this movie, I can see why; but if you like it, then good for you. I don't think this is great movie, but I've seen worse and I think that's saying something.