(no subject)
been a while huh? oh what? you didnt notice? thanks a bunch. you could have at least sent me some cookies. or a cake. or maybe some brownies or at least some chex mix. (returns 10 minutes later with about 2.5lbs of food)
sorry about that tirade, we were a bit famished.
so usually i just bother people with fairly long and incredibly nonsensical stories about either what i think about or do during my day. normally i tell people even if they dont want to hear about it. sometimes i tell myself when i dont want to hear about it. im a tough kid to live with. imagine dealing with that burden every day. i mean you sit down to accomplish something and all of a sudden you come in and complain that you got peanut butter stuck in your ear. oh the trials and tribulations of being jsto. its tough, but ive stuck it out with myelf and i apologize for those of you who have had to endure portions of the ridiculousness.
so i actually wrote this for a reason. it was to recount maybe one of the top 20 most ridiculous things that ive ever thought about. it probably wont make much sense to you, but just keep in mind that i was watching CNN in my living room while eating a hot pocket upside down (i was upside down, not the hot pocket-just a clarification). so i started thinking how cool it would be if we lived our whole life cycle backwards. i mean seriously. i know youve never thought about this before, but it would be tremendous. imagine it-you dont exist and then
(or snap, crackle pop or whoosh or any other onomatopoeia you could think of)
so there you are, about 94 years old, wrinkly, decayed and completely cenile....and you just popped out of an enormous plant. ive yet to determine how the plant creates people, but just go with it, its some sort of humongous, DNA creating magical plant and it just created you.
so your old...but your only getting younger. you go to school-when you cant do anything else. i mean think about how smart you could get if you didnt have any distractions. and then you would have the entire prime of your life to do as you please (go forth and multiply).
your living your whole life care-free. youve had a great life. youve done everything you wanted to. you might have killed a few people, but whose counting. but then you realize that your getting smaller. oh my god im shrinking! you yell....or something slightly more witty and less 1980's. so you deal with this for a few years and you realize that you cant accomplish anything so you just kind of sit there until eventually you become so useless that you start urinating on yourself. boom! the best part of the reverse life-cycle comes.
so when your completely useless and about 19 inches tall- you just randomly get eaten by your mother(who might be your kid). not like vacuumed or like magically transplanted...but just like viciously eaten, torn limb from limb.
i thought about this today, while sitting upside down on my couch eating a hot pocket around 3:45EST. you wonder why i have no friends? i think not
sorry about that tirade, we were a bit famished.
so usually i just bother people with fairly long and incredibly nonsensical stories about either what i think about or do during my day. normally i tell people even if they dont want to hear about it. sometimes i tell myself when i dont want to hear about it. im a tough kid to live with. imagine dealing with that burden every day. i mean you sit down to accomplish something and all of a sudden you come in and complain that you got peanut butter stuck in your ear. oh the trials and tribulations of being jsto. its tough, but ive stuck it out with myelf and i apologize for those of you who have had to endure portions of the ridiculousness.
so i actually wrote this for a reason. it was to recount maybe one of the top 20 most ridiculous things that ive ever thought about. it probably wont make much sense to you, but just keep in mind that i was watching CNN in my living room while eating a hot pocket upside down (i was upside down, not the hot pocket-just a clarification). so i started thinking how cool it would be if we lived our whole life cycle backwards. i mean seriously. i know youve never thought about this before, but it would be tremendous. imagine it-you dont exist and then
(or snap, crackle pop or whoosh or any other onomatopoeia you could think of)
so there you are, about 94 years old, wrinkly, decayed and completely cenile....and you just popped out of an enormous plant. ive yet to determine how the plant creates people, but just go with it, its some sort of humongous, DNA creating magical plant and it just created you.
so your old...but your only getting younger. you go to school-when you cant do anything else. i mean think about how smart you could get if you didnt have any distractions. and then you would have the entire prime of your life to do as you please (go forth and multiply).
your living your whole life care-free. youve had a great life. youve done everything you wanted to. you might have killed a few people, but whose counting. but then you realize that your getting smaller. oh my god im shrinking! you yell....or something slightly more witty and less 1980's. so you deal with this for a few years and you realize that you cant accomplish anything so you just kind of sit there until eventually you become so useless that you start urinating on yourself. boom! the best part of the reverse life-cycle comes.
so when your completely useless and about 19 inches tall- you just randomly get eaten by your mother(who might be your kid). not like vacuumed or like magically transplanted...but just like viciously eaten, torn limb from limb.
i thought about this today, while sitting upside down on my couch eating a hot pocket around 3:45EST. you wonder why i have no friends? i think not