What to Say?
How do you respond?
This weekend is going to be a doozy... another buddy getting married. I am happy for the guy. And all the stuff leading up to it is an experience in its own. I mean, how often do you see 4 guys getting a mani/pedi? not often... at least in my experience... then getting tuxes.... smooth...
got together with Frank to sign some stuff... and when i left he mentioned something that nearly made me cry... "if any time you decide to get your spiritual life in order, let me know... i could use you in the ministry and i still believe in you...." unfortunately, that means moving to Tennessee... it hurt, because i don't know if i believe in myself to do it and someone else does.... it is a calling, it is strenuous, and it requires a lot of pain... i don't think that i can do it.... and that's why i stopped believing and striving for the dream... it is a standard that i just can't keep... and i know it.
one mention of this, and it seems like everything goes to crap.... i thought that i could say these things, because i want it known what is going on in my heart and not let it turn around and hurt me... i don't understand it. and that hurts... and now it seems the mood is "finished"... and that hurts.... all in all, i think that this weekend should be fun... if i can play through the pain.....
This weekend is going to be a doozy... another buddy getting married. I am happy for the guy. And all the stuff leading up to it is an experience in its own. I mean, how often do you see 4 guys getting a mani/pedi? not often... at least in my experience... then getting tuxes.... smooth...
got together with Frank to sign some stuff... and when i left he mentioned something that nearly made me cry... "if any time you decide to get your spiritual life in order, let me know... i could use you in the ministry and i still believe in you...." unfortunately, that means moving to Tennessee... it hurt, because i don't know if i believe in myself to do it and someone else does.... it is a calling, it is strenuous, and it requires a lot of pain... i don't think that i can do it.... and that's why i stopped believing and striving for the dream... it is a standard that i just can't keep... and i know it.
one mention of this, and it seems like everything goes to crap.... i thought that i could say these things, because i want it known what is going on in my heart and not let it turn around and hurt me... i don't understand it. and that hurts... and now it seems the mood is "finished"... and that hurts.... all in all, i think that this weekend should be fun... if i can play through the pain.....