cheater cheater pumpkin eater

[plumerai]

What are some signs you’ve personally seen that flagged that a person is prone to cheating? Either someone you/a friend has been interested in, or someone you/a friend has dated?

(No, this isn’t personal; it’s for work but I thought there might be some interesting stories and insight from the internets...)

Comments

[risala]

The only time I've really been exposed to this is with best friend who's husband cheated on her.

Here were the indicators:

Several people at his place of employment kept mentioning (all hush-hush like) that he was sleeping with this girl that worked for him.

He didn't come home at night, twice in one month.

He kept "falling asleep on the couch" and never managing to come to bed.

He was generally an asshole, never wanted to help bestfriend with the baby, the housework, the bill-paying, etc.

He went on a skiing trip with his friends, including several girls, one of which was the one that his employees were always talking about, mentioned in the first indicator, AND PAID FOR THE GIRL TO GO.

Became just generally indignant about any question she asked him, such as "are you still going with me to my parents party this weekend?" or "what do you want for dinner tonight?"

There were lots more but they were very situational and might not be worth getting into. It was pretty obvious, really.

[editrix26]

I'd agree with a lot of that. She wanted to spend all of the money on clothes, getting her hair and makeup done every weekend before she went to a concert without him, indulgent stuff, and never helped with bills.

The catalyst for their breakup was he finally asked her not to go out one weeknight when she was sick, and she replied by saying she wanted a divorce.

Of course, it turned out she was fucking one of her new friends and had been unfaithful previously, but she told everyone in our group of friends that she was just unhappy and felt pressured into getting married, and had this ridiculous sob speech about her unhappiness.

[sixcylinders]

This sounds just like an acquaintance of mine who's currently engaged and, from the way the gossip mill has been spinning, is cheating on her fiance. I think the going out consistently and constantly without your SO is a pretty good indication.

[walkingbytch]

see this is a problem. Because when you have a SO and alot of memeber of your group do not, It also becomes a huge drag to always have him / her with you.

Not talking from personal experience or anything but it would not be incorrect to assume that my husband thinks he might actually have a vagina at some points, instead of simply being married to one.

[sixcylinders]

I'm not saying that you always need to have your SO with you, but if you're always staying out later than your significant other, and always going out without them, then there's a bit of a problem in that.

(Both my BF & I often socialize without the other [particularly now that we're in a LDR]--but not always, and even my single friends don't seem to have a problem with him being around on occasion. Frankly, I'd have a problem with them if they did.)

[risala]

It all happens the same way, it seems.

Of course, it turned out she was fucking one of her new friends and had been unfaithful previously, but she told everyone in our group of friends that she was just unhappy and felt pressured into getting married, and had this ridiculous sob speech about her unhappiness.
Check.

She wanted to spend all of the money on clothes, getting her hair and makeup done every weekend before she went to a concert without him, indulgent stuff, and never helped with bills.
Check. (well, it was beer, skiing, and video games)

[fuzzilla]

I've been there, too, with the Birthday Party Boy... He'd be like "but we *always* see your family..." I'd say "umm...how do Thanksgiving and Christmas suddenly qualify as *always*? Get over yourself." (He would go 'cuz I'd bitch up a storm, but what a bizarre thing to argue about in the first place).

[desenreda]

yes, the parent thing - "i am sure you'd rather just spend time with your family all on your own. i'd just get in the way" especially in cases where it doesnt make any sense (e.g. when walking for graduation)

and the obvious, i love you messages sent to pager (or whatever) when you are right there and clearly didnt send it.