Zombie Handling Skills Test
"In this practical exam, you will demonstrate your ability to manuver a zombie through a small obstacle course. Afterwords you will have time to scratch in the dirt, detailing your zombie handling techniques. After you are done with the scratching, you will be invited to crow and burble for our four interviewers."
The chicken blinks confusedly for a minute, was told initially that it was simply going to be given an opportunity to practice crowing prior to crowing before the panel. She shrugs her wings, leaps up on the pen and eyeballs the selected zombie. It shuffles about and stares blankly at nothing in particular.
Flapping her wings, the chicken sails across the short distance and lands gracefully on the zombies head, talons firmly gripping the dried, wrinkled fleshs and patches of thin hair. Leaning forward, she urges the zombie to stumble forward towards a maze of posts. Leaning right, she uses her weight to pull the zombies head right and the rest of the body follows. After guiding the zombie carefully thtough the maze, she briefly rubs her beak on its scalp as thanks then hops off onto the fence.
After firmly scratching in the dirt for a few minutes, she impresses the four interviewers; an elderly male sheep, his wool tipped with gray, a young female goat, an firm bull with sharp horns, and a goofy goose wearing a polyester bowling shirt. She recieved 5/5 on all but one crowing and burbling reply, giving appropriate beady eye, neck stretch, and demonstrating she would use a spur if it was necessary as all zombie handlers were required to wear spurs just like the guard dogs that patrolled the farms edges. The firm bull snorted approval at the last burble and he and the elderly sheep took great pains to insure that the chicken was well aware of the time line for proper funding for zombie handlers. The bull also made sure that the chicken knew that he considered her a proper candidate. Probably the ring left around the chickens head left by the army helmet impressed him.
The chicken blinks confusedly for a minute, was told initially that it was simply going to be given an opportunity to practice crowing prior to crowing before the panel. She shrugs her wings, leaps up on the pen and eyeballs the selected zombie. It shuffles about and stares blankly at nothing in particular.
Flapping her wings, the chicken sails across the short distance and lands gracefully on the zombies head, talons firmly gripping the dried, wrinkled fleshs and patches of thin hair. Leaning forward, she urges the zombie to stumble forward towards a maze of posts. Leaning right, she uses her weight to pull the zombies head right and the rest of the body follows. After guiding the zombie carefully thtough the maze, she briefly rubs her beak on its scalp as thanks then hops off onto the fence.
After firmly scratching in the dirt for a few minutes, she impresses the four interviewers; an elderly male sheep, his wool tipped with gray, a young female goat, an firm bull with sharp horns, and a goofy goose wearing a polyester bowling shirt. She recieved 5/5 on all but one crowing and burbling reply, giving appropriate beady eye, neck stretch, and demonstrating she would use a spur if it was necessary as all zombie handlers were required to wear spurs just like the guard dogs that patrolled the farms edges. The firm bull snorted approval at the last burble and he and the elderly sheep took great pains to insure that the chicken was well aware of the time line for proper funding for zombie handlers. The bull also made sure that the chicken knew that he considered her a proper candidate. Probably the ring left around the chickens head left by the army helmet impressed him.