(no subject)
Mathias wakes from the island, almost as if it's been nothing but a dream.
For a long time, nothing makes sense. The light in his bedroom is different than the light that should have been filtering into the hut and the air doesn't smell right. He can smell the pollution in the air and then, distantly, the sound of the city below comes to him. Car horns and people talking, shouts, laughter, the hum of existence that had never been quite so loud on the island as it was in Munich.
Because he's home. Somehow. The island has been left behind and rather than being returned to that hilltop to meet the knife in Eric's hand, he's here in his flat in Munich. He lies in his bed, his gaze drifting toward the plants in his bay window and it's only a moment before his tiny cat jumps up onto the bed and meows softly. No time at all has passed. He's never even gone to Mexico.
Somewhere, Henrich is still alive.
Somewhere in California, Mathias thinks, is Veronica.
The cat meows again softly and Mathias slowly sits up in his bed. His hands are shaking and he's aware that so much has been given back to him with this. His life, his brother, everything he's ever known, but so much else has been taken away. It takes a long time for him to finally get out of bed, longer still to make the phone call to Henrich and his brother's voice rings clear over the telephone line. They talk about their upcoming trip and in mere minutes, Mathias has Henrich convinced that they should forget about Mexico this year and travel to California instead. The surfing is better, he insists, and it doesn't take long for Henrich to agree.
They hang up, plans made and he looks around his empty apartment. On the desk in the office are his engineering texts, his laptop, his cell phone and iPod. There are travel brochures for Mexico and he wishes that he knew enough about the others to call them. An anonymous call to Stacy might change their lives, but he doesn't have their contact information and he doesn't even remember where they're from.
Mathias doesn't cry. But for a long time he sits at the small table in his kitchen, sunlight spilling over his face, and he rests his head in his hands.
-
Within a week, they're flying to California and Mathias has no idea what he's going to do when they arrive. Henrich thinks they'll be staying in San Diego, but Mathias knows where he's going. Something has changed and though he's sure that there was no town called Neptune before he spent time on the island, there is now. He's looked it up on maps, on wikipedia, done as much research as possible and it doesn't matter how it exists, just that is does.
He knows why. He's supposed to go there. That's why it's here now when it never was before.
They fight in the airport when they arrive. It's so familiar that Mathias almost hugs Henrich in the midst of their argument, right after calling him a stubborn asshole, and it isn't until Henrich asks why he wants to go to Neptune that the fight comes to a swift end.
"For a girl," Mathias says and Henrich has no answer to that.
He grins, a sight Mathias has missed more than he knows how to say, then claps Mathias on the shoulder. "You should have said so." Then he turns toward the baggage claim and that's the end of the conversation. They're going to Neptune.
When Mathias looks at his watch, he's suddenly very aware that Henrich would be on that hill already. Maybe even dead. If he can change that, he thinks, then this isn't so crazy. If he can save his brother's life, then maybe he'll find her here.
-
It isn't very hard to find Mars Investigations and as Henrich spots a pretty girl down the street, Mathias looks up at the building apprehensively. Veronica may be in there, but it's more likely Keith Mars he's going to meet inside and he isn't sure how to even begin to explain this. I knew you and your daughter both on a magical island. I loved her. It doesn't sound sane and Mathias doesn't know how much they remember, if anything.
He stands there for a long time, glancing up and down the street as he tries to make a decision.
"You know, my daughter isn't going to appreciate it much if I have to tell her that you've been skulking."
Mathias glances up at the voice and finds himself at a loss for words. Keith Mars is standing in front of him with a faintly amused smile.
"Veronica's never liked skulkers much," Keith continues, holding the door open for Mathias to follow him inside.
"No," Mathias manages to get out finally, entering the building. The cool, dim interior is calming and he follows Keith up the stairs and into an office with a desk and a couch. It's empty for now, but Mathias knows it won't be for long.
"She's still in high school, you know," Keith continues conversationally. "We've never quite figured out how the timing works. Sometimes I think this isn't even the same world we left the first time. If it were, you'd still be in high school, too, wouldn't you?"
"Yes," Mathias says, and he sits on the couch, his legs weak. "But I'm not. Judging by the books in my apartment, I was in my second year of school after the army, so I must be at least twenty-three."
"A little old for my eighteen-year-old daughter," Keith says, but he's still smiling as he sits down as well. "I've had to make adjustments to my way of thinking since we came back. I had to talk her out of going to Munich at least twice. It's been a few months and she's... well, I wouldn't use the term pining, mostly because she'd kill me, but she's been waiting."
"For what?" Mathias asks.
The look Keith gives him makes it clear, but still he says, "For you, you idiot. I don't mean that in the traditional way. She's still Veronica, but she's not always entirely here. I guess none of us are."
"How..." But there's no question to be asked that Keith can answer, Mathias knows this. He's also beginning to suspect that the other man is right. This isn't the world they'd left the first time. It's something else. Another version of the island, perhaps, a place where timelines cross and shift until they meet. Mathias had returned home to a place in time before he'd left the island and it sounds as if Veronica has as well.
If this is a second -- third? -- chance, it's an extremely strange one.
"She'll be at school for another hour," Keith says, glancing at the time before he returns to his desk and begins to shuffle through paperwork. "Maybe you should be there when she gets out of class."
It takes Mathias a moment, but eventually he stands. His legs are still shaking, but he smiles at Keith, an expression full of hope and terror.
"She'll be happy to see you," Keith says. "Just don't tell her I said anything about her pining."
Mathias laughs and he nods. "Thank you," he says. "I... thank you."
"Just do me a favour and pretend you two are the same age when you're around me," Keith says and Mathias laughs again as he disappears down the stairs and exits into the midday sun.
-
When he finds himself in front of her school an hour later, he isn't nervous, exactly. There's a sense of fear underlying everything he does, every moment, a deep sort of terror that he can't quite place. He's far from scared of Veronica, but he's scared of what this all means. What this world is, who he is inside of it, who they are (or aren't) and although it doesn't show on his face, he's definitely scared. But not nervous.
Not even as he sees her coming out the front doors, walking with a young man he's never seen before. That doesn't mean anything, he knows, there are any number of Veronica's friends who weren't on the island at all or weren't there at the same time he was, but he's still suddenly struck with uncertainty. What if she's moved on? What if she doesn't remember him at all.
But then she's looking at him. The guy beside her continues to speak, but when he realizes she isn't listening, he frowns and follows her gaze, but Mathias only sees Veronica.
They don't run toward one another. Mathias is the first to move, pushing away from the fence he's been leaning on, then Veronica begins to walk again, her friend trailing alongside her. Other students cross between them as they walk toward each other, but Mathias doesn't notice them.
"So," Veronica says when they're finally close enough to hear each other. "You found me."
"I did," Mathias agrees. He wants to touch her, to hold her, his hands even begin to rise, but he forces himself to drop them again. This is new territory all over again and he isn't sure what to do.
"Mathias, this is Wallace," she says, nodding toward her friend.
Wallace, at least, seems to understand right away and he nods. "Yeah, so... I'm outta here," he says, flashing Veronica a grin before he disappears into the crowd of students leaving class.
"He made a quick exit," Mathias comments.
Veronica nods. "Didn't even say it was nice to meet you."
"No," Mathias answers and it takes them another minute still before they cross the distance and he reaches for her hand, which she gives to him willingly. It isn't much, not in this crowded parking lot, but it's everything after so many months apart and Mathias finds himself at a loss for words.
There's so much to be said, so many things he wants to ask her about, things he wants to tell her. But Veronica has always known how to make it difficult for him to speak, so before he can even open his mouth to ask his questions, she's pushed up on her toes and brushed her mouth over his.
"It doesn't matter how it works, does it?" she asks.
"You always like to know how things work," Mathias murmurs in return, his lips brushing hers as he speaks and he can feel Veronica smiling.
"Yeah, well, call this my blind spot," she says, then presses another kiss to his mouth.
When they part, still holding hands, Mathias nods. "It doesn't matter how it works," he agrees. They're here, wherever here is, and maybe they'll only have a limited time again, but he's happy to have it. He's happy to take advantage of this opportunity to be with her again.
"My dad said he figured you'd show up eventually," she says.
"Your dad said you were pining for me," he returns with a grin and Veronica laughs, a sound that Mathias finds he missed as much as he missed seeing her face. Every moment of this is perfect, as far as he's concerned, from her hand in his, to the memory of her lips on his, even the students walking around them, some of them casting glances in their direction.
"Yeah, well, daddy dearest is gonna get an earful when we get back there," Veronica says.
"He'll have to get used to his daughter dating an older man," Mathias tells her with a smile.
She cocks her head slightly, looking up at him. "Are we dating again, then?"
"I don't know that we ever stopped," Mathias answers and for a moment they just stand there.
For a moment, if he pretends, they've never been apart.
For a long time, nothing makes sense. The light in his bedroom is different than the light that should have been filtering into the hut and the air doesn't smell right. He can smell the pollution in the air and then, distantly, the sound of the city below comes to him. Car horns and people talking, shouts, laughter, the hum of existence that had never been quite so loud on the island as it was in Munich.
Because he's home. Somehow. The island has been left behind and rather than being returned to that hilltop to meet the knife in Eric's hand, he's here in his flat in Munich. He lies in his bed, his gaze drifting toward the plants in his bay window and it's only a moment before his tiny cat jumps up onto the bed and meows softly. No time at all has passed. He's never even gone to Mexico.
Somewhere, Henrich is still alive.
Somewhere in California, Mathias thinks, is Veronica.
The cat meows again softly and Mathias slowly sits up in his bed. His hands are shaking and he's aware that so much has been given back to him with this. His life, his brother, everything he's ever known, but so much else has been taken away. It takes a long time for him to finally get out of bed, longer still to make the phone call to Henrich and his brother's voice rings clear over the telephone line. They talk about their upcoming trip and in mere minutes, Mathias has Henrich convinced that they should forget about Mexico this year and travel to California instead. The surfing is better, he insists, and it doesn't take long for Henrich to agree.
They hang up, plans made and he looks around his empty apartment. On the desk in the office are his engineering texts, his laptop, his cell phone and iPod. There are travel brochures for Mexico and he wishes that he knew enough about the others to call them. An anonymous call to Stacy might change their lives, but he doesn't have their contact information and he doesn't even remember where they're from.
Mathias doesn't cry. But for a long time he sits at the small table in his kitchen, sunlight spilling over his face, and he rests his head in his hands.
-
Within a week, they're flying to California and Mathias has no idea what he's going to do when they arrive. Henrich thinks they'll be staying in San Diego, but Mathias knows where he's going. Something has changed and though he's sure that there was no town called Neptune before he spent time on the island, there is now. He's looked it up on maps, on wikipedia, done as much research as possible and it doesn't matter how it exists, just that is does.
He knows why. He's supposed to go there. That's why it's here now when it never was before.
They fight in the airport when they arrive. It's so familiar that Mathias almost hugs Henrich in the midst of their argument, right after calling him a stubborn asshole, and it isn't until Henrich asks why he wants to go to Neptune that the fight comes to a swift end.
"For a girl," Mathias says and Henrich has no answer to that.
He grins, a sight Mathias has missed more than he knows how to say, then claps Mathias on the shoulder. "You should have said so." Then he turns toward the baggage claim and that's the end of the conversation. They're going to Neptune.
When Mathias looks at his watch, he's suddenly very aware that Henrich would be on that hill already. Maybe even dead. If he can change that, he thinks, then this isn't so crazy. If he can save his brother's life, then maybe he'll find her here.
-
It isn't very hard to find Mars Investigations and as Henrich spots a pretty girl down the street, Mathias looks up at the building apprehensively. Veronica may be in there, but it's more likely Keith Mars he's going to meet inside and he isn't sure how to even begin to explain this. I knew you and your daughter both on a magical island. I loved her. It doesn't sound sane and Mathias doesn't know how much they remember, if anything.
He stands there for a long time, glancing up and down the street as he tries to make a decision.
"You know, my daughter isn't going to appreciate it much if I have to tell her that you've been skulking."
Mathias glances up at the voice and finds himself at a loss for words. Keith Mars is standing in front of him with a faintly amused smile.
"Veronica's never liked skulkers much," Keith continues, holding the door open for Mathias to follow him inside.
"No," Mathias manages to get out finally, entering the building. The cool, dim interior is calming and he follows Keith up the stairs and into an office with a desk and a couch. It's empty for now, but Mathias knows it won't be for long.
"She's still in high school, you know," Keith continues conversationally. "We've never quite figured out how the timing works. Sometimes I think this isn't even the same world we left the first time. If it were, you'd still be in high school, too, wouldn't you?"
"Yes," Mathias says, and he sits on the couch, his legs weak. "But I'm not. Judging by the books in my apartment, I was in my second year of school after the army, so I must be at least twenty-three."
"A little old for my eighteen-year-old daughter," Keith says, but he's still smiling as he sits down as well. "I've had to make adjustments to my way of thinking since we came back. I had to talk her out of going to Munich at least twice. It's been a few months and she's... well, I wouldn't use the term pining, mostly because she'd kill me, but she's been waiting."
"For what?" Mathias asks.
The look Keith gives him makes it clear, but still he says, "For you, you idiot. I don't mean that in the traditional way. She's still Veronica, but she's not always entirely here. I guess none of us are."
"How..." But there's no question to be asked that Keith can answer, Mathias knows this. He's also beginning to suspect that the other man is right. This isn't the world they'd left the first time. It's something else. Another version of the island, perhaps, a place where timelines cross and shift until they meet. Mathias had returned home to a place in time before he'd left the island and it sounds as if Veronica has as well.
If this is a second -- third? -- chance, it's an extremely strange one.
"She'll be at school for another hour," Keith says, glancing at the time before he returns to his desk and begins to shuffle through paperwork. "Maybe you should be there when she gets out of class."
It takes Mathias a moment, but eventually he stands. His legs are still shaking, but he smiles at Keith, an expression full of hope and terror.
"She'll be happy to see you," Keith says. "Just don't tell her I said anything about her pining."
Mathias laughs and he nods. "Thank you," he says. "I... thank you."
"Just do me a favour and pretend you two are the same age when you're around me," Keith says and Mathias laughs again as he disappears down the stairs and exits into the midday sun.
-
When he finds himself in front of her school an hour later, he isn't nervous, exactly. There's a sense of fear underlying everything he does, every moment, a deep sort of terror that he can't quite place. He's far from scared of Veronica, but he's scared of what this all means. What this world is, who he is inside of it, who they are (or aren't) and although it doesn't show on his face, he's definitely scared. But not nervous.
Not even as he sees her coming out the front doors, walking with a young man he's never seen before. That doesn't mean anything, he knows, there are any number of Veronica's friends who weren't on the island at all or weren't there at the same time he was, but he's still suddenly struck with uncertainty. What if she's moved on? What if she doesn't remember him at all.
But then she's looking at him. The guy beside her continues to speak, but when he realizes she isn't listening, he frowns and follows her gaze, but Mathias only sees Veronica.
They don't run toward one another. Mathias is the first to move, pushing away from the fence he's been leaning on, then Veronica begins to walk again, her friend trailing alongside her. Other students cross between them as they walk toward each other, but Mathias doesn't notice them.
"So," Veronica says when they're finally close enough to hear each other. "You found me."
"I did," Mathias agrees. He wants to touch her, to hold her, his hands even begin to rise, but he forces himself to drop them again. This is new territory all over again and he isn't sure what to do.
"Mathias, this is Wallace," she says, nodding toward her friend.
Wallace, at least, seems to understand right away and he nods. "Yeah, so... I'm outta here," he says, flashing Veronica a grin before he disappears into the crowd of students leaving class.
"He made a quick exit," Mathias comments.
Veronica nods. "Didn't even say it was nice to meet you."
"No," Mathias answers and it takes them another minute still before they cross the distance and he reaches for her hand, which she gives to him willingly. It isn't much, not in this crowded parking lot, but it's everything after so many months apart and Mathias finds himself at a loss for words.
There's so much to be said, so many things he wants to ask her about, things he wants to tell her. But Veronica has always known how to make it difficult for him to speak, so before he can even open his mouth to ask his questions, she's pushed up on her toes and brushed her mouth over his.
"It doesn't matter how it works, does it?" she asks.
"You always like to know how things work," Mathias murmurs in return, his lips brushing hers as he speaks and he can feel Veronica smiling.
"Yeah, well, call this my blind spot," she says, then presses another kiss to his mouth.
When they part, still holding hands, Mathias nods. "It doesn't matter how it works," he agrees. They're here, wherever here is, and maybe they'll only have a limited time again, but he's happy to have it. He's happy to take advantage of this opportunity to be with her again.
"My dad said he figured you'd show up eventually," she says.
"Your dad said you were pining for me," he returns with a grin and Veronica laughs, a sound that Mathias finds he missed as much as he missed seeing her face. Every moment of this is perfect, as far as he's concerned, from her hand in his, to the memory of her lips on his, even the students walking around them, some of them casting glances in their direction.
"Yeah, well, daddy dearest is gonna get an earful when we get back there," Veronica says.
"He'll have to get used to his daughter dating an older man," Mathias tells her with a smile.
She cocks her head slightly, looking up at him. "Are we dating again, then?"
"I don't know that we ever stopped," Mathias answers and for a moment they just stand there.
For a moment, if he pretends, they've never been apart.