(no subject)
ok, so matt has wonderfully told me that i'm somewhat paranoid. and not gonna lie, he is kinda right.
anyways, so coming back from break i've lost something, or rather someone(s). i know i kept telling myself that what i was doing what not a big deal, and that it was something i wanted. and yes while that was true, i was not expecting to lose it....at least that soon. thing is i don't know why it happened that way. and you know me, i'm not one to initiate anything-- so it's not like i'm gonna go up and ask what happened or what went wrong. i know w/ one guy it was b/c i called him desperate. but i mean, not gonna lie, he was. and he called us "friends with benefits", when really that was the first time we ever met face to face. we were more like acquantences. and the other guy, well, i feel like after that night before break wasn't what he or i expected. and since it wasn't "up to par", i guess we're done. cuz the most we've talked/seen each other is at chapter. [haha, and b4 you go calling me a smut, there's one more] and he's the only one that has kept in contact. i'm not sure if i should try and fix things....if there is anything to fix.
but then i think, there are way more impt things to think about-- like school, and st. patty's day......
anyways, so coming back from break i've lost something, or rather someone(s). i know i kept telling myself that what i was doing what not a big deal, and that it was something i wanted. and yes while that was true, i was not expecting to lose it....at least that soon. thing is i don't know why it happened that way. and you know me, i'm not one to initiate anything-- so it's not like i'm gonna go up and ask what happened or what went wrong. i know w/ one guy it was b/c i called him desperate. but i mean, not gonna lie, he was. and he called us "friends with benefits", when really that was the first time we ever met face to face. we were more like acquantences. and the other guy, well, i feel like after that night before break wasn't what he or i expected. and since it wasn't "up to par", i guess we're done. cuz the most we've talked/seen each other is at chapter. [haha, and b4 you go calling me a smut, there's one more] and he's the only one that has kept in contact. i'm not sure if i should try and fix things....if there is anything to fix.
but then i think, there are way more impt things to think about-- like school, and st. patty's day......