Venting and Pondering...
WHY DO THEY ALWAYS HAVE TO TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME!!!??? AARRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
Stupid military! They've taken him away for 16 days this time. Then he gets to come home for 2 weeks, then they take him again for a month, then they give him back to me for 2 months, then they turn around and steal him again for 12-16 months!!! I F-ING HATE IT!!! It's so lonely... in my heart and in my bed. :) The dumbest thing about this one is that he is at Ft. Bragg. HE IS 10 MILES AWAY AND THEY WON'T LET HIM COME HOME AND I CAN'T SEE HIM. How dumb is that. I get to talk to him for about 10 mins a day, and that's it. GGGRRRRRRRRRR.
Ok, so I'm done venting. Here is my ponderance... kids. If it was up to me and we had a clean slate, I wouldn't want to have any. I would opt for the no kids, focus on each other and our careers lifestyle. But here is the thing. All Peter has ever wanted is to have his own family... including lots of sons with manly names like Hunter and Harley. Also, we don't get the luxury of a clean slate. Peter already has a daughter, and, God willing, we will be raising her full time within the next month or so. So, my point is, I will be raising kids. Period. So if I'm already raising a child, through no choice of my own (Not that she is a burden; she is anything but that- she is a blessing. She is a beautiful and wonderful little girl, and I am so excited to welcome her into our home. My point is that I did not choose to have a child; I chose to love a man who already has one.) why not give Peter the family he so badly wants?
Before, I was thinking we should wait 10 years or so before we started thinking about starting our own family, but if I'm already rasing a child, why not raise more than one. I'll be raising kids for the next 20 years anyhow, so the longer we wait, the longer we'll be raising kids. Do we want to be raising kids for 20 years or for 35-40 years. If I'm doing it anyways, why not go all the way?
Hmmm...
Stupid military! They've taken him away for 16 days this time. Then he gets to come home for 2 weeks, then they take him again for a month, then they give him back to me for 2 months, then they turn around and steal him again for 12-16 months!!! I F-ING HATE IT!!! It's so lonely... in my heart and in my bed. :) The dumbest thing about this one is that he is at Ft. Bragg. HE IS 10 MILES AWAY AND THEY WON'T LET HIM COME HOME AND I CAN'T SEE HIM. How dumb is that. I get to talk to him for about 10 mins a day, and that's it. GGGRRRRRRRRRR.
Ok, so I'm done venting. Here is my ponderance... kids. If it was up to me and we had a clean slate, I wouldn't want to have any. I would opt for the no kids, focus on each other and our careers lifestyle. But here is the thing. All Peter has ever wanted is to have his own family... including lots of sons with manly names like Hunter and Harley. Also, we don't get the luxury of a clean slate. Peter already has a daughter, and, God willing, we will be raising her full time within the next month or so. So, my point is, I will be raising kids. Period. So if I'm already raising a child, through no choice of my own (Not that she is a burden; she is anything but that- she is a blessing. She is a beautiful and wonderful little girl, and I am so excited to welcome her into our home. My point is that I did not choose to have a child; I chose to love a man who already has one.) why not give Peter the family he so badly wants?
Before, I was thinking we should wait 10 years or so before we started thinking about starting our own family, but if I'm already rasing a child, why not raise more than one. I'll be raising kids for the next 20 years anyhow, so the longer we wait, the longer we'll be raising kids. Do we want to be raising kids for 20 years or for 35-40 years. If I'm doing it anyways, why not go all the way?
Hmmm...