White Trash/Sexual Predator Night at Borders...
Ok, so after Starbucks, Lauren 
and I decide we want to go to Borders. Five minutes prior to walking in my mom called me on my cell and asked me to get her Naked In Baghdad (?) or some such book if I could find it. So anyway, I'm casually browsing the History & Politics section while Lauren runs upstairs to look at music, right? Right. So then completely out of the blue..this cute gorgeous guy walks by me and starts looking at books on the shelf right next to me. Now I'm not one of those girls that fawns over every other guy she sees, but this guy totally had the tall, dark, and handsome thing going for him. PLUS he was dressed to the nines and looked like one of those deep, mystifying, intelligent guys that I'm never lucky enough to run into. Well, to avoid looking like an airheaded idiot lost in the History & Politics section..I grabbed the closest book to my hand, picked it up, and started sifting through it. The Bad Girl's Guide To Getting Personal. In the History & Politics section..wtf? Anyway, no less than 15 seconds after I picked it up did the aforementioned beautiful guy standing next to me reach over and lightly tap the cover of the book, turn his head down to smile at me with the whitest teeth I've ever seen in all my seventeen years on this planet, and say "Interesting reading, huh?" All I could think to do was laugh. Go figure.
Then he walks away and I see him picking up books in the Psychology section. (Yes, I'm fully aware that I sound like a stalker right now, but keep reading.) As he was looking at different books, every now and then he would turn his head and either smile or just gaze at me. There was a knot in my stomach. No joke. This boy was bordering perfect. And he was looking at psychology books??$!#* Who owns AP Psych? Yep, this chica right here. I was thinking soul mate at this point. (Ok, maybe I'm overexaggerating just a little bit).
OK OK OK. Then I cleared my mind (sort of) and started looking for the book my mom wanted me to get (which was a struggle considering she didn't know the author's name). So I'm all alone in this section in the back of the bookstore, right? Well these two guys walk towards me..I'm guessing they were both in early/mid-thirties..one was this big, tall black guy and the other was this short I-look-like-I-just-walked-off-the-set-of-the-Jerry-Springer-show white trash guy. Yeah, they looked like an odd couple, to say the least. Anyway, I noticed they were each holding a stack of books, which I thought was sort of weird considering it looked like all the books they were carrying were the same, and it was obvious they didn't work there. Well they both nodded their heads at me and since I got a bad vibe from them and didn't feel like looking for my mom's book anymore, I walked over into another section and started looking around. Five seconds later the two guys walk up to me and the black guy puts his hand on my shoulder and goes "You are very cute" in this deep, creepy voice. Don't get me wrong, it would've been flattering if you forget the part about them being old (they weren't just numerically old, they looked OLD. fuck me, these guys were scary looking). Not only that, but I kept the sex appeal down to a minimum tonight. Denim jeans and a pink top with my black North Face jacket over it, my hair up, and little-to-no makeup on. Not exactly eye-popping and jaw-dropping, to say the least. So I raised an eyebrow, said thanks, walked away, then headed up the stairs to find Lauren.
Lauren ended up buying a few things and we saw them walk out empty-handed. After carrying around so many books? Sketch. I swear to God they were sexual predators in search of a pretty young girl to kidnap and rape. Maybe not, but that's the most realistic explanation I can think of.
So I guess I should get back to the original storyline...
After the whole entire encounter my mysterious lovah went MIA and was never to be seen or heard from again. But that's ok. Lauren and I went back to the Psychology section (What can I say? I was curious) to see what kind of books he was looking at..and..surprise, surprise. "50 Pin-Up Girls," "Sex Techniques for Beginners," etc. etc. etc. Motherfuckingsexbooks. In the psychology section, yes.
So, in conclusion, my night at the bookstore turned into being (easily) misled by a sexy boy and harassed/hit on by a would-be serial rapist. Awesome.
and I decide we want to go to Borders. Five minutes prior to walking in my mom called me on my cell and asked me to get her Naked In Baghdad (?) or some such book if I could find it. So anyway, I'm casually browsing the History & Politics section while Lauren runs upstairs to look at music, right? Right. So then completely out of the blue..this cute gorgeous guy walks by me and starts looking at books on the shelf right next to me. Now I'm not one of those girls that fawns over every other guy she sees, but this guy totally had the tall, dark, and handsome thing going for him. PLUS he was dressed to the nines and looked like one of those deep, mystifying, intelligent guys that I'm never lucky enough to run into. Well, to avoid looking like an airheaded idiot lost in the History & Politics section..I grabbed the closest book to my hand, picked it up, and started sifting through it. The Bad Girl's Guide To Getting Personal. In the History & Politics section..wtf? Anyway, no less than 15 seconds after I picked it up did the aforementioned beautiful guy standing next to me reach over and lightly tap the cover of the book, turn his head down to smile at me with the whitest teeth I've ever seen in all my seventeen years on this planet, and say "Interesting reading, huh?" All I could think to do was laugh. Go figure.
Then he walks away and I see him picking up books in the Psychology section. (Yes, I'm fully aware that I sound like a stalker right now, but keep reading.) As he was looking at different books, every now and then he would turn his head and either smile or just gaze at me. There was a knot in my stomach. No joke. This boy was bordering perfect. And he was looking at psychology books??$!#* Who owns AP Psych? Yep, this chica right here. I was thinking soul mate at this point. (Ok, maybe I'm overexaggerating just a little bit).
OK OK OK. Then I cleared my mind (sort of) and started looking for the book my mom wanted me to get (which was a struggle considering she didn't know the author's name). So I'm all alone in this section in the back of the bookstore, right? Well these two guys walk towards me..I'm guessing they were both in early/mid-thirties..one was this big, tall black guy and the other was this short I-look-like-I-just-walked-off-the-set-of-the-Jerry-Springer-show white trash guy. Yeah, they looked like an odd couple, to say the least. Anyway, I noticed they were each holding a stack of books, which I thought was sort of weird considering it looked like all the books they were carrying were the same, and it was obvious they didn't work there. Well they both nodded their heads at me and since I got a bad vibe from them and didn't feel like looking for my mom's book anymore, I walked over into another section and started looking around. Five seconds later the two guys walk up to me and the black guy puts his hand on my shoulder and goes "You are very cute" in this deep, creepy voice. Don't get me wrong, it would've been flattering if you forget the part about them being old (they weren't just numerically old, they looked OLD. fuck me, these guys were scary looking). Not only that, but I kept the sex appeal down to a minimum tonight. Denim jeans and a pink top with my black North Face jacket over it, my hair up, and little-to-no makeup on. Not exactly eye-popping and jaw-dropping, to say the least. So I raised an eyebrow, said thanks, walked away, then headed up the stairs to find Lauren.
Lauren ended up buying a few things and we saw them walk out empty-handed. After carrying around so many books? Sketch. I swear to God they were sexual predators in search of a pretty young girl to kidnap and rape. Maybe not, but that's the most realistic explanation I can think of.
So I guess I should get back to the original storyline...
After the whole entire encounter my mysterious lovah went MIA and was never to be seen or heard from again. But that's ok. Lauren and I went back to the Psychology section (What can I say? I was curious) to see what kind of books he was looking at..and..surprise, surprise. "50 Pin-Up Girls," "Sex Techniques for Beginners," etc. etc. etc. Motherfuckingsexbooks. In the psychology section, yes.
So, in conclusion, my night at the bookstore turned into being (easily) misled by a sexy boy and harassed/hit on by a would-be serial rapist. Awesome.