Lesson learned

[plasticpoet7]

I was trying to put back the
pieces by explaining to you one night,
but then I realized,
it was something you couldn't
understand.

Because you weren't
the one who I was actually referring to.
It was the fabricated vision of you
whom I was addressing.

You saw I was crazy.

I'm totally in the backround
of your every day. Don't stop for me.
The real you has a life to contend to,
I'm totally and utterly without one.

So I've held hands with the "you"
whos emerged from my own reflection.
I'm still writing my
brainstorms on how to live.
At least self pity has subsided.

We fought in my dream last night,
Our arguments grew severe, and
you kicked me. I yelled, and left
and cried outside.
After fifteen minuets had passed,
you came out, towards me,
you sat down,
the fabricated you,
apologized and gave me a hug.
I smiled, hugged you back,
and then I felt you
evaporating.

Now I finally can see the distinction.
I know my mistake, but more importantly
my lessons. I don't have to look at
the real you to find myself anymore.

I'm leaving, it's time to go.
I'm not sure shit happened,
but I know within all the nothingness,
it's sure been a hell of a long time.

I've distinguished the difference
between two women from two girls.
There's nothing left for me to sort out
it seems. My words have finally
become my own.