This is just one of those things.

[plasticlives]

I've been in a weird mood lately, and for the most part the only time im truly having a good time is when im high or drunk. The truth is though that I'm lonely. I'm surrounded by good people. I love all 3 of my roomates but I just can't explain enough how much I miss you. I'll buy your food. I'll buy your gas. I'll buy your alcohol. I'll smoke you down. I feel so much distance between us and its not even miles. I am so happy that things got better with time. That me going off to school didn't ruin anything for u. But it's so hard at the same time. I think I just might be selfish but I can't help it. I need you more than u understand cause u can't see how upset and depressed i get and look everyday. I think the hardest part is knowing u don't need me anymore. You have people surrounding u who make u happy and do things with u and thats fine. I just miss being needed. I don't know why exactly. I think it's because it gave me some sort of purpose. I liked that feeling of knowing not just that I had a best friend but that I was someones best friend. I am so lonely here. so lonely. so lonely. I love you though, and no matter how seperated we are, or how many new best friends u get, or how long it goes in between the times we see each other I'm not leaving. I'm not letting u get away from me and I'm not giving up

im going to get drunk.