The End of Semester 4: Burnout, Love and Goodbyes
Its been forever since I updated this, and longer than forever since I updated it with a real entry. As I have just started a new chapter in my life I think its time for a recap of what's happened since I last updated, before I begin a whole new wave of entries in the coming days, weeks and months. I must warn you, this will be pretty damn long!
THE WRATH OF CAD
The second half of the Spring 2005 semester was the most hectic few weeks of my life. One module in particular - CAD 1 - was the principal cause of this. The module is based around a fundamentally flawed program and the project given was considerably more difficult than any project set in that module to date, namely the modelling and animation of a mobile phone. This caused me, and many others in the class, to put in some very long days in the second-last week of the project, and a series of 5 days in the final week in which an average of at least 18 hours of work per day was achieved. This led to me getting 9 hours sleep in the last 5 days of the semester and both Mark and Dave seeing the sun rise through the window of the computer lab. This was very damaging to my health - and is more than likely the principal cause of my getting sick in the last few days of the semester and ruining the end of semester celebrations for me, as well as the last few days I had with Shannan.
BREAKING THE RULES
Shannan - the perfect foil for anything that the insane semester could throw at me and my reason for getting through it. I never hid that I had a huge crush on her from the time she moved in. The worst kept secret in Plassey history was the blatant flirting between us right from the outset. However the best kept secret in Plassey history was that on 3/31 to the Americans, or 31/3 to the Irish, we kissed... and then decided to continue to do so on a regular basis. This very definitely broke the "don't date a housemate" rule that is part of the unwritten but understood college code. Somehow we managed to keep it quiet for a whole three weeks until, on the day we decided to tell everyone anyway, Katie misinterpreted some noises she heard from my room and heralded the revelations with the immortal away message:
PsycoMezzma: I... just... *sigh*
I'm not... eh eh eh...
Yeah, I'm not asking anything. *shakes head*
LOVE WAS NOT IN THE PLAN
Some were surprised at the revelations, most were not - due in no small part to said blatant flirting! It was great fun sneaking around at first but after it became public knowledge that we were seeing each other we just got closer and closer. My aunt warned me not to get my heart broken but unfortunately one cannot plan these things and Shannan and completely fell for each other, breaking all the rules and going completely against "the plan"! However it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all - although I don't consider us to have "lost" each other as I'm certain we'll be together again some day... the sooner the better. Watch this space!
LAST FEW DAYS - AND LAST EXAM
The last few days of the semester were some of the worst days of my life. I thought that I had a sore throat but it continued to get worse and worse, and nothing could alleviate the pain. As the days went on, it got more painful to swallow and to talk and I had to spend more and more time in bed. I had my final exam on the Saturday and only spent a few hours the day before studying for it. I took a number of risks in my study due to the lack of time, which did not pay off. However this is because of the ridiculous paper that was set by the most egotistical lecturer in the university, who just loves to see people fail so he can feel better than them in some way. I firmly believe that if I hadn't been sick and had studied for a solid two weeks for the exam, I would have done just as badly. I may pass, with the help of a bell curve, but if I don't I'm not sure how I'll get around the repeat.
SICKNESS AND GOODBYES
I continued to feel worse every day up to and including Saturday so I could not take part in the end of year party in the village hall to give a proper send-off to the visiting exchange students and to all the Irish students who are heading in various directions for work experience now. Worst of all I couldn't say goodbye properly to Shannan, and that hurt in a way I couldn't begin to describe. I could only talk to her for minutes at a time before having to return to bed Even while talking to her, I couldn't say as much as I wanted to say, and my brain was only operating at half capacity so I wasn't even thinking straight. But I did write in her journal and she wrote me the most amazing letter I've ever seen in my life, which makes me sure that nothing that had to be said has gone unsaid between us and has made me even more sure that we will be together again. On the morning she left I hadn't slept in 3 days, had been up since about 5:30 to say goodbye to Katie, and my talking had been reduced to whispering only. When I hugged her for the last time before she left and croaked my goodbye I cannot come close to conveying how much it hurt to have to let her go.
LEAVING IN A RUSH
My mother decided that I wasn't well enough to stay another night in Limerick and drove up to collect me. This left me very little time to gather my belongings together and clean my room for the last time. The end result of this was that I got practically no time to say goodbye to people. I told Marie I was leaving while getting the key of the bike shed from her. I went to house 57 just after the car was packed because that was the first opportunity I got. Jill and Lindsay were there so I had to greet them with "hello and goodbye" practically. As luck would have it Amanda had just stepped in the shower, but there was no way I was going to leave without one last hug from her - she's been the closest to me of all the exchange students over the course of the year. It was an emotional farewell.
GETTING WELL
My Dad brought me three new products on Saturday, designed for very severe pain, when he came to collect my stuff. All three failed entirely to give me any form of relief whatsoever. When my mother brought me home on Sunday she brought me straight to the doctor. Luckily it was a doctor who I know and whose style of medicine I am very much a fan of. Her catchphrase is "I'll be struck off for this but..." and I wouldn't have it any other, possibly more PC, way. She put me on a dose of drugs that my mother described as "Sledgehammer" and these, slowly but effectively, cured me over a period of five days. Which meant that I was feeling completely fit and better on Friday evening - and planning to drive to Cork on Saturday morning to move in for the summer and begin work after the weekend. Nice timing!
ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL
The description I gave of the semester must sound horrific but would I do it all again?
Yes.
This semester has been crazy but the experiences you have shape who you are and I think I'm a stronger person for having endured it. More importantly, this semester was the reason I met Shannan and for that reason alone I wouldn't change it for anything. Táim in ngrá leat, mo anam cara.
- Neil
P.S. If you got through all of this in one sitting, award yourself one million (1,000,000) points and a pat on the back.
THE WRATH OF CAD
The second half of the Spring 2005 semester was the most hectic few weeks of my life. One module in particular - CAD 1 - was the principal cause of this. The module is based around a fundamentally flawed program and the project given was considerably more difficult than any project set in that module to date, namely the modelling and animation of a mobile phone. This caused me, and many others in the class, to put in some very long days in the second-last week of the project, and a series of 5 days in the final week in which an average of at least 18 hours of work per day was achieved. This led to me getting 9 hours sleep in the last 5 days of the semester and both Mark and Dave seeing the sun rise through the window of the computer lab. This was very damaging to my health - and is more than likely the principal cause of my getting sick in the last few days of the semester and ruining the end of semester celebrations for me, as well as the last few days I had with Shannan.
BREAKING THE RULES
Shannan - the perfect foil for anything that the insane semester could throw at me and my reason for getting through it. I never hid that I had a huge crush on her from the time she moved in. The worst kept secret in Plassey history was the blatant flirting between us right from the outset. However the best kept secret in Plassey history was that on 3/31 to the Americans, or 31/3 to the Irish, we kissed... and then decided to continue to do so on a regular basis. This very definitely broke the "don't date a housemate" rule that is part of the unwritten but understood college code. Somehow we managed to keep it quiet for a whole three weeks until, on the day we decided to tell everyone anyway, Katie misinterpreted some noises she heard from my room and heralded the revelations with the immortal away message:
PsycoMezzma: I... just... *sigh*
I'm not... eh eh eh...
Yeah, I'm not asking anything. *shakes head*
LOVE WAS NOT IN THE PLAN
Some were surprised at the revelations, most were not - due in no small part to said blatant flirting! It was great fun sneaking around at first but after it became public knowledge that we were seeing each other we just got closer and closer. My aunt warned me not to get my heart broken but unfortunately one cannot plan these things and Shannan and completely fell for each other, breaking all the rules and going completely against "the plan"! However it is better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all - although I don't consider us to have "lost" each other as I'm certain we'll be together again some day... the sooner the better. Watch this space!
LAST FEW DAYS - AND LAST EXAM
The last few days of the semester were some of the worst days of my life. I thought that I had a sore throat but it continued to get worse and worse, and nothing could alleviate the pain. As the days went on, it got more painful to swallow and to talk and I had to spend more and more time in bed. I had my final exam on the Saturday and only spent a few hours the day before studying for it. I took a number of risks in my study due to the lack of time, which did not pay off. However this is because of the ridiculous paper that was set by the most egotistical lecturer in the university, who just loves to see people fail so he can feel better than them in some way. I firmly believe that if I hadn't been sick and had studied for a solid two weeks for the exam, I would have done just as badly. I may pass, with the help of a bell curve, but if I don't I'm not sure how I'll get around the repeat.
SICKNESS AND GOODBYES
I continued to feel worse every day up to and including Saturday so I could not take part in the end of year party in the village hall to give a proper send-off to the visiting exchange students and to all the Irish students who are heading in various directions for work experience now. Worst of all I couldn't say goodbye properly to Shannan, and that hurt in a way I couldn't begin to describe. I could only talk to her for minutes at a time before having to return to bed Even while talking to her, I couldn't say as much as I wanted to say, and my brain was only operating at half capacity so I wasn't even thinking straight. But I did write in her journal and she wrote me the most amazing letter I've ever seen in my life, which makes me sure that nothing that had to be said has gone unsaid between us and has made me even more sure that we will be together again. On the morning she left I hadn't slept in 3 days, had been up since about 5:30 to say goodbye to Katie, and my talking had been reduced to whispering only. When I hugged her for the last time before she left and croaked my goodbye I cannot come close to conveying how much it hurt to have to let her go.
LEAVING IN A RUSH
My mother decided that I wasn't well enough to stay another night in Limerick and drove up to collect me. This left me very little time to gather my belongings together and clean my room for the last time. The end result of this was that I got practically no time to say goodbye to people. I told Marie I was leaving while getting the key of the bike shed from her. I went to house 57 just after the car was packed because that was the first opportunity I got. Jill and Lindsay were there so I had to greet them with "hello and goodbye" practically. As luck would have it Amanda had just stepped in the shower, but there was no way I was going to leave without one last hug from her - she's been the closest to me of all the exchange students over the course of the year. It was an emotional farewell.
GETTING WELL
My Dad brought me three new products on Saturday, designed for very severe pain, when he came to collect my stuff. All three failed entirely to give me any form of relief whatsoever. When my mother brought me home on Sunday she brought me straight to the doctor. Luckily it was a doctor who I know and whose style of medicine I am very much a fan of. Her catchphrase is "I'll be struck off for this but..." and I wouldn't have it any other, possibly more PC, way. She put me on a dose of drugs that my mother described as "Sledgehammer" and these, slowly but effectively, cured me over a period of five days. Which meant that I was feeling completely fit and better on Friday evening - and planning to drive to Cork on Saturday morning to move in for the summer and begin work after the weekend. Nice timing!
ALL'S WELL THAT ENDS WELL
The description I gave of the semester must sound horrific but would I do it all again?
Yes.
This semester has been crazy but the experiences you have shape who you are and I think I'm a stronger person for having endured it. More importantly, this semester was the reason I met Shannan and for that reason alone I wouldn't change it for anything. Táim in ngrá leat, mo anam cara.
- Neil
P.S. If you got through all of this in one sitting, award yourself one million (1,000,000) points and a pat on the back.