trying your luck.

[plantations]

from the moment i saw him i refered to him as "my husband" and knew that in due time he and i would be a "we." that was over four years ago. sure enough, after knowing eachother for a matter of weeks we were madly in love like kids at sixteen are. he was my first everything and for years, my only thing. in the last year a lot has changed, he moved to san antonio, i moved to austin, he was in jail.. and a month or so ago he calls me.

he's dating someone named jennifer, i'm dating robby.. and he acts like everything's just fucking peachy. he's acting like we're friends, like all we've ever been is friends and i want some fucking closure. he dissappears for a year and i don't even get a goodbye, just another hello? where's my closure?

he's fucking everything up for me just like every other time he goes away and then shows up again when i've found someone new who makes me so fucking happy. but when he's in my life, that's it, it's him. it's always been him. but this is the first time he's ever dated anyone else so that tells me after four years, it's really over for us.

i get so jealous.
all i want is some closure.

i can't even kiss my amazing boyfriend anymore because i'm always thinking of glen.
god, i need to grow up and grow out of him. we aren't in highschool anymore.