I'm going to make it through, you'll see
I'm going to make it through, you'll see
I swear I'll prove you wrong
You haven't seen the last of me
I am way too strong
it's not impossible, you'll see.
you've never been inside my head
Well, I'm still pulling together from my latest bit of adversity, but on the whole, I'm much better than I was on two weeks ago. I must confess, I was a bit of a wreck for a week after I wrote that. It was the end of the semester, I'd been mentally exhausted by paper writing. Hadn't been exercising at all, and I was eating poorly. This week, I'm happy to say that everything I've eaten, I've cooked made at home. And I went swimming 4 times this week, walking to and from the poor (about a 20 minute walk). Thing about this journal, this blog, and the reason I keep at it is its kind of therapeutic to put what I'm thinking and feeling into writing. Which is a big reason why I keep at it, and have no plans to stop in the near future. It's also why I don't really care that much if anyone reads it or not, though it is nice when people do.
I don't want to keep harping on what happened, but it was more or less a series of events together that caused the dam to burst. The car troubles of the previous day, certainly inspired a bit of it. But it's also the uncertainty of my near future that troubled me. I hadn't, and still haven't been able to line up an internship, and its kind of been getting me down. However, I can do something about that. However, these events distracted me from what really matters. It gave me a reason to be moppy, and to not get anything done. I can do anything about what has already transpired, but I can still effect my future. So I'm about to put plan B into action. Plan B is to start inquiring about unadvertised internships. And I still have an application or two I'm waiting to hear back about. So I remain confident that I'll be able to arrange something before the beginning of the semester. And once I do, I'll be able to start my endgame to this crazy plan.
It is my goal to have a job by or soon after I graduate at the end of May. It's been my goal all along, and I'm very close to achieving it. I need to start applying now, but I really want to get that internship out of the way first. It's practically the only thing I still need to graduate (along with the two classes I am taking this semester.) I guess Plan C would be to do an internship over the summer, and graduate in the summer. I'm not sure if this is possible though. Or get a job, and use the first three months or so as my internship, just so I can get the degree and graduate. Cause If I can get a job without technically graduating, the degree will be a mere formality. Still, I'd rather do it over the spring, cause I'll have plenty of time.
Haven't had chance to do a wrap up last year, so I'll just do a brief one now. I can't really say it was as great as 2009, but it still had plenty of ups, and that's what I choose to remember now. My grades in school have just been getting better and better (last semester was all As and A-s!) The summer was pretty exciting for being broke as a joke. Went to lots of neat shows, like Cinematic Titanic, Conan's live tour and w00tstock. Didn't see as many concerts this year as in years past, but I did go to a festival, and that was....an experience. Also finally got to see live Cloud Cult show, and that made me very happy (its life affirming music!). And I even made it to a convention and see lots of old friends, so that was great. I'll also remember 2010 as the year I really started watching Dr. Who, a show so up my alley, I'm puzzled as to why I haven't been watching earlier. All in all, not a bad year at all.
2011 will be interesting, but at least it should start out good. Went to the Hold Steady on New Years eve, and that bled into the New Year, so it counts. Plus there was confetti and balloons dropped. And I had champagne for the fifth year in a row. February will be busy. Got both a Decemberists show and a Cinematic Titanic show coming up. Who knows what else, but its hard to say not knowing where I'll be at after May. Maybe/ Probably in the mid-west, its also likely I'll migrate to the coasts. I might even leave the country (though not very likely). But I got to keep myself motivated, and not get wrapped up in the small stuff. I need to rise above it. Maybe I'm just fooling myself, but I'd rather believe the lie. But whatever happens, I'll be sure to document it here, at least every two weeks if not more.
I swear I'll prove you wrong
You haven't seen the last of me
I am way too strong
it's not impossible, you'll see.
you've never been inside my head
Well, I'm still pulling together from my latest bit of adversity, but on the whole, I'm much better than I was on two weeks ago. I must confess, I was a bit of a wreck for a week after I wrote that. It was the end of the semester, I'd been mentally exhausted by paper writing. Hadn't been exercising at all, and I was eating poorly. This week, I'm happy to say that everything I've eaten, I've cooked made at home. And I went swimming 4 times this week, walking to and from the poor (about a 20 minute walk). Thing about this journal, this blog, and the reason I keep at it is its kind of therapeutic to put what I'm thinking and feeling into writing. Which is a big reason why I keep at it, and have no plans to stop in the near future. It's also why I don't really care that much if anyone reads it or not, though it is nice when people do.
I don't want to keep harping on what happened, but it was more or less a series of events together that caused the dam to burst. The car troubles of the previous day, certainly inspired a bit of it. But it's also the uncertainty of my near future that troubled me. I hadn't, and still haven't been able to line up an internship, and its kind of been getting me down. However, I can do something about that. However, these events distracted me from what really matters. It gave me a reason to be moppy, and to not get anything done. I can do anything about what has already transpired, but I can still effect my future. So I'm about to put plan B into action. Plan B is to start inquiring about unadvertised internships. And I still have an application or two I'm waiting to hear back about. So I remain confident that I'll be able to arrange something before the beginning of the semester. And once I do, I'll be able to start my endgame to this crazy plan.
It is my goal to have a job by or soon after I graduate at the end of May. It's been my goal all along, and I'm very close to achieving it. I need to start applying now, but I really want to get that internship out of the way first. It's practically the only thing I still need to graduate (along with the two classes I am taking this semester.) I guess Plan C would be to do an internship over the summer, and graduate in the summer. I'm not sure if this is possible though. Or get a job, and use the first three months or so as my internship, just so I can get the degree and graduate. Cause If I can get a job without technically graduating, the degree will be a mere formality. Still, I'd rather do it over the spring, cause I'll have plenty of time.
Haven't had chance to do a wrap up last year, so I'll just do a brief one now. I can't really say it was as great as 2009, but it still had plenty of ups, and that's what I choose to remember now. My grades in school have just been getting better and better (last semester was all As and A-s!) The summer was pretty exciting for being broke as a joke. Went to lots of neat shows, like Cinematic Titanic, Conan's live tour and w00tstock. Didn't see as many concerts this year as in years past, but I did go to a festival, and that was....an experience. Also finally got to see live Cloud Cult show, and that made me very happy (its life affirming music!). And I even made it to a convention and see lots of old friends, so that was great. I'll also remember 2010 as the year I really started watching Dr. Who, a show so up my alley, I'm puzzled as to why I haven't been watching earlier. All in all, not a bad year at all.
2011 will be interesting, but at least it should start out good. Went to the Hold Steady on New Years eve, and that bled into the New Year, so it counts. Plus there was confetti and balloons dropped. And I had champagne for the fifth year in a row. February will be busy. Got both a Decemberists show and a Cinematic Titanic show coming up. Who knows what else, but its hard to say not knowing where I'll be at after May. Maybe/ Probably in the mid-west, its also likely I'll migrate to the coasts. I might even leave the country (though not very likely). But I got to keep myself motivated, and not get wrapped up in the small stuff. I need to rise above it. Maybe I'm just fooling myself, but I'd rather believe the lie. But whatever happens, I'll be sure to document it here, at least every two weeks if not more.