Drift Away, new chap....sorta
Title: Away
Summary: Can two broken sparks mend each other?
Rating: T
Warnings: Character death.
Author Notes: This was inspired by taralyndens "Primus blessed". Go read it - it's amazing.
This is the second and last part of the prologue. Now that this is done the story can finally start. Next: chap. 1 - "The end is just the beginning"
Ah! hear the dirge that all mankind must learn: Place not on earth thy trust, For dust thou art, to dust shalt thou return, Dust unto dust.
I was told once that there are no winners at war.
I resisted the urge to correct them - to correct you actually.
You were devastatingly right. You always were.
About everything.
You tried to include me in everything. To make me more 'social'.
To show me how to live.
Well, congratulations - you have succeeded.
And not only did you teach me, but you gave me a reason to live as well.
A reason you selfishly took away when you left.
And I did not even feel it - I just woke up after recharge and knew you were gone.
How illogical is that?
How many times have I told you to be careful?
Exactly 1, 354, 506 times in total.
You should have listened to me.
Or maybe I should have listen to you. It was like you knew this would be our last encounter.
Yet, another thing you where right about.
Optimus told me how you died. It must have been quite an adventure for you.
You died honorably.
Glitch.
There is no such thing as a honorable death.
Because there is nothing honorable about dieing.
Nothing.
You never feared death. Never.
Because.
Just because you feared more living a life where you never were truly alive.
Only you could come up with something as contradicting as that.
Do you remember?
Do you remember the night we bonded?
You promised that you will never hurt me.
Never.
And yet here you are braking that promise.
I still wonder. Is it true that your life flashes before you die?
Did you liked what you saw?
Do you regret anything?
Because, sadly...
strangely...
….I don't.
Death is a natural course of life. It's simple.
Clean.
Logical.
But that doesn't change the fact the you're gone.
And I'm here.
Without you.
…..
…..
…..
…..Death must be such a relief to you. And I am grateful for that.
But what about me?
What about me?
What's supposed to happen to me now once you go in to the light? I have never acted in a way that would benefit only me.
But I'm starting right now.
And I'm going to shout out loud :
What about me you selfish glitch?
Me.
Me.
Me.
Here.
Without you.
Alone.
Do you honestly believe that I would move on? Continue functioning without you?
If you honestly believe that, then, beloved - you are more glitched then I though.
Did you know?
Did you know that every time I heard you talk how you would gladly sacrifice your life for someone dear to you...
Did you know that my spark clenched in fear?
That every mission you went on I suffocated, not knowing if you were stupid enough to do such a thing...
...To me.
Apparently, Primus didn't hear my last prayer.
Dying is like coming to the end of a long novel - you only regret it if the ride was enjoyable and left you wanting more.
And I want much, much more beloved.
Did you know?
Did you know that there is a difference between death and dying?
I know.
Death comes in an instant. It's peaceful. Calm.
But dieing...
You count the second until that faithful hour where your sparks fades out.
Do you know that I'm counting right now?
How am I supposed to lead a war - protect those needing protection?
How am I supposed to do that if I can's save the person who is most important to me?
Why are you silent?
You know, they say death doesn't bargain. And I'm starting to believe that.
Because if it did you would be immortal.
Wait.
Isn't our species considered as such?
This is such an oxymoron.
If we truly were deathless then how come I'm surrounded by it?
How come I'm surrounded by death?
Obviously the one who said it is nothing but a fool.
Did I mention that I'm not in pain?
Did I mention that I hate it?
Because I would gladly trade this hollowness for something, anything.
Even if that anything is pain.
I welcome it.
It would appear that a broken bond is nothing like those stories you loved so much.
Pity.
You always were such a hopeless romantic.
…..
…..
…..
I love you.
I never really did say it to often.
But you knew.
You knew that I would gladly rip out my spark if need be for you.
And you knew.
And that simple thought made me love you even more.
If that was even possible.
They say that the dead are never truly gone as long as we remember them.
Again, I want to punch the one who said that.
Because you left me.
You left me here.
Alone. Alone. Alone. Alone.
You always knew that you wont outlive this war.
And now, as I stand here, before your grave, giving the longest speech of my life, I have one thing to say:
You were right.
You were always right - and proved it.
Are you happy now, Jazz?