The Ultimate Funhouse Chapter 1
Chapter One
“I’m not having this argument with you again!” My mother snapped at me, I rolled my eyes at her and headed to my room while she continued to holler and shriek. I grumbled about being nineteen years old and living my life the way I wanted to. My mother didn’t understand that she had already lived hers, I think it was very selfish of her to want to live mine too. I wouldn’t call myself rebellious, just thoroughly pissed off at the situation I found myself in. When my father came home from work he would hear my mother’s insistent shrieking and come at me too, they believed on presenting a united front.
I stormed into my bedroom and slammed the door, the loud noise it made satisfied me. My little sister looked up from the book she was reading, her stare was blank but I knew what she was thinking, she was thinking exactly what I was thinking. “I’m not rude.” I said defensively, who was she to judge me, she was only fifteen years old, plus she was pretty and smart so she never had anything to worry about, our parents never compared her to me, it was always me they were screaming, ‘Why can’t you be more like your sister’, at. Hell I was the eldest.
“I didn’t say anything.” Diamond pushed a few stray strands of relaxed hair from her face and went back to reading. I glowered at her and flopped onto the bed. “I’m just saying, this was your own fault.”
“Hey, it was Lil Wayne, who passes up free front row tickets to a Weezy concert?”
My sister closed her book and sat up, “Me. Plus, Lil Wayne isn’t the one being who’s in trouble.”
I raised an eyebrow, “You know, you have a point there.” I grinned, “But it was awesome! I have no regrets.”
“Do you ever?”
I smirked and rolled onto my side. The concert was amazing, my friend Charla won four tickets from a radio show and she gave me two so I invited this guy that I’ve been crushing on forever. Of course my parents insisted that I go to some kind of Gospel concert that same night, yeah, as if. I conveniently had an epileptic seizure and had to stay home, I was also gracious enough to tell my mother that I would be fine and she could feel free to go with Daddy and the rest of their brood.
Once my family was gone I changed into my little red dress and fixed my hair, at ten the guy Omar pulled up in front of my house, I climbed into his dubbed Impala and we headed off to the concert. While the rap star screamed into the mike, I gyrated my behind against my date, my best friend did the same. The concert ended shortly after four in the morning but we were still hyped so we went to a nightclub for a couple drinks and some more dancing. It was shortly after seven when we were finally all partied out and I went home with Omar to catch some sleep.
“Where were you?” My little sister asked.
“I went to Omar’s place.” I told her boldly, I rolled over so I could see her, “I know what you’re thinking. Let me tell you this Dee, nothing happened, I made sure that he was too drunk to function. I’m not stupid.”
My mother’s frustrated voice drifted through the closed door, “I never had any trouble out of Ruby, Jade or Opal and I don’t have any trouble with Diamond, why God, why is Topaz such a hassle?”
Diamond looked at me, eyebrow raised, I cut my eye at her and licked my lips. Momma was intentionally standing by our bedroom door, she was trying to make me feel guilty but I wasn’t.
“I swear her real daughter was swapped with me at the hospital. Somewhere there’s a breakdancing, party-holic family who has a passive little lamb for a daughter.” I got off the bed and pulled off my tight red dress. My three sisters and brother are the perfect children, every parent dreams of having children like them. My brother Jade is a successful lawyer, my older sister Ruby is a craniologist and Opal, the other one, is a psychologist, Diamond is an honor roll student.
“You know, Momma and Pops act like they didn’t have three kids before they finally got married.”
“And along came us?” Diamond commented, “You’ve just got to be careful out there. You got into a car with a guy who was drunk and you went home with him, anything could have happened, what if he’d raped you.”
I pulled a flip-open dagger from between my breasts and pointed at the can on pepper spray that was strapped to my thigh by a leather garter. Diamond’s eyes opened wide, her mouth fell down like a trapdoor. I’d bought the blade and the pepper spray when girls were being kidnapped, raped and murdered around the college campus, then I made it a habit to carry the things on me at all times because I loved to party and like Dee said, anything could happen.
“You know what Dee, maybe I can’t get married in white but I’m careful. I’m not gonna bring home any kids unless I’ve got a husband, I’m not going to bring home any diseases either. And I’m sick of everyone butting into my life. Haven’t you ever noticed that nothing I do is good enough for our parents? They never compliment my art and photography, they just bitch and moan about what grades I get in math and English.”
“You speak English don’t you?” My little sister said in a pathetic attempt at being sarcastic.
I frowned at her and pulled on a white shirt and pair of baggy jeans. “Screw you!” I pulled out a knapsack and started throwing clothes into it, “And screw this whole damn family!”
“Tope where…?”
I pulled out my cellphone and sent a text message to Charla telling her to pick me up at the corner. “I’m going to Char’s place, when Daddy gets home hell is gonna rise.” It always did where I was concerned.
“You’re just going to make it worst.” My little sister sand and opened her book again.
“That’s right, read your little book so you can say that you were too distracted to see me hop out of the window.” I swung the knapsack onto my pack and flung the window open, my father threatened to cut down the tree that grew right beside the window but he never did for whatever reason.
I gave my sister one last look before I sprang out of the window and climbed down the tree. I loved Diamond, even though we were so different she was the one person in this family who got me…not completely but there was some understanding between us. It could be because of the closeness of our age compared to the gap between us and our elder siblings. Opal, the youngest of the others is thirteen years older than me, then there’s Ruby who has fifteen years on me and Jade who was eighteen when I was born. They are more like my parents than anything else, especially Ruby who thought she knew it all, it’s fair to say that I hate her, my big sister made my blood crawl, I hated the way she spoke and acted, like she was better than me. She wasn’t better than me, she was the one who got pregnant at sixteen, even though the baby was still birth my parents never forgot the embarrassment they felt, I understand that a lot of their actions are born from the fear that the same thing would happen to me, the fear that their parenting skills would be questioned in this close-knit community, but the biggest fear of all was what their church members would think if they had not just one but two pregnant teen daughters. Unlike everyone else, nothing anyone said mattered to me, nobody but my parents. I long to be accepted by them, I crave some positive attention, just a little bit of love was all I desired.
I walked to the bus stop that was on a corner about a mile away from my house, Char must have been in the area because she was sitting in her car, the radio turned all the way up, head swinging from side to side, brown hair with blond highlights swishing to the rhythm. I grinned and got in on the passenger side.
“Parents had a meltdown?”
“Well Momma did, Daddy’s at work.”
“And you’re leaving again? Don’t you think that your provoke them just a little?”
I grinned, “Yeah, if I didn’t they’d probably forget that they had me.”
She laughed and pulled away from the curb, I turned the volume up a little more and sang along with Brittany Spears. Circus, I loved that song.
When we stopped at a red light Char handed me a brightly colored flyer. “The CD came with this. A carnival’s coming to town; the biggest attraction is The Ultimate Funhouse.” She grinned, “A friend of mine went in once, she said it was like the first hit of a drug, she lived all her wildest dreams.”
“The Funhouse?”
“Yeah, I think they spray some kinda gas inside to make people spaz out.” Char laughed and turned the volume up even louder, “So are you going to invite Omar tonight?”
I shook my head, “Nope, I’m probably gonna call Logan up.”
“Tope, if you’re not going to be with my cousin just leave him alone okay, quit playing with his heart.”
I chuckled, “Fine, maybe I’ll just go alone.” I smiled and gaze out of the window, “You know Logan’s cute, he just wants more out of our relationship than I’m willing to give.”
Cute to describe Logan was an understatement; he looked like fricken Ian Somerhalder, but he was twenty-five and wanting to settle down. My parents loved him; he was exactly what they were looking for in a son-in-law with the added bonus of the pretty little biracial babies we would have. A groan wormed it’s way out of me, I have to admit that the problem I had with Logan was probably just the fact that my parents adored him, maybe I did provoke them, I went out with guys like Omar because he was such a gangster, somebody who would make my family’s blood crawl, somebody who would send my mother crazy. Why did I do it? I told myself that it was so they would give me some attention even though it was unwanted and negative, but truth be told I hated the constant arguing.
I loved Diamond but I was jealous of her, so bitterly jealous! Momma had her when I was four years old and immediately all of my aunts and grandparents and cousins…everyone who used to dote on me directed their attention to her, they marveled over how pretty she was. Then she went to school and started getting grades I didn’t even see in my dreams, she got moved from fourth grade to fifth grade because she was so smart, and later she got moved from eighth grade to ninth. I never thought it was fair for her to be both pretty and smart. Her certificates and trophies of academic excellence adorn every wall and surface of our living room and hallway.
I shifted and flung one of my feet onto the dashboard, folded my hands in my lap and continued to gaze out at the passing cars while my miserable thoughts consumed me. I’ve never felt pretty, nobody had ever told me so, nobody but this geek in eight grade but he was desperate so he doesn’t count. Most of my insecurities came from my home life; my younger sister was always the cute one, the lovely one, the beautiful one. I was a mere shadow once she was in the room. We were always Topaz and her pretty little sister, my parents’ friends would say, “So how is Topaz? Great, and what about the pretty little one?” I went through a chubby stage, and with puberty came acne and braces. I wasn’t always outgoing and wild, that came later. I used to be just like my sister quiet and reserved, hiding my ugly behind books, a canvas or a huge camera. I’ve heard people that I trusted wholeheartedly murmur about how strange I looked, what stuck was the thanksgiving my favorite aunt told me to stop eating so much because I was fat, black and ugly, that devastated me and none of my parents said anything about it, they just giggled with that aunt and brushed it off as if she were joking, as if they were blind to the seriousness in her eyes and the frown that appeared on her wrinkled lips. That was the turning point in my life. I did everything I could to loose weight after that, I chased after the popular guys, the ones who were so handsome that if you got one of them, the entire school would think that you’re pretty, even though you were far from it. They lived of the attention I gave them, it helped them to thrive, and they used me because of my weakness, took advantage of me. That was how I learnt the difference between love and sex, which was when I made another change to my character; I learnt to use my words as weapons, as armor. I became a good judge of person, refused to be lied to and deceived again. My parents were the reasons for this, if only they’d defended me or at least said something to comfort me, and now they have the audacity to chastise me for what I’ve become.
“Tope? Did you hear me?”
“Huh?”
“I was asking what you were wearing tonight.”
I shrugged, “I’m wearing whatever I put in my bag. I’ve still got toiletries at your place don’t I?”
“Yeah.”
“When was the last time you heard from your parents?”
“This morning, they call all the time. Daddy is dating again and Momma got a dog.”
“I’d think that their divorce would have left you devastated.”
Char chuckled, “Why? I haven’t lived with them in forever, they sent me away when the problems started so I know it’s not my fault, they’re two grown people, if they can’t work out their own issues then what could I possibly do?”
“Good point.”
Char was always bounced around from one family member to the next ever since she was ten years old. When she was thirteen she moved in with an aunt who didn’t have any children, so her aunt spoiled her. As soon as we graduated high school Char had a new car and an apartment. She doesn’t go to college, she doesn’t work, she has it made.
“How’s your art thing going?” Char asked as we turned on to her streets.
“It’s going; I’ve got about three more pieces to complete for the gallery.” My voice trailed off as yet another tortured thought entered my mind, my father doesn’t think that art is a career field, he says that I’m wasting my time and his money. Neither of my parents ever came out to support me, my artwork hung on walls while strangers admired them, marveled over them. Since last semester I’d started paying my own fee with the money I’d made from expeditions and galleries. I knew that I had talent and I knew my work was good if people wanted to pay me more than two grand for them, I didn’t tell my father that I was paying my tuition though, instead I took the money he gave me and put it back on his account after he’d forgotten about. I didn’t like feeling like I owed anybody anything. My brother did come to the last art function, he admitted that he was impressed with my work and even bought a couple pieces, that was the highlight of my life, a little bit of positivity from somebody in my family.
“What are you thinking about?” Char asked while we hopped out of the car and headed to her apartment.
“Things.” I stuck my hands in my pocket, Char and I went up the stairs in silence-she always avoided the elevator for some reason- the silence was only broken by the sound of the keys jingling in the locks.
Char lived in an upscale apartment, her aunt made it big when her rich husband died from a sudden heart attack shortly after they were married, because he had no kids his wife got everything, including his prominent fashion business. I don’t think that Char’s aunt was heartbroken although she was upset that she didn’t have any kids and she remained loyal to her husband…even after he was dead. Char’s living room was made of glass walls and expensive furnishings; she had a wonderful view of the park and the lovely side of the city. I spend hours sitting by the window or on the deck just gazing at the wonders that surrounds us, skyscrapers built by men, the serene park with the large pond that glittered in the sunlight and reflected a million stars at night. I could only dream of living like this, my parents had money but they were fugal, they spent money only on the necessities, and my older siblings do the same. I never had a car because my father says that our family needs only one car, so he drops me to school in the morning, then he drops off my sister, sometimes Momma would have the car and she would drop the rest of us off where we needed to go then she would do her own errands. I have to admit the one car system works pretty well, we don’t spend much money on gas and we’re helping the environment. My parents never lend me the car unless it’s an emergency or if I have to do their biddings, they don’t trust me enough. They fear that I would wreck it or have somebody wreck it for me, I think they’re both crazy to think that I’d ruin their vehicle and have them jump down my throat. I had decided a long time ago that when I started working, the first thing I would do is buy myself an apartment and move out, then I would buy a car so that I can be free of my parents and their strictness.
I dropped my things beside the door and went to dump my body onto the couch, my stomach growled loudly and I changed directions and ran for the kitchen. The cupboards and fridge were usually empty, today I was lucky enough to find a box of Frosted Flakes sitting on the kitchen table and a box of milk in the fridge. I made myself a big bowl and wolfed it down, then I washed the dishes and wandered into the front room where my friend was sitting, legs curled under her body, on one of the fancy black leather sofas, telephone clamped onto her right ear while she giggled and cooed.
David Lexum came into her life one sunny day in the summer; it was lust at first sight. He was six feet seven inches tall; his dream is to get drafted to the NBA. He had a mass of curly black hair on his head that complimented his strong bronze body and dark deep set eyes, he looked like he walked off the cover of the magazine and he gazed at my friend like she was breakfast. We were at the bar on a beach, and he climbed onto the stool beside her, the two immediately began flirting and I was a bit put out by their antics. From that day on the two were attached at the hips, you hardly went anywhere and saw one without the other. David and I became fast friends, I annoyed him constantly to hear his sexy Brazilian accent, and he in turn would tickle me till I cried or hold me upside down until my face started to change color, but I was always a third wheel. As I watched my gush over her boyfriend’s voice, I knew I would be alone in this apartment tonight, they never told me that they didn’t want me around, but they always left me alone, preferring each other’s company.
I clicked on the TV and flipped through the channels until I found something good to watch, Jerry Springer, I always had a good laugh at the dips that came on that show to make themselves look like complete jackasses. I was pretty sure that they were well paid and their little acts well-rehearsed; because there was no way any human could be that stupid.
I reclined on the leather sofa, it wasn’t long before I started to sweat wherever my skin touched the sofa, Charla continued to giggle, I watched as she made cute faces that David couldn’t see, I smiled at her, glad that she was happy and wishing that I could find happiness myself. My mind went back to Logan; he was perfect so why didn’t I like him that way? Why couldn’t I fall in love with him?
“I’m not having this argument with you again!” My mother snapped at me, I rolled my eyes at her and headed to my room while she continued to holler and shriek. I grumbled about being nineteen years old and living my life the way I wanted to. My mother didn’t understand that she had already lived hers, I think it was very selfish of her to want to live mine too. I wouldn’t call myself rebellious, just thoroughly pissed off at the situation I found myself in. When my father came home from work he would hear my mother’s insistent shrieking and come at me too, they believed on presenting a united front.
I stormed into my bedroom and slammed the door, the loud noise it made satisfied me. My little sister looked up from the book she was reading, her stare was blank but I knew what she was thinking, she was thinking exactly what I was thinking. “I’m not rude.” I said defensively, who was she to judge me, she was only fifteen years old, plus she was pretty and smart so she never had anything to worry about, our parents never compared her to me, it was always me they were screaming, ‘Why can’t you be more like your sister’, at. Hell I was the eldest.
“I didn’t say anything.” Diamond pushed a few stray strands of relaxed hair from her face and went back to reading. I glowered at her and flopped onto the bed. “I’m just saying, this was your own fault.”
“Hey, it was Lil Wayne, who passes up free front row tickets to a Weezy concert?”
My sister closed her book and sat up, “Me. Plus, Lil Wayne isn’t the one being who’s in trouble.”
I raised an eyebrow, “You know, you have a point there.” I grinned, “But it was awesome! I have no regrets.”
“Do you ever?”
I smirked and rolled onto my side. The concert was amazing, my friend Charla won four tickets from a radio show and she gave me two so I invited this guy that I’ve been crushing on forever. Of course my parents insisted that I go to some kind of Gospel concert that same night, yeah, as if. I conveniently had an epileptic seizure and had to stay home, I was also gracious enough to tell my mother that I would be fine and she could feel free to go with Daddy and the rest of their brood.
Once my family was gone I changed into my little red dress and fixed my hair, at ten the guy Omar pulled up in front of my house, I climbed into his dubbed Impala and we headed off to the concert. While the rap star screamed into the mike, I gyrated my behind against my date, my best friend did the same. The concert ended shortly after four in the morning but we were still hyped so we went to a nightclub for a couple drinks and some more dancing. It was shortly after seven when we were finally all partied out and I went home with Omar to catch some sleep.
“Where were you?” My little sister asked.
“I went to Omar’s place.” I told her boldly, I rolled over so I could see her, “I know what you’re thinking. Let me tell you this Dee, nothing happened, I made sure that he was too drunk to function. I’m not stupid.”
My mother’s frustrated voice drifted through the closed door, “I never had any trouble out of Ruby, Jade or Opal and I don’t have any trouble with Diamond, why God, why is Topaz such a hassle?”
Diamond looked at me, eyebrow raised, I cut my eye at her and licked my lips. Momma was intentionally standing by our bedroom door, she was trying to make me feel guilty but I wasn’t.
“I swear her real daughter was swapped with me at the hospital. Somewhere there’s a breakdancing, party-holic family who has a passive little lamb for a daughter.” I got off the bed and pulled off my tight red dress. My three sisters and brother are the perfect children, every parent dreams of having children like them. My brother Jade is a successful lawyer, my older sister Ruby is a craniologist and Opal, the other one, is a psychologist, Diamond is an honor roll student.
“You know, Momma and Pops act like they didn’t have three kids before they finally got married.”
“And along came us?” Diamond commented, “You’ve just got to be careful out there. You got into a car with a guy who was drunk and you went home with him, anything could have happened, what if he’d raped you.”
I pulled a flip-open dagger from between my breasts and pointed at the can on pepper spray that was strapped to my thigh by a leather garter. Diamond’s eyes opened wide, her mouth fell down like a trapdoor. I’d bought the blade and the pepper spray when girls were being kidnapped, raped and murdered around the college campus, then I made it a habit to carry the things on me at all times because I loved to party and like Dee said, anything could happen.
“You know what Dee, maybe I can’t get married in white but I’m careful. I’m not gonna bring home any kids unless I’ve got a husband, I’m not going to bring home any diseases either. And I’m sick of everyone butting into my life. Haven’t you ever noticed that nothing I do is good enough for our parents? They never compliment my art and photography, they just bitch and moan about what grades I get in math and English.”
“You speak English don’t you?” My little sister said in a pathetic attempt at being sarcastic.
I frowned at her and pulled on a white shirt and pair of baggy jeans. “Screw you!” I pulled out a knapsack and started throwing clothes into it, “And screw this whole damn family!”
“Tope where…?”
I pulled out my cellphone and sent a text message to Charla telling her to pick me up at the corner. “I’m going to Char’s place, when Daddy gets home hell is gonna rise.” It always did where I was concerned.
“You’re just going to make it worst.” My little sister sand and opened her book again.
“That’s right, read your little book so you can say that you were too distracted to see me hop out of the window.” I swung the knapsack onto my pack and flung the window open, my father threatened to cut down the tree that grew right beside the window but he never did for whatever reason.
I gave my sister one last look before I sprang out of the window and climbed down the tree. I loved Diamond, even though we were so different she was the one person in this family who got me…not completely but there was some understanding between us. It could be because of the closeness of our age compared to the gap between us and our elder siblings. Opal, the youngest of the others is thirteen years older than me, then there’s Ruby who has fifteen years on me and Jade who was eighteen when I was born. They are more like my parents than anything else, especially Ruby who thought she knew it all, it’s fair to say that I hate her, my big sister made my blood crawl, I hated the way she spoke and acted, like she was better than me. She wasn’t better than me, she was the one who got pregnant at sixteen, even though the baby was still birth my parents never forgot the embarrassment they felt, I understand that a lot of their actions are born from the fear that the same thing would happen to me, the fear that their parenting skills would be questioned in this close-knit community, but the biggest fear of all was what their church members would think if they had not just one but two pregnant teen daughters. Unlike everyone else, nothing anyone said mattered to me, nobody but my parents. I long to be accepted by them, I crave some positive attention, just a little bit of love was all I desired.
I walked to the bus stop that was on a corner about a mile away from my house, Char must have been in the area because she was sitting in her car, the radio turned all the way up, head swinging from side to side, brown hair with blond highlights swishing to the rhythm. I grinned and got in on the passenger side.
“Parents had a meltdown?”
“Well Momma did, Daddy’s at work.”
“And you’re leaving again? Don’t you think that your provoke them just a little?”
I grinned, “Yeah, if I didn’t they’d probably forget that they had me.”
She laughed and pulled away from the curb, I turned the volume up a little more and sang along with Brittany Spears. Circus, I loved that song.
When we stopped at a red light Char handed me a brightly colored flyer. “The CD came with this. A carnival’s coming to town; the biggest attraction is The Ultimate Funhouse.” She grinned, “A friend of mine went in once, she said it was like the first hit of a drug, she lived all her wildest dreams.”
“The Funhouse?”
“Yeah, I think they spray some kinda gas inside to make people spaz out.” Char laughed and turned the volume up even louder, “So are you going to invite Omar tonight?”
I shook my head, “Nope, I’m probably gonna call Logan up.”
“Tope, if you’re not going to be with my cousin just leave him alone okay, quit playing with his heart.”
I chuckled, “Fine, maybe I’ll just go alone.” I smiled and gaze out of the window, “You know Logan’s cute, he just wants more out of our relationship than I’m willing to give.”
Cute to describe Logan was an understatement; he looked like fricken Ian Somerhalder, but he was twenty-five and wanting to settle down. My parents loved him; he was exactly what they were looking for in a son-in-law with the added bonus of the pretty little biracial babies we would have. A groan wormed it’s way out of me, I have to admit that the problem I had with Logan was probably just the fact that my parents adored him, maybe I did provoke them, I went out with guys like Omar because he was such a gangster, somebody who would make my family’s blood crawl, somebody who would send my mother crazy. Why did I do it? I told myself that it was so they would give me some attention even though it was unwanted and negative, but truth be told I hated the constant arguing.
I loved Diamond but I was jealous of her, so bitterly jealous! Momma had her when I was four years old and immediately all of my aunts and grandparents and cousins…everyone who used to dote on me directed their attention to her, they marveled over how pretty she was. Then she went to school and started getting grades I didn’t even see in my dreams, she got moved from fourth grade to fifth grade because she was so smart, and later she got moved from eighth grade to ninth. I never thought it was fair for her to be both pretty and smart. Her certificates and trophies of academic excellence adorn every wall and surface of our living room and hallway.
I shifted and flung one of my feet onto the dashboard, folded my hands in my lap and continued to gaze out at the passing cars while my miserable thoughts consumed me. I’ve never felt pretty, nobody had ever told me so, nobody but this geek in eight grade but he was desperate so he doesn’t count. Most of my insecurities came from my home life; my younger sister was always the cute one, the lovely one, the beautiful one. I was a mere shadow once she was in the room. We were always Topaz and her pretty little sister, my parents’ friends would say, “So how is Topaz? Great, and what about the pretty little one?” I went through a chubby stage, and with puberty came acne and braces. I wasn’t always outgoing and wild, that came later. I used to be just like my sister quiet and reserved, hiding my ugly behind books, a canvas or a huge camera. I’ve heard people that I trusted wholeheartedly murmur about how strange I looked, what stuck was the thanksgiving my favorite aunt told me to stop eating so much because I was fat, black and ugly, that devastated me and none of my parents said anything about it, they just giggled with that aunt and brushed it off as if she were joking, as if they were blind to the seriousness in her eyes and the frown that appeared on her wrinkled lips. That was the turning point in my life. I did everything I could to loose weight after that, I chased after the popular guys, the ones who were so handsome that if you got one of them, the entire school would think that you’re pretty, even though you were far from it. They lived of the attention I gave them, it helped them to thrive, and they used me because of my weakness, took advantage of me. That was how I learnt the difference between love and sex, which was when I made another change to my character; I learnt to use my words as weapons, as armor. I became a good judge of person, refused to be lied to and deceived again. My parents were the reasons for this, if only they’d defended me or at least said something to comfort me, and now they have the audacity to chastise me for what I’ve become.
“Tope? Did you hear me?”
“Huh?”
“I was asking what you were wearing tonight.”
I shrugged, “I’m wearing whatever I put in my bag. I’ve still got toiletries at your place don’t I?”
“Yeah.”
“When was the last time you heard from your parents?”
“This morning, they call all the time. Daddy is dating again and Momma got a dog.”
“I’d think that their divorce would have left you devastated.”
Char chuckled, “Why? I haven’t lived with them in forever, they sent me away when the problems started so I know it’s not my fault, they’re two grown people, if they can’t work out their own issues then what could I possibly do?”
“Good point.”
Char was always bounced around from one family member to the next ever since she was ten years old. When she was thirteen she moved in with an aunt who didn’t have any children, so her aunt spoiled her. As soon as we graduated high school Char had a new car and an apartment. She doesn’t go to college, she doesn’t work, she has it made.
“How’s your art thing going?” Char asked as we turned on to her streets.
“It’s going; I’ve got about three more pieces to complete for the gallery.” My voice trailed off as yet another tortured thought entered my mind, my father doesn’t think that art is a career field, he says that I’m wasting my time and his money. Neither of my parents ever came out to support me, my artwork hung on walls while strangers admired them, marveled over them. Since last semester I’d started paying my own fee with the money I’d made from expeditions and galleries. I knew that I had talent and I knew my work was good if people wanted to pay me more than two grand for them, I didn’t tell my father that I was paying my tuition though, instead I took the money he gave me and put it back on his account after he’d forgotten about. I didn’t like feeling like I owed anybody anything. My brother did come to the last art function, he admitted that he was impressed with my work and even bought a couple pieces, that was the highlight of my life, a little bit of positivity from somebody in my family.
“What are you thinking about?” Char asked while we hopped out of the car and headed to her apartment.
“Things.” I stuck my hands in my pocket, Char and I went up the stairs in silence-she always avoided the elevator for some reason- the silence was only broken by the sound of the keys jingling in the locks.
Char lived in an upscale apartment, her aunt made it big when her rich husband died from a sudden heart attack shortly after they were married, because he had no kids his wife got everything, including his prominent fashion business. I don’t think that Char’s aunt was heartbroken although she was upset that she didn’t have any kids and she remained loyal to her husband…even after he was dead. Char’s living room was made of glass walls and expensive furnishings; she had a wonderful view of the park and the lovely side of the city. I spend hours sitting by the window or on the deck just gazing at the wonders that surrounds us, skyscrapers built by men, the serene park with the large pond that glittered in the sunlight and reflected a million stars at night. I could only dream of living like this, my parents had money but they were fugal, they spent money only on the necessities, and my older siblings do the same. I never had a car because my father says that our family needs only one car, so he drops me to school in the morning, then he drops off my sister, sometimes Momma would have the car and she would drop the rest of us off where we needed to go then she would do her own errands. I have to admit the one car system works pretty well, we don’t spend much money on gas and we’re helping the environment. My parents never lend me the car unless it’s an emergency or if I have to do their biddings, they don’t trust me enough. They fear that I would wreck it or have somebody wreck it for me, I think they’re both crazy to think that I’d ruin their vehicle and have them jump down my throat. I had decided a long time ago that when I started working, the first thing I would do is buy myself an apartment and move out, then I would buy a car so that I can be free of my parents and their strictness.
I dropped my things beside the door and went to dump my body onto the couch, my stomach growled loudly and I changed directions and ran for the kitchen. The cupboards and fridge were usually empty, today I was lucky enough to find a box of Frosted Flakes sitting on the kitchen table and a box of milk in the fridge. I made myself a big bowl and wolfed it down, then I washed the dishes and wandered into the front room where my friend was sitting, legs curled under her body, on one of the fancy black leather sofas, telephone clamped onto her right ear while she giggled and cooed.
David Lexum came into her life one sunny day in the summer; it was lust at first sight. He was six feet seven inches tall; his dream is to get drafted to the NBA. He had a mass of curly black hair on his head that complimented his strong bronze body and dark deep set eyes, he looked like he walked off the cover of the magazine and he gazed at my friend like she was breakfast. We were at the bar on a beach, and he climbed onto the stool beside her, the two immediately began flirting and I was a bit put out by their antics. From that day on the two were attached at the hips, you hardly went anywhere and saw one without the other. David and I became fast friends, I annoyed him constantly to hear his sexy Brazilian accent, and he in turn would tickle me till I cried or hold me upside down until my face started to change color, but I was always a third wheel. As I watched my gush over her boyfriend’s voice, I knew I would be alone in this apartment tonight, they never told me that they didn’t want me around, but they always left me alone, preferring each other’s company.
I clicked on the TV and flipped through the channels until I found something good to watch, Jerry Springer, I always had a good laugh at the dips that came on that show to make themselves look like complete jackasses. I was pretty sure that they were well paid and their little acts well-rehearsed; because there was no way any human could be that stupid.
I reclined on the leather sofa, it wasn’t long before I started to sweat wherever my skin touched the sofa, Charla continued to giggle, I watched as she made cute faces that David couldn’t see, I smiled at her, glad that she was happy and wishing that I could find happiness myself. My mind went back to Logan; he was perfect so why didn’t I like him that way? Why couldn’t I fall in love with him?