Freak out du jour
I had a dream last night about going to Paris with my roommate and my mother. In it, I actually threw a glass of water at some Sorbonne-type art students when an insult about me being "large and unaware of my space". I would never in a million years do something like that, for fear of reprisal really, but it felt amazingly empowering to just grab up the glass and toss it all over the insulters. I was sure we were going to get kicked out of the art gallery we were in, but the owner had already taken a liking to my mother and the poor, wet students were shown out instead. My interpretation of the dream was that yes, we are going to Paris and I'd just better get ready because awesome things were going to happen!
When I told my mother about the dream, she laughed and said that this is how the legend kept growing about how the men always like her over anyone else, no matter where we go. I know the legend is really based on fact - it's true, men throw themselves at her feet! Me? Not so much. Of course, if could be because I tend to keep on walking... takes the fun out of it, I'll bet.
I had sort of a meltdown yesterday. About what, I'm not entirely sure. All I know is it culminated with quiet emo tears and that yes, there were witnesses. The horror! This isn't normal behavior for me, so I can only think that job stress must be getting to me or something. Nevertheless, I don't really feel any better, I just feel more locked down. This is probably a good thing, since no one needs the awkwardness of dealing with that sort of thing, especially since there's nothing really wrong. Clearly I am cracking up.
In other news, I've been stressing over whether or not to go visit my mother for Christmas. On one hand it feels like wasting money (and somewhere an angel just died when I typed that), but she'll be working nights the entire time and will probably be sleeping most of the days I'm up there. Kind of puts a damper on things. But on the other hand, it's home, I could get my hair cut with my fave stylist, eat lots of Dim Sum at The House of Hong and haunt the Pike Market for stocking stuffers on some of the days that she'll be out of it. That sounds really nice right now. Plus, it seems like a grown up sort of thing to do, move away to someplace great and then visit your relatives over the holidays. It would be a shame not to take advantage of the moment, especially since I never know where I'll be from year to year.
Regardless, I have one whole week off for the Holidays, either Christmas week or New Year's. I'm looking forward to the bonus days since I'm running super low on both sick and vacation days this year. If nothing else, I'll just sit around at home and write or something.
Speaking of, I've decided to take part in the NaNoWriMo this year. I've got a plot bunny that's demanding to be written and I've been reading over my two big stories in the QAF-US fandom, both of which are over 50k long, so it's definitely a possibility that I can pull off another 50k in a month. I'll just have to be super disciplined and abuse caffeine. It's a good excuse to go search out a truckload of Mexican Coco-Cola (sweetened with Sugar, not Corn Syrup) and as many Vitamin Energy drinks as I can cram into the pantry.
Also, I'm thinking some stretching might be in order - my hands are getting tired even typing this much in one go. Clearly I only use my mouse hand regularly. When oh when are they going to complete the direct download from the brain into the computer?
Still psyched for the premiere of Supernatural tonight! We're having pizza in honor of the boys and their usual road food choices and if I'm lucky, some of the extra Mexican Wedding Cookies that my roomie whipped up as a thanks for the welcome our neighbors have given us over the past few weeks. They are super delish and when I grow up, I want to be able to cook like latech !