the one with the wedding wrap up
Things I Learnt About Weddings From Last Saturday
1. you're just going to be late. There is nothing to be done about it.
2. As S proved, if you arrive and then promptly curse infront of the father of the bride, the event can't possibly get worse from that point on.
3. YOU NEED PROVISIONS. That 4 pack of Crispy Cremes donuts was a freaking lifesaver, devoured in the car post-ceremony and pre-reception in record time.
4. If someone says, "don't go near suchandsuch, he's a bit wobbly and is holding a glass of red wine" and you're wearing your goddamn wedding dress, just DON'T GO NEAR SUCHANDSUCH or you'll end up in the loos trying in vain to get red wine out of your wedding dress.
5. Don't leave the mic on after the speeches so that drunk hooligans accidentally figure out that it's still on and try a bit of stand up comedy.
And, a Very Special List of "WTF" Bits From Last Saturday:
1. Friend who ignores you for over A YEAR ends up being superawesome friend
2. Friend who is nice is actually quite rude.
3. People who are pharamacists are incredibly self-absorbed.
4. Being one of two non-drunk people in a conga line.
5. When you are sober, and realise that you're more likely to stack it whilst doing afermentioned conga dancing in your low wedge shoes than the bride who is by this stage incredibly tanked and shoe-less.
6. Realising that the fact that 8 years after high school, you can still sit in a car with four of your friends eating donuts, listening to tacky music and fixing makeup and it will STILL BE AWESOME.
In other news, when we were driving down the goddamn mountain at midnight, S and I spotted: two owls, a brush-tailed possum, a paddymelon (I nearly died of cute), several native mice and an incredibly pregnant cow.
1. you're just going to be late. There is nothing to be done about it.
2. As S proved, if you arrive and then promptly curse infront of the father of the bride, the event can't possibly get worse from that point on.
3. YOU NEED PROVISIONS. That 4 pack of Crispy Cremes donuts was a freaking lifesaver, devoured in the car post-ceremony and pre-reception in record time.
4. If someone says, "don't go near suchandsuch, he's a bit wobbly and is holding a glass of red wine" and you're wearing your goddamn wedding dress, just DON'T GO NEAR SUCHANDSUCH or you'll end up in the loos trying in vain to get red wine out of your wedding dress.
5. Don't leave the mic on after the speeches so that drunk hooligans accidentally figure out that it's still on and try a bit of stand up comedy.
And, a Very Special List of "WTF" Bits From Last Saturday:
1. Friend who ignores you for over A YEAR ends up being superawesome friend
2. Friend who is nice is actually quite rude.
3. People who are pharamacists are incredibly self-absorbed.
4. Being one of two non-drunk people in a conga line.
5. When you are sober, and realise that you're more likely to stack it whilst doing afermentioned conga dancing in your low wedge shoes than the bride who is by this stage incredibly tanked and shoe-less.
6. Realising that the fact that 8 years after high school, you can still sit in a car with four of your friends eating donuts, listening to tacky music and fixing makeup and it will STILL BE AWESOME.
In other news, when we were driving down the goddamn mountain at midnight, S and I spotted: two owls, a brush-tailed possum, a paddymelon (I nearly died of cute), several native mice and an incredibly pregnant cow.