I'm trying to find a funny site I found once, and have stumbled across
http://homepage.mac.com/mrlaurie/btcfolder/astro2002webpages/Period%202/Io.html which is a man's description of Io. Points 3-5 is the best, it is a poorly punctuated but sensibly reasoned (if slightly unscientific) description of why people shouldn't land on Io. In an ejaculation of legitimacy unjustified by the unimportance of his Io page, he then lists his sources.
I also found this
Click to view
which is all the more preposterous because it's in italian(i think?) for some reason. usually, if something is not in english, you can tell before clicking on it. Not that i'm bothered, it was just unexpected.