Ehhh....
well this entry is gonna be alittle different... im not really gonna summerize the days I've missed... cuz honestly nothing too exciting has happened... i mean its not like my life is dry and dull cuz thats the least of what my life is....but like nothing really happened that could like make me smile... like i used to smile....but its not like im happy... cuz i am happy... im just empty... and as usual EMO!
The past couple days have been sure torture to my heart.... and its not like what it was, was bad... cuz thats the last thing I would call it....but its just twisting my heart into feeling things... that im scared to feel... but i want to feel these things.... im not gonna let my head get in the way of my heart....but at times i seriously question what the fuck I can possibly be thinking... its like im nuts or something... cuz any normal person would never feel the way i feel after everything that has happened... but no I have to be difficult...and its like I pray every night for something "understandable" to happen to me... but things just end up getting MORE confusing....all i can ask is "why"