Alive.. I Guess....
Today was normal... I have been completly out of it latley... Its like everything that used to matter doesn't and Im not feeling the same anymore.. I feel worthless... useless... lonely... and alone... Im not sure I can Take it anymore
I gave Kendra her green Converse back today... she seemed happy to see me.... the only thing that made me somewhat happy is that me and her had the same lunch... for once... sadly its the only lunch i think we have together.... :(
Okay this is really starting to annoy the shit out of me... its like 2 people in my social group came out like 4 months ago and said they were Bi and now EVERYONE and there mothers is bi now.... its like they wanna fit in or wait... they wanna fit out... they wanna be different... I mean like I have no problem with gay people... male or female... but come on... half of them prolly aren't even really bi... i dont get it... its like with out those 2 brave people those punk ass people prolly wouldn't even have the guts to say something... those people built a bridge for them... and like its starting to sould like the new "punk". one person says something... something that outcasts them, then everyone wants to feel outcasted when in reality there just creating a new social group with that outcasting label... idk maybe I make no sence but like if u understood where I was coming from maybe you would get how effin annoying it is... be yourself... be who you are... and hey maybe Im wrong maybe in reality they are really all gay... hey I really dont know...
I hate this... im soo depressed... I cant function right its like Im dreaming... dreaming of taking away my pain... by cutting... but I know I could never do that being the pussay I am... I need a way to excape... to excape from how Im feeling... its not worth it anymore... nothings worth it
I cant take it... I need to leave I need to get out... I need to feel better...
Whats the point anymore... whats the big deal... would you notice if I wasn't here? I need some light... something needs to go right for me...
dont turn away
dont give in to the pain
dont try to hide
though thy're screaming your name
dont close your eyes
god knows what lies behind them
dont turn out the light
never sleep never die
I gave Kendra her green Converse back today... she seemed happy to see me.... the only thing that made me somewhat happy is that me and her had the same lunch... for once... sadly its the only lunch i think we have together.... :(
Okay this is really starting to annoy the shit out of me... its like 2 people in my social group came out like 4 months ago and said they were Bi and now EVERYONE and there mothers is bi now.... its like they wanna fit in or wait... they wanna fit out... they wanna be different... I mean like I have no problem with gay people... male or female... but come on... half of them prolly aren't even really bi... i dont get it... its like with out those 2 brave people those punk ass people prolly wouldn't even have the guts to say something... those people built a bridge for them... and like its starting to sould like the new "punk". one person says something... something that outcasts them, then everyone wants to feel outcasted when in reality there just creating a new social group with that outcasting label... idk maybe I make no sence but like if u understood where I was coming from maybe you would get how effin annoying it is... be yourself... be who you are... and hey maybe Im wrong maybe in reality they are really all gay... hey I really dont know...
I hate this... im soo depressed... I cant function right its like Im dreaming... dreaming of taking away my pain... by cutting... but I know I could never do that being the pussay I am... I need a way to excape... to excape from how Im feeling... its not worth it anymore... nothings worth it
I cant take it... I need to leave I need to get out... I need to feel better...
Whats the point anymore... whats the big deal... would you notice if I wasn't here? I need some light... something needs to go right for me...
dont turn away
dont give in to the pain
dont try to hide
though thy're screaming your name
dont close your eyes
god knows what lies behind them
dont turn out the light
never sleep never die