land of the leafs
last day. it's bittersweet i would say as it always is but this time i have something that i absolutely could not live without waiting for me at home. this was an interesting thanksgiving. this may sound self-obsessed but i'm going to say it anyway. my usual thanksgiving visits consists of me coming home to be the center of attention as i am the only one who travels from the land of far far away...this year though, things took a different turn. my darling brother whom i adore and love to pieces decided to spend a holiday with his family, which no one is ever prepared for. the attention as per usual when brian decides to show up, has now been shifted. not only does the family barely speak full sentences to me, i don't believe i was actually here for half the trip. but it's fine, i've worked nineteen years to get used to the fact that my older sibling will always be favoured...i will never understand it, and i'm not sure if it happens with anyone else, but c'est la vie. i enjoyed my time with my faj though. i miss him every day and it's so hard to only see him for a few days at a time. i try thinking about it like i'm just another kid that's gone away for a while and visits on holidays, but most kids do that after they graduate from highschool, not grade eight. it's been a long time coming. this has also been a different holiday in terms of our family starting to lose one that we hold very close to our hearts. i've been through the process before but never with someone of blood. that's a part of my lifelong dying...he's the only one i look like too. now people will really believe i'm adopted. i'm praying again. which is odd because sometimes i decide that i'm giving up on the big guy upstairs because sometimes it feels like nothing is going to go my way...this is much heavier, and so i'm finally praying not for things to change or get done, but just to keep people's spirits high because at this point, with his condition its' all anyone can hope for. hopefully my prayers were answered. i had a good time with the old friends. they all came out on thursday night just like i knew they would. they're true blood those guys. i remember playing in the sandbox with those bitches. and now we're pounding forties together. so strange to think that i can't even tie my hair in pigtails anymore and yet those peeps still have my back. but i'm coming home, to the land of the canucks and i'm happy that my life can go back to a bit of normalcy before i have to make another trek back out here in a month. hopefully the time away from 'the boy' has strengthened our stance. it's gonna be really nice to see him and everyone else. don't forget, to everyone who might be able to pull it off my birthday is the 20th and you should all get your bums into town so you can watch me flash my passport to the bouncer at every club that i've ever been denied at...which, when i think about it, is none, but any club that i've ever used a fake at so you can laugh at the dumb bouncer with me. it'll be a rockin' good show and a much welcomed celebration. hope to see some of you there (especially C, J, S, and K) despite never seeing you, you know how much i value you. and you're one hell of a group of parties no doubt. i'll stop the rambling now. its early and i've got a flight to catch. peace out homeslices. back to reality.
-KDR
-KDR