Fuck
Someone asked me today if I needed anything. What a silly question, I thought to myself. I need a lot of things. None of which I know how to get and most of which I can't even really identify verbally. I'm just lonely. Bone aching,head throbbing, tears streaming lonely. Why. I don't fucking know. Maybe because it took two years to get over him. Maybe because since then I just set myself up for failure. Maybe because my legs aren't long enough my waist isn't small enough and my boobs aren't big enough. Alright, so its not the boobs. I find myself attracted to people that I don't really want. I don't have a future with and can't give me any emotional support. At all. I've become everybodies bestfriend but no ones wet dream. The ones I really could have had something with I dismissed. What is wrong with me. I feel isolated. My bestfriend is off living a life somewhere and I feel like I'm just going through the motions. Do you know how long its been since anyone but her has even recognized that there may be something wrong with me instead of just dumping all their shit into my lap. I just want to scream but I think that I'm to depressed even for that. Fuck.