moneyyyyyyyyyy
So I had a number of talks about finances today. :) I have come to some important conclusions about myself. Now that I am sure I have piqued your interest (HA!), I shall tell you what they are.
1. I Procrastinate. When it comes to finances, I am a huge procrastinator and forgetter. I will not pay bills until the last day they are due. I will not make hair, doctor, or dental appointments because I will have to pay for them, even if it's minimal. If I owe someone money, I will not give it to them unless they remind me.
2. I am faithless. I do not tithe because I have an extreme lack of faith that God will bless me, and a fear of lack of results. I paradoxically trust God's promises of salvation, but not His promises that He will provide for me financially when I need it, and that He will bless what I give Him (because it is, in fact, His anyway).
3. I make excuses. I've used the excuses that the church doesn't really need my money, that I don't really know who to give to, that I don't support what the money I give would be going toward (as if I could only ever give money to one thing), that God may not provide for me financially in return but will just give me spiritual blessings and that's not good enough.
4. I deceive myself. I've convinced myself that it's ok to not tithe, it's ok not to trust God with my money and invest financially in ministries at church or otherwise, and that I'll end up doing it "someday." In the past (that is, most of my life up until today) I have used the excuse that I am strapped for cash as a reason for not tithing or giving financially. In reality, I have residual money after I get paid and pay bills that I spend on entertainment, and when that money is gone, I then say I am strapped for cash.
The Truth:
I have gone the whole money-handling part of my life without trusting God. The scriptures say over and over that we are mandated to give to the kingdom of God with our money (Jesus spoke more about money than He did about heaven, hell, the kingdom of God, and prayer) and that in turn, God will bless us.
Finances is the only area in scripture where God actually tells us to test Him.
"Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this, says the Lord God almighty, and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that you will not have room enough for it." (Malachi 3:10)
It's gonna be rough. But I realize that I am building the foundations of a Christian home right now, even before I get married. I am not going to all of a sudden sprout good habits just because I am a wife...I need to get into these habits now, because I will be the same person after the name change as I am now.
The Goal: start tithing 10 % of every paycheck (weekly) for now until I get into the habit.