Dear movie critics of the world,
Alright. We get it. You don't like to see people cut up and tortured in grotesque, indulgent ways. Senseless acts of bodily harm cushioned by often times weak plot and character development just doesn't get your juices flowing.
But to some people, it's a sickly orgasmic pleasure. Some would call them deranged. Others call them nerds. Whatever, lets not get hung up on facts.
The point is, I would really like you, movie critics of the world, to stop judging genre pictures, specifically those of the horror genre, based on your own opinions of the genre itself. You went to movie critic school (they do exist), you learned the ropes, and you were told to review a movie based on what it attempts to accomplish, not what the movie is, specifically.
Horror movies attempt to gross people out and fuck people up. And I understand, movie critics of the world, you guys are all pussies. That's okay, I'm not trying to slander anyone here. But if you're going to sit there at your little corner table at Starbucks with your iBook and your mocha latte and tell me that I shouldn't go to see the most recent horror movie because it depicts senseless acts of mutilation and torture for no apparent reason, you need to either a. call your metal-head teenage son and ask his opinion on the movie first, and then write your review, or b. shoot yourself in the head. Yeah. Right there in Starbucks. It'd make a great character piece.
But to some people, it's a sickly orgasmic pleasure. Some would call them deranged. Others call them nerds. Whatever, lets not get hung up on facts.
The point is, I would really like you, movie critics of the world, to stop judging genre pictures, specifically those of the horror genre, based on your own opinions of the genre itself. You went to movie critic school (they do exist), you learned the ropes, and you were told to review a movie based on what it attempts to accomplish, not what the movie is, specifically.
Horror movies attempt to gross people out and fuck people up. And I understand, movie critics of the world, you guys are all pussies. That's okay, I'm not trying to slander anyone here. But if you're going to sit there at your little corner table at Starbucks with your iBook and your mocha latte and tell me that I shouldn't go to see the most recent horror movie because it depicts senseless acts of mutilation and torture for no apparent reason, you need to either a. call your metal-head teenage son and ask his opinion on the movie first, and then write your review, or b. shoot yourself in the head. Yeah. Right there in Starbucks. It'd make a great character piece.