Running On Empty.
Woke up early this morning for the Adidas King of The Road. I was hoping that a 10k fun run would clear my head of the self depreciating thoughts that have been plaguing me for the past month. Yes, the battle with my inner critic continues.
I got there early and had enough time to do some stretching and to check out who are running this year. Some of them were familiar faces, fun run regulars if you may. Saw some guys from the gym, but i don't personally know them so i didn't bother with the pleasantries.
The shot signified the start of the race, and as i started to jog i thought to myself - -"I missed this." It was just me, my iPOD, and the road. It's simple. It's real. It's definite. It's a preview of what my life is gonna be. I guess it's ok. I'd be alone, but at least i have my iPOD. So i started picking up my pace, hoping to break my record time last year. 5K into the race, my knee started to hurt. That's what i get for missing out on those practice runs with AMCI. Yet, despite the pain, i told myself that i will not stop. No, i will not quit. I will not even walk to the finish line. I will finish this, running. And painful as it was, i did it. Yes, i failed to beat my record time last year. That was 55:20, today's run took me 1:01:55 to finish it. Limping, i crossed the finish line, i was a bit disappointed but i gave myself a pat on the back for finishing the race - -running.
As i joined my AMCI pals, Mike a B2K6 trainee asked where we could get water. Feeling thirsty myself i went with him to the water station. On our way there, i ran into Paolo Broma. He's an account executive from TBWA. Suffice to say, i have a crush on the guy. Mainly because he looks like RT. But that's not the point. We've been introduced before by some common friends, in the hopes that we could get together sometime. Alas, i 'm not his type. Why am i surprised? Mr. I-fall-for-guys-who-are-unavailable - -literally and emotionally.
I saw him first, and then i quickly looked away.It's as if i ran into an ex-boyfriend. I stole another glance and saw him about to look at my direction. But being the chicken shit that i am, i turned my back and looked away. What for, right? He didn't like me. I don't need another reminder. So, a took a sip of my water, and ran back to my AMCI pals. My knees hurt alright, but my ego felt worst.
On the way home, i thought "Why do you even hope JC?" Maybe it's because i will always be a hopeless romantic. And although i am tired of looking and waiting, i just can't let go of my dream that one day i will find him. Singlehood is the price i have to pay for being idealistic. And although i am running on empty, even if my heart gets ripped apart everytime my bubble gets burst, i just have to tell myself that i will not stop.I will bear the pain. Because hopeless or not, I will finish this - -running.
I got there early and had enough time to do some stretching and to check out who are running this year. Some of them were familiar faces, fun run regulars if you may. Saw some guys from the gym, but i don't personally know them so i didn't bother with the pleasantries.
The shot signified the start of the race, and as i started to jog i thought to myself - -"I missed this." It was just me, my iPOD, and the road. It's simple. It's real. It's definite. It's a preview of what my life is gonna be. I guess it's ok. I'd be alone, but at least i have my iPOD. So i started picking up my pace, hoping to break my record time last year. 5K into the race, my knee started to hurt. That's what i get for missing out on those practice runs with AMCI. Yet, despite the pain, i told myself that i will not stop. No, i will not quit. I will not even walk to the finish line. I will finish this, running. And painful as it was, i did it. Yes, i failed to beat my record time last year. That was 55:20, today's run took me 1:01:55 to finish it. Limping, i crossed the finish line, i was a bit disappointed but i gave myself a pat on the back for finishing the race - -running.
As i joined my AMCI pals, Mike a B2K6 trainee asked where we could get water. Feeling thirsty myself i went with him to the water station. On our way there, i ran into Paolo Broma. He's an account executive from TBWA. Suffice to say, i have a crush on the guy. Mainly because he looks like RT. But that's not the point. We've been introduced before by some common friends, in the hopes that we could get together sometime. Alas, i 'm not his type. Why am i surprised? Mr. I-fall-for-guys-who-are-unavailable - -literally and emotionally.
I saw him first, and then i quickly looked away.It's as if i ran into an ex-boyfriend. I stole another glance and saw him about to look at my direction. But being the chicken shit that i am, i turned my back and looked away. What for, right? He didn't like me. I don't need another reminder. So, a took a sip of my water, and ran back to my AMCI pals. My knees hurt alright, but my ego felt worst.
On the way home, i thought "Why do you even hope JC?" Maybe it's because i will always be a hopeless romantic. And although i am tired of looking and waiting, i just can't let go of my dream that one day i will find him. Singlehood is the price i have to pay for being idealistic. And although i am running on empty, even if my heart gets ripped apart everytime my bubble gets burst, i just have to tell myself that i will not stop.I will bear the pain. Because hopeless or not, I will finish this - -running.