there's two of us, both can't be right
In three weeks I will be moving far away from my family, and even farther away from my real-life friends, and this would be an appropriate time to point out that I am *horrible* at keeping in touch with people. I almost never initiate emails or letters or phone calls, and am very unreliable in responding to the first two - not cause I don't want to, just because I always feel like I need to wait until I have lots to say, which almost never happens. And I'm not so worried about the fam, but I'd really like to start talking to my college friends more often and keeping them up-to-date with whatever's going on with me.
All of the above has me seriously considering getting a second LJ.
I still haven't worked out all the details in my head yet; would I keep personal stuff over there and fannish stuff here, or crosspost personal stuff to both LJs? And would I be okay with fannish people friending my personal LJ, or might that lead to RL people discovering this journal? I'm not sure yet if I'm okay with trying to divide my life - and my ramblings about my life - along these lines, cause stuff blurs together sometimes. But I do think I need some sort of space where I can share news and various things with RL folk; it would make me get off my ass and talk to them more than a couple times a year.
I am just ... not quite ready for my friends and family (hereafter referred to as F&F, cause it's easier to type! *g*) to know certain things about me that I have no problem sharing with a fannish community. Or, it's not even that I don't want them to know stuff; I'm just not prepared to deal with the consequences of them knowing. For example, I don't imagine that revealing my newfound atheism to a group of people who (a) are all hardcore Christians and (b) have only ever known the hardcore-Christian part of me, would go over too well. Or telling them that I happen to think girls are really hot, and I don't quite know what that means yet or even if it means anything, which it may not, it may in fact just mean that I'm not completely blind, but well, there it is. Or announcing that I may not self-identify as a slasher, but all my best fannish friends are slashers [insert obligatory snicker here], and yes I do occasionally read gay porn - gasp! - and sometimes I even like it - double gasp! All of which they would discover if they read this LJ. Hence, the possible need for a tame, non-fannish blog.
Even if I were able to overcome my skittishness about letting the F&F in on that stuff, knowing thereafter that they were reading my fannish journal would be a strong temptation to censor myself. I'd think twice before saying things like "So I read this fic the other day where Fraser gives Ray a blowjob in the Riv and it was really hot" if I know my mom is gonna read it. Even if that's what I really feel like saying at the moment.
(The exception to all of the above is katearbor, who is a part of both worlds - the only person in my life who is, actually - and who has been an absolute PEACH about all the big revelations and shit I've thrown at her, and whom I could not imagine living without.)
Of course, the practical part of me pipes up about now with a roll of her eyes and "You know this two-LJs thing is gonna make you feel like even more of a split personality than you already do; you're trying to hide so many different parts of yourself from so many different people as it is. Just give your F&F the link to THIS LJ and deal with the fallout already." To which I reply, "Easier said than done, Ms. Practical. Now shut up so I can fret and ponder and worry some more."
And there is always the option of keeping just this LJ, flocking the whole thing and using filters, which is probably the easiest and smartest thing to do. But I can't quite get over my slight distaste for requiring people to friend me in order to read my posts; it feels unfair to lurkers, somehow. Not that I think there are dozens of lurkers out there hanging around my blog. But whatever. And whether or not I end up locking the personal posts, it's a problem either way; on the one hand I'd have to tell the F&F "please don't call me by my real name or give out any details about me when commenting, kthx!" which would be weird, and on the other hand they'd all have to get LJs of their own just to see what I write, which they almost certainly wouldn't bother to do.
Eh. Now I've rambled so much that I've lost my own train of thought.
I'd really like to hear from anyone else out there who has more than one LJ/blog/whathaveyou. What are the purposes of your various journals, is there any overlap in post content and/or friending, is it ever confusing, etc. Would you recommend it as a workable solution for staying in touch with RL friends while keeping your fannish persona a secret?
All of the above has me seriously considering getting a second LJ.
I still haven't worked out all the details in my head yet; would I keep personal stuff over there and fannish stuff here, or crosspost personal stuff to both LJs? And would I be okay with fannish people friending my personal LJ, or might that lead to RL people discovering this journal? I'm not sure yet if I'm okay with trying to divide my life - and my ramblings about my life - along these lines, cause stuff blurs together sometimes. But I do think I need some sort of space where I can share news and various things with RL folk; it would make me get off my ass and talk to them more than a couple times a year.
I am just ... not quite ready for my friends and family (hereafter referred to as F&F, cause it's easier to type! *g*) to know certain things about me that I have no problem sharing with a fannish community. Or, it's not even that I don't want them to know stuff; I'm just not prepared to deal with the consequences of them knowing. For example, I don't imagine that revealing my newfound atheism to a group of people who (a) are all hardcore Christians and (b) have only ever known the hardcore-Christian part of me, would go over too well. Or telling them that I happen to think girls are really hot, and I don't quite know what that means yet or even if it means anything, which it may not, it may in fact just mean that I'm not completely blind, but well, there it is. Or announcing that I may not self-identify as a slasher, but all my best fannish friends are slashers [insert obligatory snicker here], and yes I do occasionally read gay porn - gasp! - and sometimes I even like it - double gasp! All of which they would discover if they read this LJ. Hence, the possible need for a tame, non-fannish blog.
Even if I were able to overcome my skittishness about letting the F&F in on that stuff, knowing thereafter that they were reading my fannish journal would be a strong temptation to censor myself. I'd think twice before saying things like "So I read this fic the other day where Fraser gives Ray a blowjob in the Riv and it was really hot" if I know my mom is gonna read it. Even if that's what I really feel like saying at the moment.
(The exception to all of the above is katearbor, who is a part of both worlds - the only person in my life who is, actually - and who has been an absolute PEACH about all the big revelations and shit I've thrown at her, and whom I could not imagine living without.)
Of course, the practical part of me pipes up about now with a roll of her eyes and "You know this two-LJs thing is gonna make you feel like even more of a split personality than you already do; you're trying to hide so many different parts of yourself from so many different people as it is. Just give your F&F the link to THIS LJ and deal with the fallout already." To which I reply, "Easier said than done, Ms. Practical. Now shut up so I can fret and ponder and worry some more."
And there is always the option of keeping just this LJ, flocking the whole thing and using filters, which is probably the easiest and smartest thing to do. But I can't quite get over my slight distaste for requiring people to friend me in order to read my posts; it feels unfair to lurkers, somehow. Not that I think there are dozens of lurkers out there hanging around my blog. But whatever. And whether or not I end up locking the personal posts, it's a problem either way; on the one hand I'd have to tell the F&F "please don't call me by my real name or give out any details about me when commenting, kthx!" which would be weird, and on the other hand they'd all have to get LJs of their own just to see what I write, which they almost certainly wouldn't bother to do.
Eh. Now I've rambled so much that I've lost my own train of thought.
I'd really like to hear from anyone else out there who has more than one LJ/blog/whathaveyou. What are the purposes of your various journals, is there any overlap in post content and/or friending, is it ever confusing, etc. Would you recommend it as a workable solution for staying in touch with RL friends while keeping your fannish persona a secret?