GAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!
While browsing the internet to do a little casual research for my non-fiction essay, I typed “virginity” into my Google toolbar, hoping to find some relevant articles to the importance of female virginity in some cultures around the world. All-knowing Google popped up a list of popular searches, which I browsed until one literally made my mouth fall open in shock.
“Virginity soap.”
Surely, I thought to myself, this must be a joke. Like the “wash away your sins” brand of soap that, tongue firmly in cheek, displays a grinning Jesus on its wrappings and boasts that it will cleanse you of all of your sins. So, curious one that I am, I scroll past the search results commenting on virginity soap, looking to find the real deal before reading anyone else’s judgments on it, and follow the search to www.virginitysoap.com.
"Like a virgin.
That's how VICTORIA Virginity Soap will make you feel once used on your most private parts. As an all-natural, mild and gentle feminine soap, VICTORIA Virginity Soap cleans your sensitive regions from bacteria and unpleasant odors while temporarily stretches the surrounding skin giving it a "tightening effect".
Used and enjoyed by hundreds of thousands of women in the Middle East and Asia, it has brought back youthful passions, rekindled sensual yearnings, and completely intensified sexual experience.
VICTORIA Virginity Soap. Discover your deepest sexual pleasures once again - - - just like a virgin."
Oh, but you’ll be comforted to know that the soap is all-natural and hypoallergenic, and a steal at only $5.99 per bar. And, “its powerful and natural ingredients effectively gets rid of odour and disease-causing microbes, fungi and bacteria,” because, you know, the vagina doesn’t do that by itself already.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *is ded of rage*
“Virginity soap.”
Surely, I thought to myself, this must be a joke. Like the “wash away your sins” brand of soap that, tongue firmly in cheek, displays a grinning Jesus on its wrappings and boasts that it will cleanse you of all of your sins. So, curious one that I am, I scroll past the search results commenting on virginity soap, looking to find the real deal before reading anyone else’s judgments on it, and follow the search to www.virginitysoap.com.
"Like a virgin.
That's how VICTORIA Virginity Soap will make you feel once used on your most private parts. As an all-natural, mild and gentle feminine soap, VICTORIA Virginity Soap cleans your sensitive regions from bacteria and unpleasant odors while temporarily stretches the surrounding skin giving it a "tightening effect".
Used and enjoyed by hundreds of thousands of women in the Middle East and Asia, it has brought back youthful passions, rekindled sensual yearnings, and completely intensified sexual experience.
VICTORIA Virginity Soap. Discover your deepest sexual pleasures once again - - - just like a virgin."
Oh, but you’ll be comforted to know that the soap is all-natural and hypoallergenic, and a steal at only $5.99 per bar. And, “its powerful and natural ingredients effectively gets rid of odour and disease-causing microbes, fungi and bacteria,” because, you know, the vagina doesn’t do that by itself already.
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *is ded of rage*