Countdown to Final Christmas: 24
Howdy all! I've volunteered Wednesdays for the Christmas Countdown, so even though the master schedule isn't done yet, I figured it was best to get things started with our first entry.
Title: Secret Santa
Rating: PGish
Summary: The Rogues struggle with Christmas presents and 'feelings'
Characters: Trickster, Weather Wizard, Captain Cold, Heatwave, Captain Boomerang, Golden Glider, Piper, Rainbow Raider
"Anyone else getting the feeling that maybe we've gone a little soft since the kid took over as the scarlet dipshit?" Digger asked, frowning at the little slip of paper in his hand.
"What, just because half of us are supposedly reformed, we let him and his girlfriend hang out at our last party, and it's been awhile since anyone actually robbed anything?" Mark asked cheekily.
Digger shrugged. "All that doesn't bug me half as much as this." He motioned to the paper. "Having Secret Santas is just pushing it too much. Getting shitfaced and playing cards is one thing, but this? This is kinda fruity. And we don't even have a fruit in the Rogues anymore."
Mick let out a wistful sigh. "Piper always gave the best Christmas presents. Y'think he'll still do it even though he's working with the capes now?"
"Doubt it. And Digger, there's nothing inherently gay about buying your friends Christmas presents," Mark said.
"Friends maybe, but what about accomplices? I'm just saying, the fruit was the only one of us who ever did it and I think he was buttering us up-"
"Piper wasn't hitting on you Digger," Mick said with an eyeroll.
"Ever," Mark added. "If he was hitting on anyone, it was me or Trickster. We're the hot ones."
He glanced down at his scrap of paper. "Oh balls, I can't shop for him! You're right Digger, this Secret Santa thing is stupid."
"So are you volunteering to say that to Lisa?" Mick asked, grinning. Based on the squirms, the answer from both men was no.
Lisa bounced happily into the room, adorned with tinsel and glitter, looking very much to be in high Christmas spirits. "Hi boys. You all pulled your Secret Santas, right?"
They nodded obediently, not having much choice beyond polite assent. Len was standing behind his sister looking distinctly like an enforcer for her whims. James walked in behind them munching on a sugar cookie.
"I've still gotta draw," James said, approaching the little bowl with the three remaining scraps of paper. His face fell when he read his. "Balls! How'm I supposed to shop for him?"
Mark and Digger started giggling, but Mick whacked them when he noticed a dangerous looking pout from Lisa.
"You'll think of something." She grabbed the next-to-last paper, frowned when she looked at it, but managed to hold back an exclamation of balls. And of course it was impossible to tell what Len thought when he read his.
"Alright guys, you've got your assignments. Don't screw it up," Len snarled.
CHRISTMAS EVE
James waved to Mark and jogged to catch up to him as they made their way towards the hideout, both with brightly colored packages under an arm. "Hey, how went the shopping?" James asked.
"Managed. Let's get this over with."
They walked into the hideout and blinked a few times when they saw the interior. The walls were covered with green and yellow garlands and lights, there were ornamental tops and ice-skates hanging from doorways like mistletoe, and there was a large tree where the TV usually sat. Instead of a star or an angel at the top of the tree, there was a bloodied Flash doll with X's for eyes impaled through the top branch (sporting the old solid lightning belt).
"Well that's..."
"Disturbing," Mark snapped.
"It's almost festive," James said with a frown. He put his present under the tree, and Mark did likewise.
The other Rogues slowly trickled in. Roy took a picture of the tree and complimented the red and white decorations (no one bothered correcting him anymore), while Len set up a punch bowl of rum with a drizzle of eggnog over the top.
"So, presents?" James asked.
"Sure. Wait, Lenny, put on Christmas music!" Lisa said. The Rogues collectively groaned, but Lisa insisted, so her brother reluctantly put on the radio and looked for Christmas music that wasn't grating.
"If Dominic the Donkey comes on, I'm zapping the radio," Mark threatened.
Lisa frowned. "Roscoe and I always listened to Christmas music when we exchanged prese-"
"Alright, presents!" Len yelled, cutting that off before it descended into further crazy. He grabbed a present at random and hucked it to its owner. "There you go Digger, Merry Christmas!"
Digger opened the present and held up a tie. "Really? Fucking fruity ass gift-swap."
"Sorry Digger. I was re-gifting. Kinda forgot about this thing until the last minute," Mick admitted. Len tossed Mick's gift at him and hit the side of his head. "Ow!" He opened it up, revealing a pack of lighters. "Did you buy these at the gas station on the way over?!"
James laughed, while Lisa sighed. "We should have set a price range."
"Are you saying you don't like the lighters?" Mark snapped. "It's fine. Totally works. Hell, they're even a little thoughtful."
"Uh huh. Here's your present Mardon." Len tossed him a gift.
"Oooh. A six pack of a brand of beer I don't like." Mark passed the present right back to the person who'd blatantly got it for him, and Digger cracked one open and toasted him.
"Merry Christmas!"
"Digger, you didn't even try!" Lisa yelled.
"Yeah, but I got something I liked out of the deal. It's better than a fucking tie anyway."
"Hey, that was a nice tie! It just didn't work with my skin tone, okay?!"
James slipped from the hideout as the Rogues erupted into squabbles.
MEANWHILE
Piper left the soup kitchen reeking of cheap gravy, but overall in good holiday spirits. There was a light fluffy snow falling during his walk home, and he had a visit with his parents and sister to look forward to for the next day. He started humming Christmas songs under his breath as he walked.
Then he noticed his house had been broken into.
Sighing, Piper stood on the sidewalk outside for a minute and listened. The only way he'd been able to tell, actually, was because the living room light was on and there was smoke coming from the chimney he rarely used. A quick listen brought the distinctive hum of flying shoes and a lovely voice singing O Holy Night along with the radio to his ears.
Sounded like James was moving towards the kitchen. Smiling again, Piper let himself in and went to confront his uninvited guest.
"Hello James. Done with the Rogues Secret Santa already?"
"It was just as bad an idea as we thought it was. I figured I was better off spending the holiday with you, if that's okay."
"Are you making cookies?"
"Oatmeal raisin, peanut butter, and sugar."
Piper smiled. "Between you and the chef I started seeing, I'm going to gain so much weight."
"Oh c'mon, everyone pigs out on the holidays. You've got a new guy?"
"Maybe. We've had a few good dates. He's overseas for Christmas though, so I am free and you're more than welcome to stay."
"Well of course I am. I've got cookies."
Christmas morning found Piper and James asleep in the living room, with plates of cookies, crumbs and mugs of cocoa scattered around them. James woke first, and was still staring at the Christmas tree in stunned disbelief when Piper groggily opened his eyes.
"Morning James. Merry Christmas," Piper said around a yawn. "Is everything okay?"
"S-Santa came! Those weren't here last night!" James yelled, pointing at a pile of presents. Huh. Poorly wrapped presents. In the Rogues' colors.
"Oh, yeah. You know how I used to do presents for you guys before I reformed?" Piper asked. James nodded. "It took a few years, but the guys started getting me presents too. I'm still not sure how they get them in here without me hearing them, but this is the third year running."
Piper sat down and opened his presents. He got a handsome antique metronome from Mark, a book of Christmas carols with Normal Rockwell prints from Len, tickets to a music festival from Mick, and a treble clef made of chocolate from Digger.
James couldn't help but gape at the presents. "You should have seen the shit they were getting for each other. And I do mean shit. Digger got Mark beer for himself!"
Piper shrugged. "I always get them presents they like. Every now and then they show a little appreciation for it. Not enough to give me illusions that I ever fit in, or that I've made a mistake switching sides. But they're nice friendly gestures."
"Did Kid Flash get you a present too?" James asked.
"The Flash, and yes. He got me a gift certificate to Radio Shack."
James snorted. "A gift certificate? What, did he forget you were rich?"
Piper shrugged. "Gift certificates are still nice. Besides, unless we're counting cookies and company, you didn't get me anything."
"I did, but ah, it's not ready yet. So what'd your boyfriend get you?"
Piper frowned thoughtfully. "I don't know if I can call Michael my boyfriend yet-"
"But it's heading there?" James asked. Piper nodded with a telling stupid smile on his face. "Swell."
"Anyway, he made me fudge and when he gets back from visiting his parents we're going out to dinner."
"Well that's nice."
James had to break into a department store and find a new gift and a new Christmas card for Piper while he was out with his family. He finally settled on a stack of books on music and sound that he was pretty sure he'd never seen lying around his nerdy friend's house.
Obviously he needed something friendlier than what he'd originally planned.
The card with the carefully worded declaration of love (that he'd spent over a month writing, dammit!) went under James' mattress to wait for next year. He was pretty sure he could get rid of this 'Michael' by then.