This is sucha pity

[pinupvixenmori]

Went to dinner with my mom Carline. Bascially I asked her why she was badmouthing me and my boyfriend and my life to my Ex brother Mike. She said she didnt have an answer. Then we both said hurtful things and at the end of our conversation we settled on staying out of each other's lives. She told me, once Im 18 -no help from her. Shes moving out of state and could care less if we ever talk again. Shes made damn sure of telling me not to expect any christmas or birthday presents. That was sweet. She also told me what a scum bag Noal is. Considering she's only seen him once, never even talked to him that was wonderful. What does she have to show for anything? She had a kid at 18. Struggled her whole life. Married my dad who was 22 yrs older than her, and he didnt even wana marry the stupid whore! I was supposed to be an abortion. She reminds me of that all the time. Growing up with a 70 yr old dad and a 50 yr old whore has been quite an upbringing. And I loved my dad more than anyone, I miss him as well. But hes the only one who ever rele cared for me. Hes gone. And this stupid whore all she does is judge everyone and look down on everyone?! Whats she have to show for it?! Her job?! her failed marriage?! Her fucked up kids?! Hope she swallows a bottle of morphine and peaces the fuck out! When Im 18 that is. Whats it matter? She's not gona support me nemore. Not that she really is anyway.

Life sucks.
I'm -1000 in my bank account.
Im failing school.
I dont have a job and bills to pay.
I have bad references cause my bipolar ass couldnt hold a job.
My friends are pretty phony except for a good handful that mean more to me than the world.
My puppy is a stupid asshole who chews up everything and her dumb ass is staying w\my cunt of a mother.
egh..

the only good thing I have is Noal.

Someone turn on the dashboard confessional and pass me a bottle of perkasets! PLEASE! I feel so fucking emo and I want to shoot someone in the face.