some writing after a long time of not writing
Hello
This, if I have enough time, will be an interesting post, for me at least, I have to write a paper for school and I need to get some thoughts flowing-- but more inportantly i need to write and organize and refine my thoughts in words or writing- something I have not done for a rather long time.
i really haven't written in a very long time, not LJ written, but my self, personal written, and I think it has helped me out a lot in the past so I should continue to do it again. I didn't fall asleep till like 4 last night and it sucked, it drives me crazy when I can't fall asleep and I want to. I haven't gotten to hang out with a lot of my good friends for a while now, mostly since the beginning of this summer, and I feel it has changed me, i don't feel very confident or happy-- or as much as I did when I got to see them. I don't know if I just want things to be the same as they were in the past and things have changed and I need to adjust, or if i need to see them a lot more. I want to see my friends, especially the ones i haven't seen or talked to in a while or don't know well anymore. I feel some kind of anxiety when thinking about calling and talking to people, I feel like I never kept up in the first place so that calling them now would be akward, like they wern't important enough to me for me to actually keep up with them. I am self centered, I think about what I want to do at College and life and that we need to live our lives were we are at school, but i think that everyone has some of that self centerdness, with school and life and jobs at this point in life right now, that we should define ourselfs by living our own life and forming new friendships and ideas. So i still feel that I haven't talked to my friends as much as I should. I miss them. new and old, friends ive had for a long time to people I just met (or got to know better) this summer at camp I. Still I'm not sure why I feel shitty, but besides feeling shitty, if its not the cause of the shittyness, i miss my friends. even just sitting here i want to say i will make an effort to see people more and talk to more people i haven't seen in a while I think that I'm not going to, that im to caught up in school work and stuff. i do want to see and talk to people. It may take a little bit though. I don't want to go into the working world with nothing to do but my job and fall asleep after i get home. I miss my friends, girlfriend and family and its draining me.
Ok, well thats a little better, I have a paper to write now,till tomorrow, miss you all
--Ryan
This, if I have enough time, will be an interesting post, for me at least, I have to write a paper for school and I need to get some thoughts flowing-- but more inportantly i need to write and organize and refine my thoughts in words or writing- something I have not done for a rather long time.
i really haven't written in a very long time, not LJ written, but my self, personal written, and I think it has helped me out a lot in the past so I should continue to do it again. I didn't fall asleep till like 4 last night and it sucked, it drives me crazy when I can't fall asleep and I want to. I haven't gotten to hang out with a lot of my good friends for a while now, mostly since the beginning of this summer, and I feel it has changed me, i don't feel very confident or happy-- or as much as I did when I got to see them. I don't know if I just want things to be the same as they were in the past and things have changed and I need to adjust, or if i need to see them a lot more. I want to see my friends, especially the ones i haven't seen or talked to in a while or don't know well anymore. I feel some kind of anxiety when thinking about calling and talking to people, I feel like I never kept up in the first place so that calling them now would be akward, like they wern't important enough to me for me to actually keep up with them. I am self centered, I think about what I want to do at College and life and that we need to live our lives were we are at school, but i think that everyone has some of that self centerdness, with school and life and jobs at this point in life right now, that we should define ourselfs by living our own life and forming new friendships and ideas. So i still feel that I haven't talked to my friends as much as I should. I miss them. new and old, friends ive had for a long time to people I just met (or got to know better) this summer at camp I. Still I'm not sure why I feel shitty, but besides feeling shitty, if its not the cause of the shittyness, i miss my friends. even just sitting here i want to say i will make an effort to see people more and talk to more people i haven't seen in a while I think that I'm not going to, that im to caught up in school work and stuff. i do want to see and talk to people. It may take a little bit though. I don't want to go into the working world with nothing to do but my job and fall asleep after i get home. I miss my friends, girlfriend and family and its draining me.
Ok, well thats a little better, I have a paper to write now,till tomorrow, miss you all
--Ryan