EVERYTHING IS BROKEN...ESPECIALLY ME
"IF I ONLY COULD
MAKE A DEAL WITH GOD
AND GET HIM TO SWAP OUR PLACES...
YOU DON'T WANT TO HURT ME
BUT SEE HOW DEEP THE BULLET LIES"
~ RUNNING UP THAT HILL
IF THAT COULD BE TRUE FOR EVEN A FEW MOMENTS YOU'D SEE THAT THERE'S NOTHING TO BE AFRAID OF. I DON'T RESENT YOU EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A MILLION REASONS TO DO SO. I THINK YOU ARE ONLY AFRAID OF YOURSELF AND IT FRIGHTENS YOU,. YOU'RE STILL UNSURE OF WHO YOU ARE. WORRIED I WON'T STAY.....I'VE STAYED THIS LONG HAVEN'T I. I'VE BEEN GOOD TO YOU. YOU CAN'T SEE THAT. YOU TRULY ARE BLIND. I ONLY ASK FOR HONESTY AND FOR YOU TO BE A LITTLE MORE OPEN AND TRUSTING. IF THIS IS TOO MUCH TO ASK THEN YOU CAN'T TRULY LOVE ANYONE BUT YOURSELF AND THAT SADDENS ME. QUIT TRYING TO PUT THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD. I CAN MAKE UP MY OWN MIND. I DON'T HATE WHAT YOU'RE INTO . I HATE THAT YOU HOLD SECRETS, HIDE NORMAL INTERESTS, AND LIE ABOUT TRIVIAL THINGS. THIS IS SOMETHING ONLY YOU CAN CHANGE, BUT ONLY IF YOU WANT TO . I ONLY WANT FOR THIS TO BE ABOUT US, NOT ABOUT YOU. IF YOU DON'T LET ME INTO THIS PART OF YOUR LIFE YOU ARE ONLY PUSHING ME AWAY AND I'M SO TIRED OF RESISTING. IT'S RIDICULOUS. THERE'S NO POINT. WHEN YOU KEEP HIDE AND LIE ABOUT SHIT THAT ISN'T THAT BIG OF A DEAL THAT'S WHEN IT BECOMES AN ISSUE FOR ME. I DON'T KNOW HOW ELSE TO EXPLAIN IT. FRANKLY I'VE EXPLAINED IT SO MANY TIMES IN SO MANY WAYS I DON'T SEE HOW YOUR MISSING THE POINT....IT'S NOT WHAT YOU DO THAT HURTS ME IT'S THAT I'M NOT INVOLVED IN THAT PART OF YOUR LIFE AND THAT YOU KEEP IT SO SECRET. WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER IF IT WAS JUST OUT IN THE OPEN. WHAT'S THE POINT IN ARGUING THIS AGAIN? THIS TIME EITHER YOU GET IT OR YOU DON'T. ITS OUT OF MY HANDS. LET ME KNOW IF YOU CAN HANDLE THIS.