(no subject)
I absolutely detest the moments in life where there is nothing and no one around or willing to distract you from your thoughts. You sit there, alone, in the room that is way too quiet, face to face with things to painful or confusing to contemplate. Things like why you never are, never have been, and probably never will be truly happy, or why you cry for "no reason" at the drop of a hat bog down your mind. More often than not people are too self-absorbed and caught up in such petty bullshit that they don't even notice you're struggling to breathe. When they do take notice they have this way of making it about them anyhow and then you have another problem that YOU get to help out with as if you don't already have more in your mouth than you can chew.
Actually, sometimes it's easier to deal with things alone because then you don't have to incessantly explain that it's not your job, people you know, or a problem with a boy causing these fucked up feelings. It is indeed something within you that you can't quite put your finger on and nobody is able or patient enough to sift through the shit to help you find that stable ground where you can be you again and stop being so fucking lost.
Actually, sometimes it's easier to deal with things alone because then you don't have to incessantly explain that it's not your job, people you know, or a problem with a boy causing these fucked up feelings. It is indeed something within you that you can't quite put your finger on and nobody is able or patient enough to sift through the shit to help you find that stable ground where you can be you again and stop being so fucking lost.