I wish to be peter pan.
I will fly away to NeverNeverLand with mermaids and lost boys and I will never grow up. I will not make decisions and I will not worry about money or schooling or future plans because there will be no future plans. only today. only now. only the lagoon and the rocks and the hideaway in the tree.
and I will sing.
there will be no one who dissapoints me. no one who leaves.
i am not ready to be an adult. i am barely ready to be a person. i am still a child, but my body has grown faster than my mind and i cannot adapt to having to be an adult when my mind is still playing with building blocks and barbie dolls, wishing wells and shooting stars, the moon in june and i'm still in a cocoon.
i am still forming. i am not done yet.
sometimes i cry. and think of the shooting stars and the moon in june and the way your smile lights up a room and how they died inside my mind the day they told me santa was a myth and the tooth fairy was just a story and you're too big for that now, you're a big girl.
but mommy you forget i'm really only five foot two, which isn't so big at all but you send me out into the world where santa lies and sissy cries and everyone looks to the skies even though we all know that shooting stars are rare.
and the sky stays bare.
and NeverNeverLand has never never looked so enticing, when you compare.
and I will sing.
there will be no one who dissapoints me. no one who leaves.
i am not ready to be an adult. i am barely ready to be a person. i am still a child, but my body has grown faster than my mind and i cannot adapt to having to be an adult when my mind is still playing with building blocks and barbie dolls, wishing wells and shooting stars, the moon in june and i'm still in a cocoon.
i am still forming. i am not done yet.
sometimes i cry. and think of the shooting stars and the moon in june and the way your smile lights up a room and how they died inside my mind the day they told me santa was a myth and the tooth fairy was just a story and you're too big for that now, you're a big girl.
but mommy you forget i'm really only five foot two, which isn't so big at all but you send me out into the world where santa lies and sissy cries and everyone looks to the skies even though we all know that shooting stars are rare.
and the sky stays bare.
and NeverNeverLand has never never looked so enticing, when you compare.