it's been a while...
so i know i havn't posted in like, forever. but life happened.
the fantastical, shiny new job turned out to be less fantastical and more. WORST. THING. EVER. it's not that i'm not cut out for dental nursing. it's just that the management i'm under is well... awful, horrendous, heinous. do i need more words or do you get the point?
i actually had to sign an agreement that i wouldn't slag them off online. but whatever, i'm anonymous on here and they'd never find me. besides i'm not mentioning the company name. ew.
so i realise that probably noone is going to read this. considering you've probably all buggered off. plus the main person i used to talk to was charmedfire. we're still together btw. almost 2 years now. and there's been a proposal i might add. congrats are in order. thank you. thank you.
i should be in bed really. i know 19. and LAME! but since the bastards i work for insist on working me well over my 40 hours i need all the rest i can get. there i go again. god i'm such a whiney little shit.
i've been thinking about you guys a lot recently. idk who you guys are. i've become a lurker again. sticking to fanfiction. it's bad. i liked the freedom. i liked being myself. LJ gave me the courage to come out. to be more confident. it's like i've regressed. my job has battered me. life has. i'm going backwards. but i have to see it through. you see i sit my exam in november. and then i will be a GDC registered qualified dental nurse. not that i want to do anything with that fucktard qualification. but you've got to have a back up right?
no. what i want to do... is make cakes. i do that. i made a leopard print boot. a record player. a cake with sheep on! and they taste good. they do. but what am i doing? dental nursing. check me. chasing my dreams there. way to go jen.
actually. i am chasing one dream. i got my original sin tat awhile back. if you remember me talking about that. and i just had my first angel tat finished. yes lucifer is a fat arse fallen angel on my lower back. next stop. gabriel. and then? who knows. it's nice. to be doing something i've dreamed about. maybe thats whats got me in this mood. i want to feel like i've acheived something. because i havn't in so long. i love my girl. but i constantly worried i'm not enough for her. she's goes to uni in september. and i'm so afraid she's gona leave me behind. off in her artsy film world. where geeky me doesn't fit.
i don't really know why i'm writing this. but i think i'm gonna start writing more. maybe wack out some more drabbles. and dare i say it. a one shot?. dear lord that would be the day. jennie writes more than 1000 words! shock horror.
that's enough rambling from me for today.
over and out,
Pink Mönkey