(no subject)
Sooooooooooo... I'm doing the Residential Planning program through the Art Institute. So far, so good. I've got 100% in my computer class, but that isn't hard. Everything is online, and I'm liking it really well. I'm disciplined and detailed enough to do online school, plus this way, I don't have to think of what to wear every day to class.
The other day I had a tiny meltdown, where I planned on moving us to London and not ever having contact with the majority of people that I know now. My conversation with a few people involved statements like, "I fucking hate Arizona, I fucking hate the people here, I fucking hate everything..." YES! I had turned into one of THOSE people, if only for a day.
I don't really have any friends here, it's god-awful hot, everyone drives like a fucking idiot, most people have no ambition to be or do anything different than exactly what they're doing... There were just a million reasons that this place was the worst place to ever exist. But really, it's not Arizona's fault. It's really not a bad place, if you think about it. Most of the year, the weather is pretty nice, and I do have a few very close friends here.
It's really situations, and people acting like children that get me all riled up. I expect people to act a certain way, and they don't. I expect that people shouldn't annoy me, and they do. Nothing goes my way! So I get upset and make plans to run away. Would another place really be any better? Would it be filled with people who have ambition and drive, people you can trust, who don't make immature decisions? No, I don't think so. The same people are everywhere, and I'm sure my actions drive them just as crazy as they drive me! So, I've got to shit or get off the pot.
I get really tired of hearing everyone talking about doing something, but never doing it. I don't want to be one of those people. I think that's why I decided that school would be a good idea for me. I didn't want to sit around complaining about my lame job forever, but not do anything to change it. I started to tell the douche bags at my work to shut up when their conversations start sounding like locker-room talk. I have plans in my head, but won't discuss or share them until they are actually going to become reality. That way, if they never come to fruition, I don't look like a flake. We're going to finish the kitchen, we're going to get going on our plans for the band...
A return to trip to London, plans for Canada. Even if this never becomes anything, at least I'll know I tried my hardest. I'm good at some things, and I'm going to focus on those. The bad stuff will (hopefully) fade to black. I'm sorry I'm not your friend. I just don't find it that easy to coddle people. (coddle: to treat with extreme or excessive care or kindness : pamper)
The other day I had a tiny meltdown, where I planned on moving us to London and not ever having contact with the majority of people that I know now. My conversation with a few people involved statements like, "I fucking hate Arizona, I fucking hate the people here, I fucking hate everything..." YES! I had turned into one of THOSE people, if only for a day.
I don't really have any friends here, it's god-awful hot, everyone drives like a fucking idiot, most people have no ambition to be or do anything different than exactly what they're doing... There were just a million reasons that this place was the worst place to ever exist. But really, it's not Arizona's fault. It's really not a bad place, if you think about it. Most of the year, the weather is pretty nice, and I do have a few very close friends here.
It's really situations, and people acting like children that get me all riled up. I expect people to act a certain way, and they don't. I expect that people shouldn't annoy me, and they do. Nothing goes my way! So I get upset and make plans to run away. Would another place really be any better? Would it be filled with people who have ambition and drive, people you can trust, who don't make immature decisions? No, I don't think so. The same people are everywhere, and I'm sure my actions drive them just as crazy as they drive me! So, I've got to shit or get off the pot.
I get really tired of hearing everyone talking about doing something, but never doing it. I don't want to be one of those people. I think that's why I decided that school would be a good idea for me. I didn't want to sit around complaining about my lame job forever, but not do anything to change it. I started to tell the douche bags at my work to shut up when their conversations start sounding like locker-room talk. I have plans in my head, but won't discuss or share them until they are actually going to become reality. That way, if they never come to fruition, I don't look like a flake. We're going to finish the kitchen, we're going to get going on our plans for the band...
A return to trip to London, plans for Canada. Even if this never becomes anything, at least I'll know I tried my hardest. I'm good at some things, and I'm going to focus on those. The bad stuff will (hopefully) fade to black. I'm sorry I'm not your friend. I just don't find it that easy to coddle people. (coddle: to treat with extreme or excessive care or kindness : pamper)