SoOoOOOo

[pinklipstikxkis]

My room is completely done being painted. Derek and I are getting along well...except for when he called my fav. song gay :( but its okay. I call most of his music gay too.I havent spoken to pat and when i do speak to him its very short and rude. Ha stupid ass thats what he deserves ive put up with his bullshit for long enough! Mom came in the kitchen when i came back from practice and erin was there too and (erin cut her hair UGLY short) and Erin was like yea did you hear mom pat got a cell phone. I was like "ha i want the number so i can call it and be like asshole and hang up and call and and be like asshole and hang up" Then Erin was telling me how i couldnt be a flyer. But cristin wants me to fly basket tosses. My mom was like i think you'll be fne. ((for once my mom believes in me)) Then my dad came in the kitchen after i bitched out erin for taking pats side of the argument with the "on the rag" thing. My dad was looking at my reportcard which is like 2 months old, and he goes "Why did you get a C in geometry?" and i was like bcuz it was hard. Hes like " You couldve done better" and i said " yea dad im never good enough for you, but pat can fail english twice and you dont even care!" and i ran in my room and started bawling my eyes out. im never fucking good enough for him. I used to do everything to make him proud of me...but i relized i never can because im not the holy child patrick! Ive alienated most of my family. I have Cait Mom and Bink left. Who cares I dont need pat erin or dad. Ive got the TAZ to replace their uselessness. I dont think pat understands why im so mad at him. Usually after about a day were cool again after this kinda shit. But im not letting it go ne more. Erin told me the only way this would ever go away is if i let it go. But if i keep letting things like that go he'll never relize what hes doing wrong! Not that he even cares that hes doing something wrong. Hes some sorta messed up psycho fuckhole!*Sigh* well this has been an extremely long one for me...

I miss my wee one! amber!! ::tear:: we had fun yesterday tho! with the grass cutting and "war paint" lmao that was sooo hilarous!