oh god.......
:'(
why do i have to act like such a fucking twat sometimes?
le sigh
&is it possible to be like, slightly bipolar?
one day happy, one sad
god this sucks what's wrong with me
in the end i went out to try and cheer myself up, it was nice to see cazz, but....
i just felt like taking loads of drugs and alcohol and smoking until i was sick
but it's because of these times that i wanted to make the concious desicsion to stop
and now again, i feel so alone
on.my.own
&will i ever have anyone?
&will i ever be happy?
&will i ever do anything right?
i don't think i can wait through years more of this torture
if only
i werent' me
if i were just
someone else
someone not;
obsessive
annoying
boring
melodramatic
self pitying and absorbed
a try hard
unnattractive
compulsive
overannalysing
dreamy
fickle
useless
ok god i'm going to stop because people are going to think i'm only fishing for sympathy
i saw rosie lancaster at the end of escape.i can't believe she's in brighton, &i can't believe she was there all night and i didn't see her, i wish i had, it would've been so fun to have been out with her, and especially tonight i felt like i needed to be with someone that i had at least some kind of long term relationship with.but numbers were exchanged and such
i wish,
no i don't wish i was at home,
i wish i had,
i wish i could get,
i guess i just need to be someone else
someone entirely different
someone not me
x
why do i have to act like such a fucking twat sometimes?
le sigh
&is it possible to be like, slightly bipolar?
one day happy, one sad
god this sucks what's wrong with me
in the end i went out to try and cheer myself up, it was nice to see cazz, but....
i just felt like taking loads of drugs and alcohol and smoking until i was sick
but it's because of these times that i wanted to make the concious desicsion to stop
and now again, i feel so alone
on.my.own
&will i ever have anyone?
&will i ever be happy?
&will i ever do anything right?
i don't think i can wait through years more of this torture
if only
i werent' me
if i were just
someone else
someone not;
obsessive
annoying
boring
melodramatic
self pitying and absorbed
a try hard
unnattractive
compulsive
overannalysing
dreamy
fickle
useless
ok god i'm going to stop because people are going to think i'm only fishing for sympathy
i saw rosie lancaster at the end of escape.i can't believe she's in brighton, &i can't believe she was there all night and i didn't see her, i wish i had, it would've been so fun to have been out with her, and especially tonight i felt like i needed to be with someone that i had at least some kind of long term relationship with.but numbers were exchanged and such
i wish,
no i don't wish i was at home,
i wish i had,
i wish i could get,
i guess i just need to be someone else
someone entirely different
someone not me
x